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Serena 💖

@serenastampfer

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40-something geeky riot grrl & woke snowflake / Domestic abuse survivor / Living with BPD / Single mum of autistic teenager / York Green Party member

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I've been debating whether or not to share this right now, but I have found that writing in my Substack this week has been really helpful in processing my emotions. I think it *feels* disrespectful to talk about someone who just died, but in this case the person who died was my abuser, not just my son's dad.

I'm not going to hide my feelings, because they are valid, and I'm obviously unable to express them at home, so my personal corner of the internet is the right place to do it. I've already had positive reactions from my current subscribers, and a lot of what I'm writing about could help other people.

So, please take a look at https://serenastampfer.substack.com (link in bio) and especially my most recent posts. If you are interested in my other domestic abuse experiences and musings, they are all labelled "Him". I hope that I can provide some insight into the lived experience of a survivor of abuse and coercive control, more specifically, someone who has a child with their abuser.

🩷

#domesticabuseawareness #domesticabusesurvivor #vawg #domesticviolenceawareness #survivorstories by @serenastampfer

Grimothy Reaper! Leave some sweets for everyone else!

Happy Halloween and big thanks to @jaysillence of @inkblotfilms @danny_california2020 @serenastampfer, Max, and @jareldinio for bringing this together!

Link to crowdfunder in bio! by @serenastampfer

Halloween flashback to when I took the kids Trick 'r Treating, dressed as Sam from Trick 'r Treat. I was very happy to get a like on Twitter from @instamikedougherty too!

I made this myself from scratch, except that I modified a pumpkin onesie from Primark. The head wasn't quite right, but it worked at short notice.

🎃🍭

#trickrtreat #trickrtreatsam #trickrtreatcosplay by @serenastampfer

This has genuinely knocked me for six.

I didn't watch Star Trek until a few years ago, so to me he was Professor Charles Xavier, first and foremost. But I mostly knew him for his presence in the media, always speaking out and standing up for good causes. He was an ally to all those who needed one; particularly the LGBTQIA+ community, and women survivors and victims of abuse.

My impression of him was that he was intelligent, talented, and very funny. Most people don't know, but for about 18 years, I've not been able to get to sleep without having repetitive cartoons on as background noise; things I've seen a bajillion times before. I've switched these around depending on what's easily available for me, but for the last few years it has solely been American Dad and Family Guy. Sir Patrick was the voice of Avery Bullock, Stan's boss, in the former, and several characters, including a cartoon version of himself, in Family Guy. So I've gone to sleep hundreds and hundreds of times while hearing his voice, amongst others. I think that's why he felt so omnipresent to me. He also seemed ageless and immortal.

I had no idea that this would hit me so hard. Rest In Peace, Sir Patrick. And, make it so.

🖖🏻 by @serenastampfer

Soppy post alert: Today marks 10 years of Facebook friendship for me and @jaysillence! We met when his band was supporting @handsoffgretel in York, and later discovered our mutual interest in Jurassic Park and dinosaurs 🦕🦖

Over the years since, he has become the friend that I trust the most, as he listens without judgement, or with judgement, but also kindness. And a lot of sarcasm and jokes. He has trusted me to help with @inkblotfilms and other endeavours, been a role model for Max at times (which I know he will laugh at), a therapist/shoulder to cry on for me, someone who doesn't run away when my crazy comes out (even the time when the crazy got REALLY crazy, and he probably should have), he's always been in my corner, he even came on holiday with my family, for my brother's wedding, we have been to so many dinosaur events, and as you can see, he almost always wears a JP t-shirt when we are out 😂

We don't hang out as regularly as we did before 2020, mainly because we both became hermits, then I had Max/other issues, while he had work. But when we do, we never have enough time, because we both can't stop talking at, and over, each other allll the time. He is probably going to hate that I'm posting this, but tough! I promise I won't do it again until we get to 20 years (although the world will probably have ended by then).

Anyway. Yay for Jay! by @serenastampfer

Proof that I left the house! Blue skies, cool winds, falling leaves...I love autumn 🍁🌰🍂 by @serenastampfer

Feeling very autumnal today. And I'm actually leaving the house! (Ok, because I need to pick up my prescription, but still)

Lipstick: 'Smooch' Magic Metallic Liquid Lipstick by @ve_cosmetics by @serenastampfer

These ladies were fantastic too! Their whole act was incredible.

@russellscircus

#russellscircus #russellsinternationalcircus by @serenastampfer

Spinning fiery hoops on a tall unicycle!

@russellscircus

#russellscircus #russellsinternationalcircus #unicycletricks by @serenastampfer

My absolute favourite act at @russellscircus was the Valkyries! They were so good, and it looked so much fun!

#russellscircus #russellsinternationalcircus #thevalkyries by @serenastampfer

More aerial fun from @russellscircus!

#russellscircus #russellsinternationalcircus #aerialacrobat by @serenastampfer

Beautiful aerial performer at @russellscircus, I didn't catch her name but I'll look it up and edit this if I find her.

#russellscircus #russellsinternationalcircus #aerialacrobat by @serenastampfer