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Rutnie Teh

@rutnie89

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📍 Malaysia
🧠 Thoughts, feelings, and everything in between 🫀
💼 Analyst | FCCA + MBA

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🐍 36 to 37 🖤

A very black and red day. Well-fed and nicely sweetened 😏

Had a beefy, fab-licious birthday meal to celebrate. Thank you to the lovely team at @kyotoenen they totally surprised me and made it special 🥰

#birthday #wagyu #kyoto #japan #1989 by @rutnie89

🩷 feel

Hey Kyoto 🎌

The view on the way to Kyoto. Thought I could enjoy the ride, and I was wrong. But my friend and another kind soul checked on me and kept me company the whole time. That much I’m thankful ✨

Yes, I named it Velvet Worth 😏💋

I had the best experience here 💕 The ladies here were lovely, and accommodating and they truly helped shift my energy tremendously 🥰 (after some unpleasant experience, continue to swipe through to find out why).

@myonlyfragrance_teramachi thank you!

Entrance to.. wait for my future post 👻

It’s engraved with a Japanese character. If you can read it, you know what it says. Even if it’s not perfect, its true meaning is entirely mine 🖤

And due to the experience getting this ring, really had to tell myself “out of the shadow and into the light” 😉.

@glanta_kyoto_sanjokawramchi 🙃 This was the only place that made me feel like they wanted to say “take your ring and get out”.

As far as being accommodating, patient with customers, and being kind goes, in my personal experience, I would rate them 3 out of 5 stars.

I left their store feeling extremely disturbed, couldn’t enjoy having a new ring, until I walked into the next store, where I was greeted by the lovely team (previous slide).

But.. all is well, I love my ring still 🥰

Fooding 🥰😋

There were many days I went without coffee, just matcha 🍵 and they were obviously of great quality ☺️

Mandatory documentation of my matcha order 💚🇯🇵

Clean air, clean city, chill weather, very orderly crowd. There were multiple times I experienced waiting to cross the street, there were many people around, cars, etc. and it was complete silence and peace. 😌

Apparently I should not question the significance of this, and just take a pic for the sake of it.

Picture taken, still don’t get it.

Again, do not question the significance of these two pics ☺️

Of course my Gorgeousness recommends to me the best stuff, and I love it. Wish they have it in our 7-11!

Nijō Castle. One of the contributing factors of choosing Japan, I love being in historical and cultural places so Kyoto was it. Couldn’t take pics inside but here’s the surrounding garden. Definitely got me excited fo by @rutnie89

🖤 37

path redirects,
heart goes deep. by @rutnie89

🦂

My favourite month. And the final few weeks of this year (for me). I made sure to fill it with love, just me being a deep feeler, feeling deep feelings.

I spent a day with a lot of people from my childhood, representing my family, to say goodbye to a family member (gosh, tearing up as I type this). Nothing can take away the memories I have from those crucial first 10-plus years of my life. I said my thank yous and I love yous to some incredible friends. I stayed active as usual, and I got to spend some good quality time with a dear friend who has stood by me for over 16 years.

Truly, there were some major changes in just 3 weeks, but here is the bare minimum version in 15 slides.

🖤 by @rutnie89

🔮 Opalite month

The bestie is always the first to give me tiramisu during this time of the year. Out of all our meet-ups in recent years, today was honestly one of the happiest. Conversations were lit. All smiles, positive vibes, and tiramisu-like 🤎

#October #Bestie #Opalite by @rutnie89

September was golden 🥰

It was filled with dancing, workouts, laughter, catching up, good food, reading, journaling, important conversations, love from family and friends.

Thankfully, being home in Penang, I escaped the haze. Someone once said I seem to bring the rain when I head back here, and honestly, most trips that’s exactly what happens. A little magic 🩵🌧️

Some things happened this month that I never expected. They really solidified the reminder that I cannot (and should not) save up happiness. I have to feel it in the moment, otherwise I miss it. And feel it in the moment, I did, intensely. Between a reel going viral overnight and someone pointing out my accelerated inner growth, I’m learning that my self-expression never needed justifying. I know I will always fall short of society’s definition of a “good” life, but it was never measured by what I do, always by who I am.

Happiness doesn’t come easily. People say it’s a choice. Well, that feels almost impossible when I’m plagued by insomnia, overthinking things that are the exact opposite of happy. And yet, nothing is permanent, not even the worst feelings. I did eventually get some sleep and still got myself to an early morning workout a few hours later (don’t recommend it, it was brutal). Not hitting society’s “good life” checkpoints actually gives me the ultimate freedom to do so.

The biggest lesson? To get through heavy thoughts, I sat with them. Let them come. If it comes, it came for a reason. If it stays, it stays for a reason. If it hurts, it hurts for a reason.

But dang, nothing beats being with people who have seen literally every version of me. The ones who know me intimately, where I don’t have to hide or be “proper.” With them, I get the best kind of laughter. The best kind of button to press ✨

#PhotoDump #2026 by @rutnie89

🤎

A hot date that came with 4 hours conversation at a nice restaurant. Notice my big smile with the tiramisu 😁 by @rutnie89

🩵 precious

JTR, specially produced by @jessica_sf_n

Will continue to strength train to be able to cuddle and play with JTR.

#AuntieMode #Family #ObligatedLove🩸 by @rutnie89

🐍

Feeling and moving through music when I’m home alone is definitely why my nighttime routine gets delayed 😆 but when the movement needs to happen, you shouldn’t resist it!

@missyk_thedancedept got this song stuck in my head last night 🤭

#dance by @rutnie89

99 days to 2027 😈

There’s been clarity. There’s been confusion. A lot of thoughts, a lot of feelings, and I didn’t resist any of them. There were moments of overwhelm, moments of laughter, moments of overreaction, and a lot of other, moments. I sat with it all, like someone once told me to.

It reminds me of what Charles Xavier said to his younger self, that it’s not weakness, but a source of strength and hope 🩶

A lot of things going on. And almost nothing going on. And that’s the beauty of it, no one actually knows everything. You only ever see what someone chooses to show you 😏

#2026 #2027 by @rutnie89

🖤 that’s sweet

Dear Rutnie, the countdown begins, 33 days to 37. Apparently, the InBody says you weigh 45.4kg (however accurate that is).

Thanks to @bibi_gcsp you did a 35kg deadlift just 3 days ago. And thanks to @charissatch you did a 40kg deadlift today. Your body is intact, spine still there. Let that sink in.

#WorkoutMotivation by @rutnie89

In my mind, I’m walking with her hand-in hand around @parkroyalpenangresort 💗

Growing up as a little girl, my whole world was just Penang Island. I honestly thought the outside world didn’t exist, and that everything on TV was just a painted visual. To me, a “holiday” didn’t mean traveling to another state or country. It meant my dad driving us 45 minutes to Batu Ferringhi for a stay at Parkroyal.

Each time I see the Parkroyal sign, it brings back a huge wave of nostalgia. I spent the first 5 to 7 years of my life looking forward to this “holiday”. And us kids, we never needed a map, we knew every corner by heart. We knew where the elevators were, the pools, the pub, and where the “secret” elevator was (shoutout to my fellow Koko Nut Klubbers from the 90s 🤡🥥).

At night, while the adults were inside “Beers” (iykyk) watching Alleycats play music, us kids (not in bed) were right outside the glass wall. We were too young to enter (dang it), but it was perfect for the adults to watch over us while they had their fun inside. It was either that, or a hotel room was chosen so the adults could gather for their “shuffling” games 😏♠️ ♥️♣️♦️

Being back here 30 years later, I see everything through older eyes. I realise how much effort our parents put into planning these “holidays”, keeping their friendships alive, and raising their kids together. Back then, I only cared about my own fun. I now see how much joy it brought our parents just to see their kids happy, while getting to enjoy their own fun too.

It seems so simple, our parents just met up, brought the kids, had the same bonding games, and repeated it for many, many years.

Turned out to be my best memories of them all.

#ChildhoodMemories by @rutnie89