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Sarah Min | 민향나

@sarahxmin

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🇰🇷🇺🇸 //📍on a solo grief trip around the world
🌱 philly 🪴 MSEd, MSW 🌿 healing for collective liberation

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Interview for @6abcactionnews “Building It Better Together Town Hall: Take Action Against Hate for Asian Americans” // I tried my best to fit what I could in 2 minutes... there’s too much to feel and say. please support the local community orgs I mentioned who are doing the work: @vietlead, @asianamericansunited, @wooricenter, @cambodian.association, @pejuangcoalition, @apipennsylvania, @apalaphilly. sending love to all as we grieve... 💔 #StopAsianHate #EndWhiteSupremacy by @sarahxmin

On Friday, January 22nd, Andrew and I said goodbye to our irreplaceable father, our world, next to his bedside in the ICU. 38 days in the hospital, with 27 of those days unconscious on the ventilator... that’s how long he fought COVID-19. Thank you to those who have been praying and rooting for him.

We intentionally chose hope, daily, for over a month. So this is all more than hard, it’s disheartening. Heartbreaking, gut-wrenching, devastating. Beyond infuriating and traumatizing. I woke up to a call from the doctor that morning, rushed to the hospital by 6am, and held my dad until he took his last breath around 1:30pm. The policy is a strict one-time 2-hour visit for one person, so I had to speak up for the both of us to be granted 8 hours for our last day with him. It’s appalling and horrifying that this is the nightmare millions of families are living in.

My dad is more than amazing. He was an extraordinary human who radiated positive energy. And damn, he was such a good dad. Absolutely killed the single father game. Everyone knew his love for us was incomparable. Our bond was inexplicable. There’s really no one like my dad. His impact was felt by every single person who met him.

His consistent ability to make any and every one of my friends feel genuinely cared for and loved, his desire to make any and every person laugh and feel comfortable, his effort to make any and every meal he prepares unforgettable, his gift to make any and every song he sings his own melody, his passion to make any and every poem he writes a work of art... all of my favorite, the most admirable parts of him... all suddenly robbed from me.

My dad taught me to dream big, saying “꿈을 항상 크게 꿔.” He taught me to find gratitude in ordinary life, saying “향나야... 인생이라는게 별것도 아니야. 그냥 감사하고 사는거야.” He taught me to broaden my perspective, saying “쫍게 생각하지말고 쫌더 넓게 생각해봐.” He taught me to pause and appreciate the beauty around me, saying “ 날씨가 어떻게 이렇게 좋을수가있니? 이 꽃 좀 봐라. 너무 예쁘지 않아?”

He had such a precious soul, and I know his spirit is eternal. But my God, he shouldn’t have been taken away so soon. We lost a bright light in this world. Please continue to pray for us. I will never understand this. by @sarahxmin

Hiking on a mountain + making a music video with friends = the ultimate dopamine combo by @sarahxmin

Dominated Mt Rainier Skyline (we died) by @sarahxmin

I’m not cute anymore ✨ by @sarahxmin

Euro summer is always a good idea 😜 by @sarahxmin

We JJAN’d our way through Europe. We lived 100 lives in one day and Hannah Montana’d it multiple times in Portugal, Spain and Italy. Thank you Sarah for bringing me as your plus one, what a way to kickstart our summer! 🤣😂 To my bestie and her family, thank you for bringing me back 24 years to my childhood days. Reliving old memories like making homemade pasta is such a full circle moment because Emma is at the age Gabby was when I first met her 😭 I will forever remember this trip! More photos and videos to come soon by @sarahxmin

i moved a couple months ago. it’s been a season of many changes and trying to start many things over. resetting and slowly settling into my new home has been hard, but good 🥲 by @sarahxmin

italy pt. 1 // started our trip with the sweetest stay in the quiet village of #corniglia 🇮🇹 #cinqueterre #visititaly by @sarahxmin

rest in paradise, 할아버지 💔🕊 i can’t believe it’s been a week since we lost you… i can’t believe we were just on facetime like this a month ago. i promised you a visit soon since it’s been so long… i’m so sorry.

one of my favorite calls with you last summer was on june 28, 2021… i journaled about it after we hung up because i was reminded of how much i missed you. i’ve been replaying your words from that call over and over again in my mind… to remember the firm yet gentleness in your voice when you told me: “향나는… 마음이 착해서… 사람들이 향나를 만나고 나서… 너를 놓치지 않으려고 할거야… 할아버지가 너무 잘 알지…” 🥹

i’ll never forget all of our trips to kmart across the street from you, learning to swim at your community pool, and falling off the canoe in that mysterious river (which we ALWAYS laughed about). thank you for all the ways you loved and prayed for me. until we meet again… i’ll try to find comfort imagining you smiling down on me just like this. 사랑해요 할아버지. 너무 보고싶어요. 미안해요. 🤍 할아버지의 하나밖에 없는 손녀딸 향나가 by @sarahxmin

turned 30 yesterday! 💫 thank you for all the birthday love 🥰

spent the day celebrating with my family for the last time at dad’s house, before preparing my heart to sell it. admiring the new spring blossoms right outside, remembering how my dad would always say that they were indicating my birthday is here. soaking in the sun in the backyard he spent so much time in. being treated to a mani and pedi date by a dear sister friend. devouring the most delicious food made by precious aunt sue, as always. enjoying the drinks and decorations from my brother and future sister in law. scream-singing and dancing for hours doing karaoke in the basement, something my dad and i loved doing together regularly. just having so much fun and enjoying last family moments in our home.

i think my dad’s absence on my birthday will hit me harder every year. but we really honored him this year — we drank a lot, laughed a lot, sang a lot. all my love and gratitude goes out to my community who have walked beside me intimately this past year. thank you for helping me stay alive! 🖤🖤🖤 by @sarahxmin

dancing was one of my first passions since early childhood. michelle and carolyn were friends i started dancing with from 3rd to 12th grade. all the talent shows from elementary to high school at school, local churches, and pep rallies. we found so much joy in the late night practices and adrenaline rushes from the stage. we just had so much fun doing it.

my dad wouldn’t let me take dance classes since he was scared i’d wanna pursue it as a career so i became a school cheerleader to find any excuse to dance. then i went off to college and joined two dance teams so i could have dance practice almost every night. then once i graduated, i never danced again because i got too consumed with work and grad school. i felt too overwhelmed by life to enjoy hobbies. i forgot what it felt like to make time for me.

it’s been 8 YEARS since i danced. i’ve been telling myself for years that i wanna start dancing again and i just couldn’t find the energy or courage to start. but after this past year of intensely grieving my dad and older versions of myself, something within me clicked recently to make small changes.

so i just started taking dance classes with michelle a couple weeks ago. and damn, I’M SO RUSTY AND I’M HAVING SO MUCH FUN. yay to reconnecting with old hobbies and slowly getting my shit together. 💃🏻 by @sarahxmin