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NIRWANA GRADUATION

@nirwana.grad

2 years ago

Photo by NIRWANA GRADUATION on June 11, 2024.

Photo by NIRWANA GRADUATION on June 11, 2024.

Photo by NIRWANA GRADUATION on June 11, 2024.

Photo by NIRWANA GRADUATION on June 11, 2024.

Photo by NIRWANA GRADUATION on June 11, 2024.

Photo by NIRWANA GRADUATION on June 11, 2024.

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Posted On: June 11th 2024, 05:59 pm

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Some people aren’t pursuing intimacy with you. They’re pursuing information about you. And without discernment, you can mistake the two. Some people admire you but are intimidated by what they admire. So they search for imperfections in your life to make themselves feel better about their own.

They’ll ask personal questions, share vulnerable stories, or create conversations that encourage you to overshare. Not necessarily because they want to know you better, but because they need reassurance that you’re not as happy, secure, or successful as you appear. Some people want proximity to you for the social currency, but information about you for their personal insecurity.

And what’s interesting is that these people don’t always present themselves as enemies. Sometimes they’re publicly celebrating you while privately searching for reasons to minimize you. Pay attention to the unnecessary jokes, backhanded compliments, and subtle satisfaction when they discover you’re not perfect.

This doesn’t mean you should become suspicious of everyone or afraid of genuine connection. It means you need discernment. Someone sharing their secrets with you doesn’t automatically mean they’ve earned access to yours.

Listen. Observe. Allow trust to develop through consistency, not just conversation. Because being interested in your life and being invested in your well-being are two very different things.

I unpack these subtle relational dynamics in my book, The Mean Girl Manual: She Don’t Like You and That’s OK. If you’ve ever struggled to understand why someone could admire you and secretly compete with you, this book is for you.

Hard copies available now on my website! Link in bio.

Have you ever realized someone wanted information about you more than they actually wanted friendship with you?

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