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Ruby Smith

@03rubylee

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#blacklivesmatter✊🏽✊🏾✊🏿
✨Currently✨: Creating the life I want☀️🎧
God✝ 23♋

POSTS STORIES REELS

I just made this...
So, where the hell is my ✨Nobel Prize in literature✨,
huh?🤨 I've earned it! I swear I have✋🏾😖 lol.

I found out about "theia" a few months ago
(Had no idea about it. If it's common knowledge,
Well then I'm commonly dumb, I guess💀),
But I knew then that saving it for later was best
considering I felt so much internal turmoil/change😶

I still have no idea what I'm doing💀,
But I've learned that whatever I'm doing,
Is something only I can really do (or would want to😭).
And that's something, I hope😅

I hope everyone can be #free, full of #whimsy and #happy 😌
(We need to bring hashtags back🙂‍↕️
Make Instagram #Instagram again🧢 haha)

Okay, that's it.
And as always, you're welcome😇
Thanks for coming to my zoom powerpoint meeting😂
Hope you're full of #hopecore ☀️
Take care! Until next timeeee✌🏾🥰

#freetobeme 🪂

#letsgo 😝

I do😌, 🔥 #freedom 🔥

#yippy 🍭

I choose ✨me✨😜

#yippy x2🍭

And can’t🤏🏾🙂‍↔️

And is🎧😇

🫣

I thought this was funny🤭,
I love how the internet don't take anything seriously😭

Very cute🌎🌒, indeed😌 by @03rubylee

All the different ones I could think of
that ✨I support✨✌🏾😜
(If I think of more, they WILL be added🙂‍↕️)

My people✊🏾 fought for everyone and everything.
My ability to even have a voice to use is because of them
and all their allies, which weren't all black.
So, tf I look like not returning the favor?
A fucking clown🤡and the circus🎪,
That's what🫪 lol

I just feel I’m not only failing these other communities,
But I’m falling my people and myself,
Who still fight to this day.
I'm more blessed than many of them were/are,
even while being marginalized as a black person, a woman,
a black woman, and even for being young
(in comparison to the government with one foot in the grave, taking away ppls rights and everything else🙃).

I have a conscience and a heart...
Which screams inside me for
love, peace, equality and hope🙏🏾

That's it.
And you're all welcome for that😌
Have a good day and support humans rights☮️
Because you're real shitty if you don't 🖕🏾😒
You're a human. You want people to support you.
So, support them too!
It's called "common sense" and it's free...
so use it. K, thanks🥰 by @03rubylee

BOO!🧙🏾‍♀️ IT’S #MIDTERMS TIME🇺🇸
Someone very wise once said:
“The world might be going to shits💩🚽...
Doesn’t mean we have to🙂‍↔️”

SO DID YOU GO #VOTE ?🫪
Don’t panic, you’ve still got time✋🏾😮‍💨
But panic a little because the last day is tomorrow!🗳️
I’m a #earlyvoter , and yeah,
that DOES make me better than you😌 (lol💀😭)
Just kidding.
It doesn’t because every vote matters!
Get y’all asses up and go vote!
Takes less than half an hour.
Do your research and go!!!

Thank you for coming to my PSA...
You’re not allowed to leave until you vote😡
We’ve got until the end of November 3rd!
That’s a long time from now😈
GO VOTE OR PERISH UNDER THE WEIGHT OF YOUR REGRETS FOR NOT DOING SO👻🎃😳
And now that, is truly the most scary thing of all😬

Almost forgot, #FDT🖕🏾😡
And finally, you’re welcome for the encouragement✌🏾😜
I do what I can😌 haha.
Have a good day/night🎃🎄 by @03rubylee

Didn't really have anything to post😬
#swag ✌🏾🤓 lol.

I was reading some random thoughts I wrote
over the years and decided to share them,
Because what else do I really do?😭
I don't remember writing most them, tbh💀

The second to last one is the most relevant rn✍🏾
It's been a really long and challenging road,
But I guess the most beauty within what I post
is that fact I get to at all, yk?
I've lived to write the story, my story, and share it with whoever chooses to read.

Just seems too precious to me, it always has😅
There's just a huge blessing within being free enough
to document and share it.
Feels almost like ✨magic✨, I guess.
Like this thing that shouldn't be taken for granted...
I don't know, just has always felt so significant.

Writing has saved my life, in every way imaginable.
I'm aware I'm not the best at it...
but that's what makes it mine.
I wouldn't wanna write any other way😇
I do wish to improve and that comes with time.

For now, I'm happy... because I've broken free
of a lot of things that would've broken me instead.
Writing helped me do that.

My intentions, here on out,
are to write from wholeness☀️
I feel deeply renewed🐦‍🔥 by @03rubylee

I debated a lot over whether to share.
This isn’t even the only story I have.
I’m only 23, and I remembered other instances
where I was made incredibly uncomfortable by
men old enough to either be my father or grandfather,
as well as some not much older than me at the time.
Men, who have been teachers or substitutes.
Random ones, both online and in real life.
And, after years of hearing stories of women
from my own family who went through worse,
I considered myself “lucky”.
The thought of “Yes, they made me uncomfortable and some have even forced themselves in some way
(groping and kissing) but I hadn’t actually been entered.
I’m very lucky.”
That’s no way to think... and a heartbreaking way to live💔 especially while first starting puberty, and since then.

I also decided to share a different perspective
on overlapping concerns, being the result of this violence,
in regard to women losing their rights everyday
for the sake of someone else’s agenda.
I stand for women’s rights, including abortion,
Even though I almost was.
I believe it’s better for no one to be born than to be born
within trauma and abuse, with no protection.
In many regards, being invited right into the devil’s home...
for a sleepover.

In conclusion, when someone stands up for something, there’s always more on the surface than
what it may seem like. People believe they know me.
That life has never been particularly difficult for me,
or I can’t be serious when sharing my own hardships,
just because of how I look or act.
And though it’s embarrassing to share this...
it’s not my embarrassment to carry.
All I did was be born.
Even if unwanted since before so, and unprotected after,
by the very person who gave birth to me.

I thank my mother (not same person) for her strength,
her voice and efforts to protect others.
A voice for everyone is a voice to none.
Silence isn’t an option when we all carry a scream inside
that demands accountability, reform, justice and change!
Thank you for reading.
Stay safe, and I support and believe your stories🩵🎗️

#iamjanedoe #janedoe #cornell7 #cornelluniversity #story by @03rubylee

haven’t felt quite connected
to the moon in a long time.
Still, her glow reflects on the ocean’s waves🌊
and pulls them, unwaveringly.
She stabiles the weather and seasons.
Thats all that remains of the Moon’s grace for me
and I’m still thankful🙏🏾 anyways.
I believe the moon saved my life,
in many ways, simply by existing.
I think I was able to do the same.

Unlike her new meaning,
I have only ever left what had been made clear
didn’t want me to stay or couldn’t handle
the responsibility and reality of keeping me.
That is, only after giving all I had, in every situation.
I’m not a toy or npc character within someone else’s story.
How the hell could I ever call myself
a writer/poet if I allowed that?
I just simply hate regretting things...
That’s likely why I stayed longer and gave more than I should.
If there’s nothing left to give,
There’s nothing to regret, “what if?” or “maybe?”🤷🏾‍♀️

You could’ve (and still can) choose an easier path,
Because we both know this is a harder one.
You have enough you deal with everyday.
You deal with more than most, that’s Including myself.
Yet, you still choose being here with me.
So, in knowing that, why wouldn’t I choose the same?
I’ve given more to others and received much less
(if really anything at all).
Everything, ultimately, only ever really benefited them.
As far as I’m concerned, they all got what they really wanted, regardless if they used me to do so.

If I’m falling, I’m gonna enjoy all the sights
on the way down🪂 this time.
All I know is, I feel happier and more at peace
within myself lately.
Adding you to that, hasn’t disrupted anything.
Only heightened everything, in a positive way.
I just hope I do the same👉🏾👈🏾😶

Lastly, I thought this 💫 was like a moving/magic star
(Like Kirby, yk?),
Apparently it’s not (which makes me question
how many emojis I’ve used wrong🫪)... But it is now😌🤣
I hope this makes you happy and
have a good night🌙, Pookie✌🏾🥰
(and ✨pookie✨ only👊🏾🤬 lol) by @03rubylee

*Spongebob voice*
"The gangs all here😌"
👓🎧🎶

Whether “with” or “not with” someone,
I still have to live with me,
More than anyone or thing else.
I don’t ever hold space for what I don’t
wholeheartedly feel hope in...
And that is my “delusion”.
I’m just living on hope.
The love and joy, pain and despair,
agony and grief, peace and happiness.
life and death, to the highest depths,
which I refuse to change.
I need to feel whatever, for however long I need to.
It’s how I process, grow and heal.
It’s who I am (‘cause I’m beautifully self-attuned
and deep like that🙂‍↕️ lol).

TLDR: Another life lesson is not my intention.
It never was, and yet, it will continue to happen anyways because that’s what life is.
But, given the track record,
can you blame me for always bracing at any kind face,
full of intentions and sentiments,
but only portrayed or expressed through
the border of an oled screen?🫪
(Sorry not sorry to have to clock it🤏🏾👀 lol).
...if you punch somebody in the arm, it’s gonna hurt.
No matter how many times you punch somebody in the arm,
they’re not gonna get used to the pain.
It’s still going to hurt just the same.
But, I feel that’s only until your mind learns
to tell your body to move before being hit.
So please forgive me, if at times, I tend to flinch.
It’s been what I’ve learned,
to survive what I’ve been through😶

To you⛑️💫🌩💛,
You know who you are☀️
The “punch” of you to my arm, I believe,
is one I won’t come back from as well
as I’ve managed to with others.
Still, to “-never have your love at all-“🎧
I think would be more painful.
I give fair chances, no matter what I’ve been through;
Not due to the character of who I want,
But due to the character of who I am,
have been and always will be🔥
So, it’d be nice if you kept that in mind...
‘Cause you will be graded on your performance,
through a randomly posted poem/writing/lyric thing,
if you fuck up🫪
You can’t blame nobody or nothing but yourself,
pookie😇

Not just clowns🫠🫰, a whole damn circus🎪

I forgive myself...
Within everything I write.
Every emotion I feel.
Everything I think.
All that I share.
It is all my stage, my church,
my home and my heaven on earth;
Despite a by @03rubylee

New case📱, pop socket is ✨great✨
She's so cute🎀 my new favorite thing👏🏾🥹

I always am🫪
I always am🙂‍↕️

Combined three different short thoughts,
from different times, together.

I think I like it...
It'll suffice for now😌
I really like the scar part.
Thought of it last night...
feels poignant.

Wouldn't be me if I wasn't✌🏾🤪

Aren't we all?🫩🤣

Me, with anything AND everything😶

🐦‍🔥

"Not all",
But still too damn many🫠

🎶🔊‘cause you☀️ already live inside my head🎧

Oh, how I hope🙏🏾

I look good here👸🏾 lol

✌🏾🥰

I also look good here too!🥺🍼🐴 by @03rubylee

🎶Know I shouldn’t🌩,
But🎧❤️‍🩹...

~random gallery dump~
Cleaned 🧹 out my photo gallery today.
I’ve officially made more room for more media
I’ll (likely than not) eventually delete too💀

And isn’t that what it’s all about anyways?
To delete it all, just to save what
will be deleted later on, as well.
It’s ✨the circle of life✨😌🤣

So, here’s to a new cycle🎉
And some much needed storage space🙂‍↕️ by @03rubylee

“ɪɴ ᴛʜɪs ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ, ᴍᴇɴ ᴅᴏ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴡᴀɴᴛ.
ɪ ᴅᴏ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ.”
- ᴘᴇɴᴇʟᴏᴘᴇ, ᴛʜᴇ ᴏᴅʏssᴇʏ🎞️ by @03rubylee

Nothing is more #heartbreaking💔 😢🤣 by @03rubylee

“-I don’t play with my pen🗒️
I mean what I write ✍🏾 "

"-Could he try me? Mmm, most likely"🌩️💫
#whocares #nothingmatters 🙂‍↔️
#needtoknow

Eattttttttt👏🏾😝
(Just so funny to me🤣)

goodbye kisses to the past💋
and hello kisses to the now💋

Everything holds meaning because of me✌🏾
And I can change the meanings
Whenever I want🖕🏾

Fuck ai🤬 But this is a vibe😬
I didn't make it🫣 sooo.... #scuba 😭

Me 24/7 365💀❤️‍🩹

Random dump over
Til next time👋🏾🙂‍↕️ by @03rubylee