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TATTOO CONCEPT / BLACKWORK / FINELINE / MICROREALISMO

@stronger.element

17 days ago

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Posted On: October 19th 2026, 02:13 pm

AMOR INFINITO
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#quebradademacul #chilenaturaleza #trailrunningcommunity #treking

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100 days. 100.

We all just feel gutted without him.

I haven’t been able to find a new normal. How can you? It’s like my body is waiting for him to come home. Like somehow this can’t possible be our life.

Halloween was hard for all of us.

Seeing little boys trick or treating. Knowing how much Haze would have loved it all. The costumes. The candy. Being with the big kids.

I couldn’t handle it. So I went home for a couple hours and just sat there.

Curtis and I finally pulled it back together and met back up with our kids and their friends.

And then Kash broke down.

He told me how hard the night had been. How much he missed Haze. He said exactly what I was feeling.

He said he wore his “Shoot 4 Haze” shirt underneath his costume to feel him close. And that it was the only thing that got him through the night. 😭

I felt so terrible. I’d been so consumed by my own grief I hadn’t even thought to check up on him.

Haze was his little sidekick. Those two were inseparable.

Last Halloween, Kash walked door to door with Haze. He didn’t care that it put him miles behind his friends. He just wanted to be with his little brother. To watch him have the best night.

And this year he was walking those same streets without him. It’s just so unfair.

Halloween was hard. But the reality is - everyday is hard. Because everyday with our boy was perfect.

The age gap was the best of both worlds. During the day - Haze almost felt like and only child. I got to soak up every minute of our one on one time together.

But then also get the joy of seeing the big kids get home from school and just melt in his arms. They’d scoop him up and love on him like they hadn’t seen him in weeks. Hazey would squeal with excitement.

I loved watching them love him.

He was the center of our world. The best part of all of our days.

And now we’re all just trying to figure out how to live without him. 100 days of missing him in every single part of our lives.

The weight of forever without him feels impossible. I don’t want a new normal.

#hazemitchell #grief #childloss

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