Angela Le Londonite

Abusers are the "nice" guy (at least superficially) in the vast majority of cases. Which is how a.) their victim managed to be sucked into a long term relationship with them in the first place, and b.) how they get away with it for so long. They are hard at first to identify, and their methods are often covert and insidious, and involved DARVO, which is deceptive narrative switching at the victim's expense, and a deflection tactic deployed when the perpetrator's narcissistic traits are too high for them to even take accountability or self reflect. The narcissistic ego creates their own delusional false narrative, which they tell everyone, which runs alongside the real, factual narrative, and is all designed in their own minds to avoid accountability and shift blame back to their victim.

Flying monkeys who fail to do their own due diligence, who fail to scrutinise the situation with eyes of discernment nor ask the hard questions, can get sucked into the narc's manipulative DARVO tactics which involve playing the victim instead of owning being the perpetrator. So before you know it, you are being attacked not just by the original liar, but their flying monkeys also 🐒 🪽

The whole "bait n switch" tends to happen when the abuser is settled into the relationship and knows his victim is trapped or tied into them in some way. Then the breadcrumbing, taking for granted and escalating disrespect starts and transgresses into worse types of abuse over time.

Because these terms are so undefined and uncharacterised by the systems meant to protect from family violence, the perpetrator is well aware of this, and they use this route of harrassment and abuse to fly under the radar or being officially flagged by the system. It is nonetheless, highly abusive, deceptive and harmful to the victim experiencing it. It is lack of accountability on steroids.

#familyviolenceawareness #domesticviolence #coercivecontrol #covertnarcissisticabuse #emotionalabuse