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Bonnie

@lady_bonnie_macbeth

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An account for beautiful Bonnie Macbeth and all her adventures. Greenwich Girl. Foul mouthed, bad tempered little bitch. Mum @alwaysasj

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OK, right. There has been a lot of ‘baby talk’ about my little brother. OK, right. I like him more than I thought I would - so what?! He schtinks of my Mum and pewpty pewpty pants, divine. He’s not THAT loud, that’s a bonus. I’ve been listening to that little mewling bitch’s heartbeat for a good couple of months now and even though he’s a little rat, I will FIGHT you if you hurt him as he is my little lion prince. However….if any of you think he’s cuter than I am - you are SORELY mistaken. If you need evidence, no problem. Check me out as a puppy. Check me out now. Check out these photos. Humans can jump off a short pier man. Happy should have been your birth day Prince Xander of ShiteTown, love you till the end, no do one into quiet. by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

I miss schlepping around Leeds like a hole in the scone but I miss my Dark Carnival slagz. Where are you and how am I supposed to live without you mad bastards? by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

Absolutely shitting rinsed mate and sad to be leaving the North, where the water tastes better than shite Thames Water. But I am looking forward to seeing all my Greenwich schalppers an taking advantage of my Grandad’s chicken treats benevolence. You’re all a bunch of mugz. Rats in the dungeon doesn’t even come close to what you all are. Excuse me while I frap off to the new Raye album. Cheers by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

In these cash-strapped times I have to use all the fucking talents I’ve got to ensure that there is chicken on my bone when I hit the sack. In all seriousness, I have to say, amongst the actor-musicians, I am where I belong. There’s not much I enjoy about living in the South of England. It is pure rat vibez. Living for a bit in the freezing North has put hair back on my little malshi tats, love the dark piece I’m directing, actually like the actors for once (sorry, but I fake it MOST of the time slagz) and can’t wait to see their sorrowful arses on Monday morning for some more crying about death. Physical Theatre slaps. Especially when they’ve got a Clarinet stuffed up their back chuff doing cartwheels. Buzz. Also met Mum’s mukka @oliviabromley_ - sexy bastard. Also vistited Haworth (again, boring) with my rentals. Sad to see they’ve closed down the best tea shop in the place to make way for some auld Cathy/Elodi glam-trauma-porn shite. Emily Bronte would turn in her grave. To be fair she’s probably be in to that - gothic schlapper #darkcarnival 📸 @benjaminlmorris by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

Merry Christmas, you filthy animals x by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

Yeah. You haven’t heard from me for a while, have you underlings. That’s ’cause I’ve been travelling around Europe. I’ve literally been everywhere and I’m over it. General opinion is Greece beats Italy (do bears shit in the woods) but Verona and Florence are still boss. Bran Castle is for pussies and motorhome life is not for me - I prefer the noofty knobhead life. Still though. It was good being a ring bearer. Now who is bearing my chicken treats suckers? by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

Many thanks to @pawsome_athens for making me look fresh af for my parents wedding. Less so for the pollack ass bow in my hair, what is this l? Toddlers and Tiaras? My mum liked it though so whatever. Got to please the crowd when I’m getting my Greek on. Anyway, boss groom - nice one 🐾 by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

Honest to god I HATE musical theatre but this Carousel lot have whet my appetite for the classics. Prepare yourself for a new stagey Lady Bonnie Macbeth, ready to tear the stage apart with moves and fast acting furry fury mate. Coming for you with jazz paws. Congratulations to this STUNNING cast, so much love for them - considering they’re all twirls by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

New idea for a Fringe Show, and look - I’ve already made the shite poster for you all to stick up in your horse ass shops. Wait for it. Beautiful Malshi dog meets hairy giant who wants to be a dog.
Beautiful Malshi wants to be a human. So they trade places. It’s called ‘Hairy’. Fucking shite. 5 Stars, Bobby Award, Fringe First. Come on then. Happy EdFringe everyone. @roddylynch by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

Rosie and Jim, Rosie and Jim, tugging along and tugging each other. Ugly papier mache bastards. Honestly can’t imagine ANYTHING worse than living on one of these horse ass boats with the auld voles coming up licking my paws when I’m asleep. Goodnight and thank you puppet FUCKERRRRRSSSSS!!!!! by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

Dads come in fur sizes too. Happy Father’s Day to my brilliant Dad who I bully the shite out of ‘cause he’s as soft as shit. We love you @roddylynch by @lady_bonnie_macbeth

Tour was EXHAUSTING. Glad to be cuddled up under my Grandma’s blanket hiding from all things Musical Theatre. Shut up your holes. You ain’t ever caught a rabbit! Love my hookah @freyasands thanks also to the @kingstontheatrehotel for the treats. ‘Tis good of ‘ya to talk to me in such a place as this is. Oh brother! by @lady_bonnie_macbeth