I understand why some people resist it.
They think healing means there’s a finish line to our grief…like there’s a way to “get over”their loss, moving on, or loving their person less.
But after 30 years as a therapist, working with thousands of grievers, and losing both my parents and my son Sammy, I see it differently.
I will grieve Sammy for the rest of my life. But I also want to keep growing, finding joy, deepening my connection with him, and expanding my life around that grief.
We never stop learning, growing, or healing as human beings. Why should grief be any different?
I don't expect to ever be healed from losing Sammy. But I sure as hell hope I never stop healing.
What do you think? Does the word “healing” bother you?
#GriefHealing #LifeAfterLoss #CryingOutLoud #GrievingMother
3 days agorozy288
I like the message but really didn’t like the music 🎶, it wasn’t needed & it was kind of depressing music . I’m grieving the love of my life for 17 months now. After 23 years he died suddenly & was my whole world 🌎 & my rock 🪨 . I’m physically & mentally unwell since it happened. I self isolate & my GI Illnesses are chronic & tenfold now . Insomnia, chronic fatigue, depression, panic attacks. In therapy 16 months weekly . Live alone , don’t drive .. just turned 65 . Used to look 55 but I don’t care much anymore because I’m alone sick & just with my dog 90 percent of time . My married grown kids and grandbabies don’t live far now that I had to move closer & sell our beautiful big home on pond 2 hrs away in 4 weeks ! I want to do things but , I can barely eat & I’m always sick . I tried all diff meds for that last 11 years, and even now & anti depressants ( have tried many & on one bone but no help ). Anxiety med low dose . Makes me more tired . FM Dr $$$$ has had me on so many different supplements & some meds . Nothing helps . It’s more than grief which is overwhelming itself . Half my life is I packed in boxes. 📦 in 2 car garage 16 months. Can’t fit in here . I pay 3 x for lease then my mortgage payment too . It’s sooo expensive but a safe gated community & has a fenced small private yard with some grass for dog & patio . I’m so confused on what to do & I’m so tired & sick 🤢 feeling 24/7 .
3 days agoinmyheartalways25
They're afraid to say they're healing as its saying your over the loss of them and i understand that. We dont need to say anything, no label on our grief as we never heal completely, we just need to feel our own feelings in each day we live because it really is day by day forever. 3 yrs in and if anyone asks I just say today is an ok day and some days are really good days and others I say nope, its a terrible day and I know ill still be saying that 70.
3 days agopourlair_jocelynfortier
You don’t heal from grief. You live with it and learn how to make it your companion.
3 days agofelicity.shines
Maybe the word is “evolving” rather than healing from my experience from the death of my son. I think when it comes to the death of a child, we evolve rather than heal in the conventional sense. Because healing often implies that something broken can be repaired, that we can return to a previous state of wholeness. But when you lose a child, there is no returning to the person you were before. Healing may happen around the trauma of the loss — the shock, the helplessness, the guilt, the fear, the nervous system's response to something incomprehensible. Grief itself doesn't necessarily need to be healed. Grief is a natural expression of love meeting absence. Evolution is what happens as we gradually integrate that love and loss into who we are becoming. We may develop a different relationship with life, death, compassion, meaning, and even ourselves. And wholeness becomes something different. Not a return to the old self, but the possibility of being whole while carrying an absence that will always matter.
3 days agofootypajamas
After a severe neurological disease, I’ve finally learned that I will never have closure. It’s harder to grieve when you’re stuck being alive.
3 days agoadventurewithjackgreen
Speaking of “healing”…. Where can I find a good therapist who specializes in child loss?
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