#escapeplan
Here are three of the digital safety habits that helped me escape:
1️⃣ Create a spamy looking email folder and route any escape related replies there
2️⃣ Manually delete search history for specific sites instead of wiping everything (a totally empty history looks suspicious).
3️⃣ Check auto-suggest in your browser search bar; go through the alphabet and delete anything that could expose what you’re researching.
I used these at least once a day, every day, from now until my escape was done.
Follow for more tips on how to get out safely, and for the rest of my Escape Plan.
#escapeplan #digitalsafety #coercivecontrol #leavingabuse #survivorsupport
Quick Escape Plan update for the many new folks who joined during Escalation Week 🥰
This series is a real-time retelling of my seven-month escape from abuse; sometimes that means the steps come quickly, and sometimes… not.
The story will continue, just at a pace that matches the progress I was making back then.
Follow @HealingbytheNumbers for more steps of Escape Plan.
#escapeplan #thatwasabuse #coercivecontrol #emotionalabuse #survivorstory
The single most important step in escape isn’t logistical.
It’s emotional.
You can KNOW you should leave. You can even start taking steps.
But there’s a moment where your hope for them truly dies, and when it does, you become a fighter.
Note that even after MONTHS of planning, finances were still my number one concern.
The Healing by the Numbers Scholarship Fund exists to help survivors access support and resources when money is a barrier.
Comment or DM “SUPPORT” to donate OR apply.
And follow @healingbythenumbers to see how this step changed my entire Escape Plan.
#escapeplan
#financialabuse
#coercivecontrol
#emotionalabuse
#survivorsupport
Almost everyone who tries to leave an abusive relationship hits this point.
The point where you look at the risk, the fear, the stress, and think: I can’t possibly pull this off.
To be honest, after the credit card disaster I wanted to quit.
Put my clothes back, close my account, pretend none of this had happened.
I was overwhelmed, embarrassed, exhausted.
The only thing I couldn’t undo were the allotments. And THAT became the thing that kept me moving forward (however reluctantly).
If you’ve left a bad relationship but feel stuck in the “maybe I should just go back” phase…
…I think it’s time you stopped listening to that voice (THEIR voice) and start hearing your own again.
🙋♀️ Comment or DM me “READY” to learn more about “Rewrite the Rules”
🫶 And follow @Healingbythenumbers for the rest of Escape Plan.
#escapeplan #thatwasabuse #coercivecontrol #emotionalabuse leavingabuse
With abusive relationships, there comes a point where the fear is still there, the control is still there, but the love is gone.
What I’m about to share is the moment I stopped loving him. And that kind of loss hurts like grief.
Follow @HealingByTheNumbers for the next steps in Escape Plan this week.
#escapeplan #thatwasabuse #coercivecontrol #healingafterabuse #survivorsupport
Getting ready to tell you about the week shit got real.
Follow along 3/9-3/13 @healingbythenumbers
#escapeplan #leavingabuse #healingjourney #survivorstories #narcissisticabuse
Two-factor authentication has changed everything.
If you’re trying to get the logins you need when planning your escape, note that passwords are NOT enough.
Here’s how to keep yourself safe:
✅ Assume two-factor is turned on EVERYWHERE
✅ Know where those codes are being sent
✅ Expect alerts too, not just codes
Most importantly:
❌ Do NOT test things casually.
Every login attempt is a risk. One alert to the wrong device and your entire plan could be exposed.
Be smart, be strategic, be safe.
And follow @healingbythenumbers for the rest of escape plan.
#abusesurvivor #leavingabuse #digitalsafety #financialabuse #escapeplan
With abusive relationships, there comes a point where the fear is still there, the control is still there, but the love is gone.
What I’m about to share is the moment I stopped loving him.
�And that kind of loss hurts like grief.
Follow @HealingByTheNumbers for the next steps in Escape Plan this week.
#escapeplan #thatwasabuse #coercivecontrol #healingafterabuse #survivorsupport
At the time, this felt like a turning point, and that maybe life was settling down.
✅ My dad was recovering.
✅ I got a weekend off
✅ I got to go home for the first time in weeks!
But sometimes things get better RIGHT before they get catastrophically worse.
This weekend I let my guard down, and what happened changed everything in a way I could never undo.
Follow @HealingbytheNumbers for the next step in Escape Plan: the moment our marriage truly died.
#escapeplan #healingjourney #emotionalabuse #coercivecontrol #survivorstory
Not all control looks like yelling or threats. Sometimes it looks like…
❌ Not being “allowed” to leave
❌ Not being “able” to show up
❌ Not being free to help the people you love, even in a crisis.
One of the most painful parts of abuse is how it cuts you off from your own support system.
Over time, you start to believe that being trapped is just your reailty.
Follow @Healingbythenumbers to see how the rest of the week went in my Escape Plan.
#escapeplan #thatwasabuse #coercivecontrol #emotionalabuse #survivorsupport
