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Shafi Sabi

@sabi235320

25 days ago

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Posted On: October 9th 2026, 05:39 pm

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kalalchhabi

3 days ago

kalalchhabi

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Anyone else notice how easily a woman’s valid reaction can be dismissed by calling her hysterical or crazy? It feels like a quick way to make a woman shrink, doubt herself and ignore her own boundaries.

Whenever a man says his girlfriend is crazy, I wonder what happened and why everyone focuses on her reaction instead. The “crazy ex-girlfriend” trope helps men avoid accountability, while making women think twice about speaking up or holding boundaries.

The history behind “hysterical” is dark. It comes from hystera, the Greek word for womb. For centuries, doctors believed the womb could cause illness. In 1859, one physician claimed that a quarter of the women he studied in Paris hospitals suffered from hysteria, a diagnosis broad enough to cover women’s pain and distress. How convenient that women could be labelled irrational or unwell just as they began to challenge the limits placed on their lives.

Elizabeth Packard’s story has stayed with me. In 1860, her husband had her committed to an asylum after she expressed views he disagreed with, including her opposition to slavery. She spent three years there before fighting to prove her sanity, then campaigned for the rights of married women and people confined in asylums. Women were locked away, subjected to invasive treatments, and had their opinions treated as proof that something was wrong with them.

The “crazy ex” trope feels like a form of patriarchal gaslighting when you consider that leaving a male partner can be one of the most dangerous times for a woman, yet women are still dismissed as crazy when their emotions might be telling them something important. We learn to distrust our reactions and make ourselves smaller rather than risk being labelled hysterical.

It’s my biggest ick when I hear people use “hysterical” or “crazy” to brush off a woman. I’m loving this series and have really enjoyed all your messages. Once you learn the history behind phrases embedded in everyday language, it’s hard not to hear them differently. For me, these words bring to mind the devastating oppression women have faced throughout history. What word or phrase should I tackle next? ❤️

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