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D.J. Baker

@mxdjbaker

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QT Acespec
Do all you can while you can. In all that you do, let be good and let it be out of love
Gender and Birth Doula • Advocate • Dreamer

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Happy Father's/Daddy's Day to all of the Seahorse Dads!

Yes, this means trans, nonbinary, and even intersex Dads that call themselves Fathers regardless if they carried/birthed their own or not. This also for the trans men who may have a difficult relationship with calling themselves fathers or dads. You're valid as a parent, no matter your gender or how your children address you.

In case, you didn't know: Men can birth their own children just as seahorses do. Which is why the Seahorse is powerful symbol of what can be and that nature calls more than one gender in birthing role. Being a father isn't about what genitalia you possess but how you show up in a child's life. With intentional love, care, attunement, guidance, gentleness, emotional intelligence, and lovingkindness.

Whether you've carried your children in your belly and/or on your shoulders! We honor you today!

A special recognition to a few daddies I love and revere:

@jvckmagic
@jordon_thepest
@kaydenxofficial
@lumen_midwifery

Artwork by: @mygenderation by @mxdjbaker

It's been over a decade since I've been celebrating Pride. I remember coming out to my boss at 21 years old in the Mississippi Delta. I was shaking in my boots, literally. And her response, "Okay, love is love" I was in absolute is shock. Like it was too easy. But that very acceptance, especially from a wise black woman, gave me comfort, confidence, and profound sense of self. It renewed my faith in God and in my community.

10 years later, that sense of self is being challenged to new heights. Now more than ever Pride is vital in a time where our country is being faced with it's own heart and humanity. It's vital for me in a time where my memory, my body, my confidence, what gives me my own sense of self has been slipping. I recently went through hours for neuropsych testing so I can not pathologize myself but deepen my understanding of what I've been through and what I am going through and the impact it has/is making on my body and my brain.

My stories are real. My life matters. And they live in me. As queer people our lives truly matter. As Black queer people our lives matter. Our stories and our ancestors live in us. This is real and it's not a game.

This Pride, if I can ask nothing else, I ask YOU to see into others around you, especially queer people. Many narratives sexualize, demonize, and dehumanize the queer community. When "love is love" and queer people have families, birth children, have mamas, papas, and zazas. As extraordinary as the LGBTQIA community, we are also everyday ordinary people who can and will be great and continue to make profound impact that makes true freedom and liberation reality.

I pray to God that every trans and queer child can find themselves as God has made them full and whole. I pray that every adult can respect the autonomy and humanity in their own children and other people's to allow themselves to embody confidence, joy, courage, comfort, safety, humanity, divine, and sense of self. Some also call this self-determination.

Happy Pride to my lovely friends Adrianna, Christian, Gabriel, Jay, to younger and future self, and the many more people close to me in my life that keep my smile, laughing, loving, and in joy. by @mxdjbaker

Join us for a Sex Week Boston event! 🌈

Labor of Love; Exploring Sex, Relationships & Gender-Affirming Birth in Queer & Trans Community

📆 Tuesday, May 12 | 6pm - 8pm | South Shore Family Health Collaborative

We’re moving beyond the clinical and getting into the heart of gender-affirming sex, birth, and the beautiful, messy evolution of queer relationships.

The Agenda:
- How we envision and manifest our families on our own terms
- Navigating the shifts in intimacy, desire, and connection that come with the journey to parenthood
- Guidance on perinatal care, the “childbirth fast course,” and postpartum care—tailored specifically for our community’s bodies and spirits
- Real talk on the available routes and resources in family planning

Whether you’re just starting to wonder “what if,” or you’re already deep in the glow (and the grind), come settle in for a night of wisdom, connection, and the radical act of dreaming our futures into existence.

Link in bio to RSVP 🪩 by @mxdjbaker

Join us for a Sex Week Boston event 🌈 🩷 Labor of Love; Exploring Gender-Affirming Sex, Birth, & Relationships in Queer & Trans Community

📆 Tuesday, May 12 | 6pm - 8pm | Location TBD

From family conecpt to newborn care; a conversation with Jess Baker of Sir Doula and trans sex therapist Jordon Anderson about dreaming queer family into reality and the relationship challenges and changes along the way.

Open to all. Link in bio to RSVP by @mxdjbaker

It is high time that I offer some much-delayed gratitude for Calvin Gimpelevich's mention of 🏳️‍⚧️Queer Spa🚿 in his recent essay with the @lareviewofbooks, "Sweating It Out: The history of experiencing life as a sweaty body in steamy queer spaces." (Required reading for this Sunday's sauna @queerspaboston ?)

Despite now being based in NYC, @calvin.calvin.g continues to organize T4T Readings, a Boston-area queer literary series that he founded, and he will be their featured guest this thursday (check out @t4t.readings for details).

Special thanks to Queer Spa co-organizers @_thepandashow @mxdjbaker @the.punkmonk, lets keep making this dream happen✨ by @mxdjbaker

🏳️‍⚧️ Happy Trans Day of Visibility! 🏳️‍⚧️

Today, I had the honor to speak on the behalf of @bostonwomensfund and the many transgender and gender-expansive that I am in community with alongside my dear friend, @gabriel_rvss, Rep. Sam Montaño, even @massgovernor Healey at the Massachusetts State House aka the People's house.

"I want to say to every trans, nonbinary, intersex, and gender-expansive. I hear you. I see you. In all your complexities, beauties, in your tears, and in your joy. I see you in the Common. I see you at the RMV. I see you in JP, Worcester, Haverhill, and Springfield. I am proud of my heritage as a trans person. I look forward to a day that our visibility is common occurrence for anyone in Massachusetts, America, and the World, in ways like my blackness. Meaning, it’s not a visibility that is associated with dehumanization, scarcity, or fear but one that celebrates queer joy. One that celebrates queer love. One that celebrates queer births, and one that sees, honors, and celebrates ALL queer and trans lives.

For me today isn't just the Trans Day of Visibility but a Trans Day of Joy, a joy that carries me each and every day." 🏳️‍⚧️

#tdov #transvisibility #transdayofvisibility by @mxdjbaker

So glad I got to spend some time with loved ones on our birthday shared with @realdwade22 ! Happy birthday to us! Happy Birthday to my forever twin, @jd__baker

So glad I get share my life with such amazing and beautiful people.

We attended a record breaking opening day game for @bostonlegacyfc and then finished the evening at @longliveroxbury and ate some delicious @mandmbbq

Each of these people truly mean the world to me! My friends, partners, and co-conspirators. Thank you for celebrating us and your outpouring of love, support, kindness, accountability, and grace every single day.

And yes we say in traffic longer than the game. And yes it was freezing and windy but the sky was bright and beautiful! by @mxdjbaker

This time, a year from yesterday, I had just been broken up with on my birthday. Something that wasn't as jarring and sad as what the relationship had become and what I ultimately allowed myself to endure. Cycles of abuse, harm, humiliation, shame, and embarrassment.

What that day set in motion has been a series of challenges and changes that I'm still navigating from displacment/homelessness, medical diagnoses like EDS and POTS, memory loss and issues of word retrieval, so much inner turmoil and confusion. And with all of these things, the inability to work and perform like I once did, especially my early 20s.

These things have followed me into this year but they don't define me or my ability overcome them. What's come along with them is maturation, new relationships, redefined and deepened sense of myself and the communities I belong to. These challenges and changes aren't just hurdles I'm having to endure but Calls to action and calling back to God and myself, in which They made me.

It's a New Beginning for me. It's a new grace. It's a new life before me. Slowly taking shape is a newer, polished, and reshaped version of who I once was, feel I am, and vision who I can and want to be. I'm still verily flawed and don't have all the answers, let alone even 2 answers. 😅

But this here. These smiles, this joy and justice that demand to come out of me are calling and rocking my boat. The only thing I know that tomorrow brings is a new beginning.

Thank you for the birthday wishes, love, and regards.

My vemmo/cashapp are: mxdjbaker if you want to help me out in this time or send some birthday love. by @mxdjbaker

This 100th Black History Month, I organized and facilitated through The Queer Neighborhood Council TQNC a Black Queer Storytelling event. In tandem with our storytelling, I compiled a list of 28 by Black queer authors. These books range from fiction, nonfiction, art/photography, poetry, and memoirs.

Please take a look. Enjoy reading. 📖 by @mxdjbaker

Ancestral practices. Modern legacies. 🕊️

Thank you to everyone who joined us for Black Queer Storytelling. This space was a testament to the fact that our queer history is black history and black history is American history. Black queer folx have always been the blueprint.

Huge gratitude to the dedicated group of collaborators that made this happen:

Partners: @queerdosboston @blu_foundation617
Host: @parksidebookshop
Catering: @formaggiokitchen 🧀
Wellness: @fitness4allbodies for the grounding meditation
Archives: @queerhistoryboston for the archival imagery
Facilitation: A heartfelt thank you to @mxdjbaker, whose passion for community organizing showed in every detail

This was our first storytelling event, but it certainly won’t be our last. Stay tuned.

📚 Support local! Our Black Queer Reads featured on slide 3 are available at @parksidebookshop

Slide 3 Books (from left to right):
1. Queer histories by Adriano Pedrosa, Julia Bryan-Wilson, André Mesquita, Leandro Muniz, Teo Teotônio
2. Felix Ever After by Kacen Callander
3. A Black Queer History of the United States by C. Riley Snorton
4. Giovanni’s Room by James Baldwin
Notable mention: The Fantasies of Future Things by Doug Jones by @mxdjbaker

We’re still on! ☃️ See you TOMORROW!

📆 Tues. Feb. 24 | 5:30 PM - 8 PM | Parkside Bookshop

LGBTQIA+ members of the African Diaspora are invited to Black Queer Storytelling—a sacred space to reclaim our narratives through the ancestral practice of Oral Histories.

What’s you story? Come ready to listen and/or share.

We couldn’t do this without the incredible support of

@parksidebookshop
@queerhistoryboston
@queerdosboston
@fitness4allbodies
@blu_foundation617
@formaggiokitchen

Thank you for investing in our stories.

— @mxdjbaker

Link in bio to RSVP

photo credit: @queerhistoryboston Digital Archives by @mxdjbaker

This year I set out to do the little things that bring me joy. Choosing joy, wherever and however I can.

Kayaking and being on the water is something that has brought me joy since I was child. And doing it with my beloved partner, loved ones, and dear friends, and even queer strangers has made it even sweeter.

I have waiting to make this post for a while putting my words and heart together.

I must give my gratitude to each of these amazing folks who have entered into my life, each of you in your own special way.

Paddling through on the water and through the winds of life with you has brought me joy and I hope the same for you. by @mxdjbaker