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Adnan Malik

@adnanmalik1

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“Here’s lookin’ at you kid" A breakthrough moment 2 years into therapy was when inching towards the end of a session, hand on my heart, inner child & adult both activated, a penny dropped. For years I had been taking my wounded inner child into relationships looking to heal him. But now my therapist had alluded to the fact that relationships were not spaces to carry unhealed trauma. “Who will look after him then?” I asked fearful & unsure. She stared back-face stern, eyes compassionate- holding space for me to answer my own question. It took a few seconds & then my right hand clasped my heart. A fat tear shot down my cheek. I took a deep breath into my belly and answered beside myself. 

“I will take care of me” 
The words dropped out in front of my mouth like uncomfortably large, tangible objects. I could see their outlines and sense their weight. Leaving me. And then a few more tears like rain smattering on a windshield. ———-- Recently I took a @cppdcounsellingschool course titled ‘Self Development’ in which I learnt about “Transactional Analysis” a blueprint for behavior suggesting we carry 3 ego states as the core of our personalities: Internalized parents (critical & nurturing) 
Inner-children (free & adapted) The Adult- rational unemotional mediating ————— One of the most tender exercises in the course was writing a letter from our young selves to current selves about what they NEED from us. Here are some things my little dude said to current me: “Always show up whole. No hide & seek” “You cant change people. All you can do is change yourself & hope that their responses towards you change” “Dont set pre-conditions for love. Go in with intention not expectations” “I’m going to make responsible choices for me. Even if they arent exciting like so many projections of my script are” “true self-love is holding boundaries in situations where you are tempted, but the situation doesnt hold your values” “That was then, this is now” “Stop reacting & start responding. In the here & now not influenced by past stories” “Let’s integrate” —— What are some of the things your inner child would say to current you in a letter? by @adnanmalik1
On this Woman’s Day, I want to share a completely self-funded music video that I conceived of way back in 2013, which was a tribute to the strong, independent women of Pakistan and came straight from my ❤️ ——————————————— The video is dedicated to Nisar, my maid, second-mother and childhood caregiver who passed away a few years earlier. To quote from a mother’s day post that I recently shared about her- “What I learnt the most from you was how a woman from the village (Fateh Jang) could stand up for herself and not be dependent on a man. I’d love hearing your stories of valor of leaving your husband when he brought a second wife home. You took your 4 kids and raised them independently in your paternal house through your own hard work & money & then came to the city and raised me. You never took shit from anyone & when you weren’t in care of me or my family, you’d be smoking a hookah like a bad ass in the quarters downstairs. You had all the power, men had nothing on you! ————————————————- From the Press Release- “My Punjabi Love For you” is an evocative and propulsive experimental music video/short film, which tells a story of a young rural wife who attempts to overcome the challenges faced by idependant women in a male dominated society. Inspired by the raw and grungy sound of the track “My Punjabi Love for You” by Bumbu Sauce, the video propels you into the world of its female protagonist and her troubled relationship with men and society. The video piece draws inspiration from classic Pakistani cinema (Aurat Raj, Ms. Singapore etc) and cult Martial Arts Films (Lady snowblood, Kill Bill etc) and hopes to contribute to the ongoing dialogue about gender equality in Pakistani Society. (Curious about your thoughts on the ending where she whispers something into her husbands ear and rides off into the horizon alone….) Written & Directed by Adnan Malik Produced by AMP DOP Zain Haleem// AD Syed Ali Raza // Art Director Muhammad Murtaza // Costume & Casting Director Anila Murtaza // Editor Muhammad Bilal // Grading & Rotoscoping Bilal Ashraf// Compositing & Stylization ashif Reza // Aamina's Wardrobe Adnan Pardesi //Make up Abu Bakr// by @adnanmalik1
Allow the fear of the unknown to inspire you ✨ by @adnanmalik1
🍂❄️🌱🌺 Reflections on Seasons of self I came into this retreat in the Winter of Self. After an arduous, initiatory couple of months that had touched some very deep wounds, I didn’t know if I could hold space for this group in my full presence. I genuinely felt overwhelmed and under capacity. I’m so grateful to have had @mehreenhaider85 as my co-facilitator, organiser & ally. Solid as a rock and kindly compassionate, she trusted that I would be able to pull through. After many conversations, my big aha moment came when I realised the retreat didn’t have to be so intense. It didn’t have to be perfect. I had done so much of the planning from the masculine — holding, organising, anticipating, wanting to “make things happen.” But collective nervous system attunement became less about doing and more about listening. Receiving. Trusting what was unfolding. Trusting who was showing up. And trusting that the potent landscape and ancient wisdom of Hunza would hold us regardless. I had to surrender to the flow and creativity of the feminine. And somehow, by personally doing less and attuning more, there was greater space for the collective to flow authentically and with more ease.  Because what transpired in Hunza, at the supremely comfortable @ambiancehotels was actually deep transformational magic. We laughed more than we cried. (And we cried a lot.) We shared openly and vulnerably, we moved our bodies with equal parts precision (thanks Mehreen) and abandon. We worked with sincerity and integrity with our parts. The frozen parts, the shadowy parts, the young parts, the masculine (Jalali) parts, the feminine (Jamali) parts, the protective parts, the undeveloped parts, the exiled parts, the adult parts. It’s as if we disassembled ourselves with deep care and reassembled something curiously new. Something courageous. Gently transformed beings who became more intimate with self. More surrender. More joy. More connection. More faith. Thank you to everyone who showed up. For bringing your wounds and your magic. For making this such a pleasurable, heart-led transformational journey.  And for supporting me to enter my season of Spring as well 🌱🩵 by @adnanmalik1
🫀🌊 Be | Longing. A Homecoming for Male Hearts. Facilitated by Adnan Malik 📆 NEW DATES: January 9-10 📍At a beach near Karachi. 📣 updated investment: 34k with our transport, 32k with your own. 📋 Intake form: Linked in Bio _________________________________ What is our relationship to belonging? How often do we twist, shrink, or swell ourselves just to feel safe, liked, or valued?   For most of my life, my compass pointed outward: If I act like this, they’ll like me. If I say that, I’ll fit in. If I look this way, I’ll belong. And yes—often I “fit in.” But it wasn’t me that was being accepted; it was the version I crafted.   Underneath, I carried a quiet hollowness… a mask held up for survival. And that was exhausting.   Recently, this has started to change. I began exploring the word belonging itself… and found “longing-to-be”.   Just to be—without performance, without bending, without pretending.   As I’ve stepped into this path, something beautiful has happened: authenticity has become a frequency, and it’s drawing in people who are also ready to be real.   My intention for this retreat is simple: to create a space where masks can soften, where we can meet the raw, awkward, powerful, playful, tender, contradictory truth of who we are— and celebrate this together. We will do this through the ancient wisdom of group circle work, embodiment practices, energetic and somatic work.   Because when men sit together in their authenticity, we glimpse the potential of a new future. A new vibration that can shift not only our relationships with each other but the systems that rule our planet.   To be loved by others, we must learn to love ourselves first.   If this speaks to you— brother, you are welcome here 🫀 by @adnanmalik1
The Inner Journey| Awakened Man Retreat ⚔️ I facilitated my first 5 day menswork retreat in the ancient & sacred mountains of Hunza. The first few days were about trust —
forging a brotherhood strong enough to hold truth. Together, we excavated the patterns and identities
that no longer serve the men we are becoming. On the final day, we turned to the mountains —
to nature, our oldest teacher —
to co-create a sacred ritual of release and renewal. So few men today gather in ritual.
Yet for generations, men have met in wild places —
to lay something old to rest
and welcome what is new. On this day, deep in the silence of the mountains,
the men gathered to remember:
the greatest battle is not fought outside, but within. Through meditative walking and ritual,
they brought their old identities — the ones that no longer served —
to the mountain’s altar. There, with clarity and devotion,
each man cut the energetic cord to an outdated self. In one clean swoop — a death and a birth. Between the worlds of what was and what will be
the sword moved with clarity —
and the awakened man remembered his essence
. . . .

Beautiful Videography by @nawaz.explores 
With deep gratitude to @resonancebyambiance for their incredible hospitality and for making this retreat happen 🙏🏽 Note: consent was taken from each of the participants for this video. by @adnanmalik1
🖤 Tuning into my wholeness and inner wonder for a while. Take care of yourselves. by @adnanmalik1
🖤 La vida rústica con el Galgo Ruso 1) Snouts 2) 🌈 3) French hikes 4) Enter the portal 5 & 6) “Sacred water” 7) The cow’s foot 8) Running in the shadows 9 &10) Teary eyed meditations 11) The girl & the dragon 12) open road 13) skiing day 1 / La Molina 14) goofy balance 15) Later that day on the blue slope 16) The sweetest ally 17) Amor 🖤 by @adnanmalik1
Redefining masculinity starts with unlearning: Boys can cry, and they should feel. Strength is in embracing emotions, not hiding them. #RedefineMasculinity #BoysFeelToo #EndTheStigma #AahungNgo by @adnanmalik1
💫 “Resistance & Acceptance” A somatic & energetic men’s workshop in nature 🌊 Facilitated by Adnan Malik 11/12 January | Private Beach | Karachi I’d love to see you there, brother 🤍 Limited spots. Fill intake form. Link in Bio. . . . Indoor 📷 @noorulainali by @adnanmalik1
I love me a sweet meet-cute project to direct! This one felt like a throwback to more innocent and magical times. And I loved co-creating this with a wonderful team 💜 Project: Bubbly Surprise Brand: Cadbury Agency: @ogilvy_pakistan Produced by: @sugarhighfilms Directed by: @adnanmalik1 DOP: @azmisius // AD: @ssajjadshah // Production Design: @tanya_mirza // Wardrobe: @vardah_aziz Music & Sound Design: @rjksound // Post: @postfusionofficial @wahabdanka // Grade: @thepostbrothers // Talent: @citrustalent @ahmiiii__ // make-up @tauseefahmed.official by @adnanmalik1
Throwback to KWF 2023 ✨ Last year, our incredible facilitators came together to host the largest celebration of wellness for Karachi’s community. KWF’s essence is geared toward providing insight and experience into various aspects of well-being, ranging from; spiritual, physical, intellectual, and emotional wellness, with several community spaces for individuals of all ages to enjoy! Will you be a part of KWF ‘24? We can’t wait 🧡 #karachiwellnessfestival #KWF24 #thehealingfeeling #holisticwellbeing #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness by @adnanmalik1

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