jaylyn🦋

Sept 26 2022 -
Started out as a regular Monday for me, class, practice, eating, shower, & hanging out at the dorm. Me and Bre were with some of our teammates in their room when I started getting messages from my mom saying the police knocked on her door and told her to get to the hospital, something happened with Jordan. I called my dad to let him know to get to the hospital too.
My mom arrived at the hospital and they told her to give them a few more minutes, so she sat down. After about 25 mins my mom messages me saying they brought her to a room in the back and said they’ll come back with an update shortly.
SN: my best friend, Bre, her brother passed the year before. So me and my mom previously had a conversation about what she would do if one of our family members passed while I was gone away to college and she said she would tell me I need to drive home, be safe, and that she loves me.
And then I received this message…
My heart sank.. like wym Jordan’s gone? My dad called, I’ll never forget his voice and he said “he gone Jaylyn.” A 3 hour drive home, with Bre in my passenger. Lord knows I probably traumatized my friend, she saw a side of me I’d never saw myself and I’m not even gonna get into all of that.
Ultimately I want to say that it doesn’t get better…. This was the most traumatic day of my life; watching my family change, them going through depression, anxiety, anger, grief…
I learned that there are many little things that become triggers after death happens. Things like movies with murder scenes, ambulances, late night unexpected phone calls, driving by myself at night, certain songs, being alone, and the holidays…
It’s so weird continuing to become an adult and continuing to hit different milestones in life bc my brother was only a year younger than me so I’ve always gotten to watch him do the things I did within the next year like becoming a teenager, turning 16, prom, you had the rest of your life ahead of you, but you were taken from us before you got the chance to live 😔 I’m so sorry this happened to you, I’ll forever miss you. I love you bro forever and always your big sis ♾️❤️‍🩹 #LLJ