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Posted On: June 8th 2026, 11:38 am
I know this one is controversial, and I am totally open to hearing your opinions on this!
I just think it’s important to acknowledge that this is a ‘compliment’ that:
- values a smaller body over a bigger one
- makes people aware that you notice their body fluctuations
- can give people a fear of weight regain
- is often based on the assumption that weight loss is always a positive thing, when it isn’t necessarily
- may unintentionally praise someone for a body change that was caused by stress, grief, illness, or an eating disorder
- shifts attention to appearance rather than who someone is or how they’re doing
- can make people in larger bodies feel like the opposite message is being communicated.
None of this means people who say it have bad intentions - most of the time they’re trying to be kind.
I just think it’s worth asking why ‘you look thinner’ is so often treated as a compliment in the first place, and what that says about the value we place on different bodies.
I just think it’s important to acknowledge that this is a ‘compliment’ that:
- values a smaller body over a bigger one
- makes people aware that you notice their body fluctuations
- can give people a fear of weight regain
- is often based on the assumption that weight loss is always a positive thing, when it isn’t necessarily
- may unintentionally praise someone for a body change that was caused by stress, grief, illness, or an eating disorder
- shifts attention to appearance rather than who someone is or how they’re doing
- can make people in larger bodies feel like the opposite message is being communicated.
None of this means people who say it have bad intentions - most of the time they’re trying to be kind.
I just think it’s worth asking why ‘you look thinner’ is so often treated as a compliment in the first place, and what that says about the value we place on different bodies.
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