3 months ago
3
4
Posted On: August 3rd 2026, 10:00 pm
Our automatic thoughts arise so quickly that we don’t always think to question them.
“If they would just…. I wouldn’t have to feel this way” is one of my default beliefs. Mostly with my boyfriend and family tbh. When life gets stressful, our brain scrambles to make us feel better.
Turning towards a loved one for comfort to feel better is natural!
The problem arises when what we desire isn’t always available. My default is to be upset with the other person and then I feel worse, rejected.
The reality though is that it isn’t his responsibility to “fix” my feelings, it’s mine. And just because it doesn’t align today doesn’t mean he doesn’t care or want me to feel better (even when the wounded part sees it that way).
So now I notice my thoughts in those moments. I pause to actually feel what’s coming up instead of rushing to blame. I use touch, I journal, I cry. I validate my feelings, even when it’s uncomfortable.
Because honestly, I only have two options here… Stay stuck in the resentment (which never actually helps), or feel it all the way through to the other side.
This is the process of healing.
What are your default beliefs? 🤍👇🏼💬
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#highlysensitiveperson #sensitiveperson #feelingdeep #emotionalmaturity #therapytips
“If they would just…. I wouldn’t have to feel this way” is one of my default beliefs. Mostly with my boyfriend and family tbh. When life gets stressful, our brain scrambles to make us feel better.
Turning towards a loved one for comfort to feel better is natural!
The problem arises when what we desire isn’t always available. My default is to be upset with the other person and then I feel worse, rejected.
The reality though is that it isn’t his responsibility to “fix” my feelings, it’s mine. And just because it doesn’t align today doesn’t mean he doesn’t care or want me to feel better (even when the wounded part sees it that way).
So now I notice my thoughts in those moments. I pause to actually feel what’s coming up instead of rushing to blame. I use touch, I journal, I cry. I validate my feelings, even when it’s uncomfortable.
Because honestly, I only have two options here… Stay stuck in the resentment (which never actually helps), or feel it all the way through to the other side.
This is the process of healing.
What are your default beliefs? 🤍👇🏼💬
•
•
•
#highlysensitiveperson #sensitiveperson #feelingdeep #emotionalmaturity #therapytips
Comments (4)
3 months agocounselingcoaching_withmaya
Default belief they have the power to "stop my bleeding" when I feel wounded I often want them to stop the bleeding.. it's up to me to notice and acknowledge the wound and use.my coping skills (emotional tourniquet) to stop the bleeding. It doesn't mean I can't assert myself and tell them about the pain but I have to make sure not to give them the sole power to stop the pain and bleeding.. It's sacred when we heal Self.
3 months agoalexandrias.highlight.reel
Another of my default beliefs is “it shouldn’t be this haaaaard” 😩😩
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