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Ryan Niederer

@ryaneedr

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Some people call me Putz. I call it personality. 💋
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🎃💀 Looks like the spirits weren’t the only ones clocking in today! 👻🖤 Glad I wasn’t the only one bringing a little Halloween chaos to the office. Just two souls trying to survive the workday… one spooky shift at a time. 🦋🔥💀 Corporate by day, creatures of the night by choice. 🕸️😈 by @ryaneedr
Well… this is a win. ❤️ This is the farthest I’ve walked on my own in a while. I still look like a cripple walking, but tonight I did it without a cane, crutch, or wheelchair. It felt really good to walk down this trail again. For a long time, it felt like I was standing still—just trying to get through each day and figure out what came next. Tonight gave me a little more hope and a little more confidence that things really are progressing, even if it’s slowly. Slowly but surely. One step at a time. One day at a time. I’m still on the road. And I’m still moving forward—with both the past behind me and the present in front of me. There’s still a long way to go, but tonight was a reminder that I am moving. 🌅 by @ryaneedr
For the past seven days, I’ve shown up and put in the work. The mission is simple, but brutal: rebuild my strength, rebuild my endurance, and get my body back. I wish I could say it’s getting easier. It isn’t. Progress is painfully slow, and some days the pain is overwhelming. Some days, just walking into the gym takes everything I have. But that crutch leaning against the wall is a daily reminder of exactly what I’m fighting against. And I refuse to let it define me. There are moments when I question how long this will take. But I’m still here. Still showing up. Still putting one foot in front of the other. One day at a time. I will persevere. Because this comeback is personal, not punishment. And I know it won’t be handed to me. It’s going to be earned. And I still have a lot of work to do. by @ryaneedr
I’m exhausted. 🥱 Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. The excitement of finally being home has worn off, and now my body is reminding me that healing is painful. My mind has been a circus 🤡, and my emotions feel like they’re jumping through rings of fire. This is a kind of pain and suffering I’ve never experienced before. I knew recovery would be difficult. I just didn’t realize how much energy it would take to adjust to a body that doesn’t move, feel, or function the way I remember it. Every day seems to require another adjustment. Another compromise. Another reminder that I’m not where I want to be yet. I look at myself in the mirror and see a broken soul on the mend. ❤️‍🩹 And honestly, some days it’s hard to accept the path I’m on. I want to feel strong again. I want to move without thinking about every step. I want to work out without feeling like I’m keeping myself on life support just to make it through the session. Maybe pain isn’t progress by itself. Maybe progress is choosing to keep moving through the pain. This is not the version of me I want to stay. It’s the version of me I’m working to leave behind. One painful, exhausting, imperfect day at a time. ❤️‍🩹 by @ryaneedr
🏠 Home. Today, I made it back home. 10 weeks of rehab. 10 weeks of learning, healing, struggling, adapting, and taking things one day at a time and tonight, I finally get to sleep in my own bed. I don’t think I can fully put into words what this feeling of relief means to me. There were days when getting to this moment felt so far away, and now I’m actually here. Home. I’m exhausted, grateful, humbled, and incredibly relieved. Tonight, I’m just grateful to be home. ❤️ Now we keep moving forward. 🖤 by @ryaneedr
Today, I got to come to my apartment for a little while longer. I did some laundry, made some dinner, and watched as much college football possible. And let me tell ya firsthand. There really is no place like home. Those few hours of normal life felt pretty special. They reminded me exactly what I’m working so hard to get back to. Until then, I’m literally taking one step at a time. One day at a time. Even when those steps are only baby steps. It’s hard to believe it’s already been 9 weeks since all of this began. Nine weeks of infection, pain, hospitals, surgeries, setbacks, physical therapy, and a whole lot of uncertainty about when I’ll finally feel like myself again. Lately, I’ve been putting most of my energy into recovery and challenging myself a little more with every physical therapy session. And today, I’m really excited to share a small victory I can finally stand on two feet, with both toes and both heels on the ground. I can even take a few baby steps with a crutch. They certainly aren’t pretty. A toddler has more grace than my lumpy little limp. Right now, I’m somewhere between a newborn giraffe learning how legs work and Igor from Hunchback of Nortre Dame. For the first time in a while, I genuinely feel like freedom is within reach. I can see that final turn. I can almost see the finish line. And even if I have to limp, crawl, sweat, or huff and puff my way there… I will get there. Because after everything I’ve been through, I’m not stopping now by @ryaneedr
Throwback to 17 years ago! 😂 If you know me, you already know I take Thanksgiving and Christmas very seriously. 🎄🦃 Here’s proof that Natalie and Raegin have apparently been running a 17-year holiday harassment campaign against me. Teaming up every year to push pre-Christmas festivities before I’m emotionally ready. 😂😂 Honestly, the sibling-friend alliance is strong, the Christmas chaos is eternal, and somehow I’m still outnumbered. Some things never change. ❤️ Thankfully I’ve got a few tricks up my sleeve for this year. 🤪 by @ryaneedr
I’M ALIVE. ❤️‍🩹🤪😂 Surgery was a success! 🙌🏼 While I was under anesthesia, they were able to manipulate and stretch my leg back into position without having to cut my knee open. Definitely not how I pictured my Tuesday, but I’ll take the win. Grateful. Relieved. Ready to heal. ❤️ by @ryaneedr
Recovery ❤️‍🩹 Update This week’s been a little quieter. Instead of chasing milestones, I’ve been focusing on what’s ahead and getting myself ready for my next surgery on Tuesday. The PICC line coming out was a huge win, and I’m incredibly grateful to be done with the IV antibiotics and infusions. At the same time, my knee continues to tighten despite all the stretching and PT, and that’s been difficult to accept. 😡 On Tuesday, I’ll be heading back into surgery, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous. I feel prepared, but the part that weighs on me isn’t necessarily the surgery itself, it’s the unknown. I don’t know what they’ll find when they get inside my knee, or how much damage the infection may have left behind in the joint, cartilage, or surrounding tissue. I know recovery will take time, and I’ve made peace with that. I’m learning to trust the healing process. I’ve accepted to let the process happen even if it’s not what I had originally planned for. Somehow, I’ve also gotten pretty comfortable with this whole “luxury prison” lifestyle, which is a sentence I never thought I’d say seriously. The staff here has made a huge difference, too. They’ve been incredible, and apparently I’ve become somewhat of a popular resident around here. There are definitely some perks to that… although I’m learning that popularity comes at a price, and apparently that price is privacy. 😂 But really, I’m thankful. Thankful to still be here. ❤️‍🩹 I’m thankful for the cards, dinners, prayers, visits, messages, and random acts of kindness have carried me through some very difficult days. I’ve been spoiled by the love and support I’ve received, and I don’t take any of it for granted. So here’s to one more surgery, one more hurdle, and hopefully the beginning of the next chapter. Who knows what Tuesday will bring or what the recovery will look like after that. I guess we’ll find out when we get there. Thank you all for continuing to cheer me on. ❤️ by @ryaneedr
Recovery update ❤️‍🩹 I sat down to write this week’s update and, if I’m honest, this wasn’t the one I wanted to share. I’ve been giving everything I have to PT. All the torturing stretches, painful reps, and all the work it takes to get back on my feet. This week, I found out I’ll need another surgery because of scar tissue. If I’m being honest… hearing that news devastated me. I thought I was getting close to taking those first steps again. I thought I was further along than I actually was. Realizing there’s another mountain to climb has been hard to accept. But this journey keeps teaching me patience in ways I never would have chosen. Recovery keeps teaching me to adjust. Everything takes longer now. Car rides, showers, getting in and out of places, even spending time with family and friends. Things I once did without thinking now require planning, patience, and a little more help. Yet even this week held a win. For the first time since all of this began, I slept through the entire night without waking up in pain or needing medication. It may seem small, but to me, it felt like hope. I realized that I’ve still got a ways to go and I’m gonna be here a while so I might as well get ready and stay comfortable. I’ll keep showing up for surgery, for PT, and because my hope is stronger than my fear. This path is longer than I ever imagined, and I’m learning to accept that I can’t control the timeline. It might not be today, or even as soon as I hoped, but I believe there will come a day when I’m standing on my own two feet again. And when that day comes, I’ll know exactly how much it took to get there. by @ryaneedr
I’m still standing, better than I ever was.” Taking it one day at a time. Taking it one day, one step, and one milestone at a time. by @ryaneedr
A little rehab jailbreak ⛓️‍💥 with my favorite people. 🤟🏼 Got to break out of rehab for dinner with my parents and Gabi — my biggest supporters and honestly the best care team I could ask for. 🥰 It felt so good to get out, laugh, tell stories, be a little sassy 😂, and just spend some normal time together. Going out in public can still make me a little nervous, especially rolling around in my hot wheels 🛞🧑‍🦽😂. People definitely stare, but I’m learning not to care. Getting out and doing normal things like this has actually helped me feel more like myself again. Very grateful for these people, this night, and the little moments that make life feel normal. ❤️ by @ryaneedr

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