Regina Sloan | Mindset & Emotional Coach |

Lesson 2: Punishment does not work.

I was a hell raiser for the first part of our marriage.

If he did not behave the way I wanted him to, I gave the cold shoulder, spoke rudely, and was childish in many ways.

We have been taught since childhood that punishment gets people to behave the way we think they should.

We were whooped.
Put on punishment.
Things taken away.
Experiences withheld.

Our behavior was controlled in many ways. And I took those beliefs straight into my marriage.

It does not work for what we actually want, ladies.

It does not create more connection, more love, or more closeness. It causes people to shut down, hide who they really are, build resentment, or walk on eggshells just to appease you.

None of that creates lightness.

I do not need to punish another person in any way. I do not need to behave childishly to get my point across. I do not need to stonewall or send mixed messages to be heard.

Relationships can be simple. Clear communication and boundaries can be simple. They strengthen your bond, not break it.

And if you are reading this recognizing yourself, that is not a character flaw. It is a pattern you learned. And patterns can change.

Punishment never fixes a problem. Love, honesty, and boundaries do.

I have since learned that I do not want to be in a relationship where punishment steers the car. What drives us is mutual partnership, a shared want for closeness, and respect for each other.

That is what I want for you too.

10 until 10. 10 lessons. 10 days. Follow along.