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idk

@seulpum99

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when @kippum99 isn’t just kippum (joyful)
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⠀ I generally dislike “what’s your favorite _____” questions
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“What’s your favorite color?”
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I started answering “white”, perhaps to give an answer as frustrating as the question is to me
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... ⠀ 
White 𝙞𝙨 my favorite color
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It’s everything and nothing at the same time
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Just like black by @seulpum99
Hi I’m back, just two years older. Exactly two years in fact. Something strongly called me back here yesterday early morning, while stuck in the not-so-unusual state of being unable to sleep for hours until the sunrise—trying to cry myself to sleep, repeating getting in and out of bed, wondering if taking melatonin would have made things different, asking myself if I should have just been up working drinking more caffeine or losing some ranked games instead, using the unhelpfully hyperactive brain to get boring life tasks done, toggling on and off and through different music as if the music or the silence were at fault ... I checked the account creation date; the coincidence is quite crazy I couldn’t help but convince myself to do this by the end of today, but decided to sleep on it first. ... Clearly there’s an unfinished story to be told here. tl;dr: I’m going public; feel free to remove any existing likes since this was meant to be a very private space. I’m going to remove all followers. Feel free to follow again after. I appreciate you so so much. Thank you for convincing me that a safe space exists, and allowing me to see the full beauty of life and the world again. by @seulpum99
this state is pretty lit ill give meditation another chance at some point by @seulpum99
loneliness where vibrant visual and auditory stimuli feel muted where i feel like a ghost walking through a world of happy people while walking in between incoming flocks of people with an uncanny look myself where i feel like the only one not smiling or talking or busy where i feel drawn to dark alleys to hide where i feel no emotions where pain becomes numb where im wandering without knowing where im going where im just looking for a place to run away to be truly alone by @seulpum99
“alone after all” by @seulpum99
this illustration is not mine but i resonate with it i was initially looking for an image with tangled things because i feel like right now my life is a fucking mess that feels like a bunch of different cords tangled together, and im just trying to untangle one at a time initially it felt like they were all tangled in a way that none of the problems were solvable because they prevented each other from being solved (like deadlock in computer science) but while focusing on small victories (one tiny knot on a single cord untangled), i think i can see each cord being untangled from the ball of the tangled mess one by one still work in progress, but i think i know which cords to start untangling first it might be possible to focus on completely untangling and pulling out a whole cord from the ball sometimes, but other times you make a lot of what you think is a progress that ends up tangling things more. other times you make a lot of progress on untangling one cord but then get stuck at which point you have to focus on untangling another part of the ball. i really liked untangling literal tangled wires as a child and would purposely tangle wired earbuds together just to untangle them for fun so lets think of this as a fun hobby im doing because i tangled things on purpose myself by @seulpum99
actual day 1 in korea (since i wasted all of yesterday on crying) - it is a weird feeling and i dont have time to write an essay to capture everything i feel right now being back here where i grew up for the first time in four years with friends ive wanted to show korea to for so long this is a transportation safety institute with a large sign that says “if you lower the speed you will see people” this caught my attention because i also noticed that if we slow down the pace at work or in life, we also start to see people by @seulpum99
toxic hierarchy vs supportive leadership by @seulpum99

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