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Birgit Itse 💎 TEDx Speaker|Author|Ghostwriter

@author.birgit

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#AberdESTonian
#ghostwriter for #speeches, business books, and memoirs.
📚Author of 7 books
🎤TEDx speaker
💡Inspiring Workshops
📸 Occasional model

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Lubatud suur uudis. 🥰

"Minu Šotimaa. Täiuslik elu" on nüüd ilmunud.
Täna kohtusin raamatuga ka ise, aga
30.03.2026 on ametlik trükikojast saabumise päev.

@petroneprint
#minušotimaa
#täiuslikelu
#väliseestlased by @author.birgit

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6 months ago

Storyland Sessions at Findhorn Bay Festival is probably one of my favourite open mic event I have been and performed.
Hamish did an excellent job putting this evening together - what a variety, and what quality!
And the location - Duffus Village Hall is a beauty!

I read a poem from my poetry collection Hidden Gems.

Absolutely the highlight of my week.
Was lovely how later people came to speak to me, and said the way I read my poem stood out.
One of them even asked for another wee poem during the interval. 😇
And - I met people who had attended Estonian literature festival @headreadfestival

@storylandssessions
@findhornbayarts
@hamishgrantnapier

#findhornbayfestival
#openmicevent
#spokenword
#hiddengems by @author.birgit

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5 days ago

I'm not responsible for your feelings.

As correct as it sounds it's also very much dismissive and defensive when used after someone has just shared how a certain behaviour makes them feel.

It's not uncommon that people who have a lot on their plate become more sensitive to rejection, and less receptive to praise.

I've witnessed it a lot, and this feeling isn't unknown to me either.
I became aware of it during hypnotherapy sessions with @leanojala.

When reading things, the power of asking instead of assuming that another person wants our advice (do this or that, think positive, be grateful, etc) , positive words (praise, proofs that life is good, etc) became very clear.
I noticed a couple of my friends asking:
what do you need right now?
what do you want to do next?
what can I do to support you?

Our capacity to deal with life varies.
It depends on so many things.
We all have triggers, things that hurt us. Some people work on themselves to turn them into glimmers, others use it as an excuse, and then there're those who are not even aware what theirs are. They just react.

We don't have to tiptoe around other people but stomping on the pieces they're trying to pick up isn't kind either.

So next time someone tries to explain how they felt in a certain situation, the least you can do is to try to understand.
Nobody else can do it for you.
Asking questions helps.

#becominghappy
#dismissivesentences
#responsibility
#triggers
#askdontassume taken in Värska by @author.birgit

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9 days ago

Having a closer look at something most likely will change your perception of it.
Finding out facts and stories, getting a first-hand experience is something pictures hearsays shouldn't replace.
The same with people.

Appreciation goes hand-in-hand with curiosity and acceptance of what was, and is.

Thank you, @barnardos_uk for making this visit possible.

#forthbridgescotland
#ontopofthebridge taken in Forth Rail Bridge by @author.birgit

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17 days ago

I'm fine!
True, sometimes we are fine, or this works as a self-assurance.
But other times it's a beautiful mask we wear.

Revealing parts of ourselves feels to risky.
To be visible, to be really seen means facing potential judgement.

Some people wear this mask all the time, and their real intentions become visible when they don't get what they want.
Believe those moments.
Write down everything that happened, especially if it was bad.
You won't remember when after two weeks of silence they hoover back in with their best behaviour.
Your body will betray you.
The closer physically you are, the more likely you're going to fall back into their pocket.
The same way you did the first, second, third, eight time.

Choose people who respect your no.
Who ask what do you need when you're tired.
Who laugh with you not at you.
Who want to be with you because of who you are not because what you can provide.

That circle can be small.
But it's you who can make it a strong one.

#innercircle
#beingseen
#wearingmasks
#crochetoutfit
#beadjewellery taken in Aberdeen, Scotland, UK by @author.birgit

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20 days ago

What did I learn from the Beast Race?

That I’m more capable of doing things than I thought I was.
That sometimes, listening to my body is not a good idea because it’s trying to talk me out of doing things I end up enjoying a lot.

I signed up for the Beast Race in mid-August because this summer has been a bit crap when it comes to being physically active. Injuries, plus a minor surgery – I had to hold myself back – no big hills, no swimming, no other fun things.
I was struggling.

Choosing SAMH as my charity was an easy choice. I set up a JustGiving page, and made a goal of raising £300 as my first ever fundraising attempt. I was excited but also nervous.

I don’t run.
Am I fit enough?
I don’t want to injure myself.
Baased on my fitness levels I was given a training plan.

All went well until the end of August, when during my walk in Linn of Quioch I hit my middle toe against the rock in the middle of a wide path. I had another five hours to my car. By the time I got home, it was purple. I was annoyed. But I’ll be fine.
A week later, I started feeling unwell.
Lyme’s disease. It didn’t surprise me – I had picked ticks from my legs at least weekly. Now one of the bites was itchy and growingly red.

I still trained, although it felt like half-arsing.
The challenge became to train enough to maintain my fitness, and not to overdo it.

Some people said I should consider dropping the Beast Race for this year. Not a chance, I told myself. I’ve still got two weeks. I’ll feel fine by that time.
Wednesday before the Race I woke up with a blocked nose.
I was swearing. Staying kind to myself became increasingly difficult.
Maybe your body is telling you not to do it, and rest, and take it slow?

I’ve been taking it slow and resting all summer. I want to move.
Maybe my body is telling me about the doubts I have about myself – that I’m not able to complete it, and now comes up with all the valid excuses to make me back out?
Yup, that’s probably it, I decided. taken in Knockburn Loch by @author.birgit

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25 days ago

Disappointment.

People are afraid to disappoint someone they care about, and when someone disappoints them, they tend to think the person who behaved in that disappointing way just doesn't care...

What disappointment really shows is ... care.
You care enough about that person.
Whatever the reason of disappointment, it mattered enough to evoke #emotion.

We can't avoid #disappointment.
Sometimes it's internal, other times it's external.

What we can is how we think about that feeling.
So what if disappointment is good?

#becominghappy
#thinkingmatters
#whatif

👠👗 Rachel Hay
📸 Nimalam Thivariam
Event @fashionartmedia academy fashion show taken in Aberdeen by @author.birgit

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a month ago

Did it upset you because they did it or because they told you they did it?

How do you react or respond in situations like this?
Do you hide behind the mask of 'I'm fine", get defensive or try to listen, to understand someone else's experience.
Because this is often all that it is - someone sharing their experience.
Perhaps finally finding courage to share it.

Love doesn't have to be about butterflies, or never fighting. But it has to feel safe.

I keep seeing this thought in different versions.
Trust is built through how we react or respond to things.

It takes bravery, courage to be vulnerable whether it's opening up about one's painful past, dreams too big, fantasies, or just act a bit silly.

They trust your reactions.
But if you shut down, get defensive (and start attacking) or dismiss their experience, the message is clear - there's no safe space to be brave.
Not enough.
Not just yet.

📿💍@nikitafinlay.designs
📸@kelmankuts

#becominghappy
#emotionalsafety
#safespace
#bravespace
#courage taken in Aberdeen, Scotland, UK by @author.birgit

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a month ago

For years, I avoided doing things I genuinely enjoyed because of the attention it involved.
Being called vain, shamed by saying things like "all you want is attention" wasn't something I wanted to deal with.
I tried to gain less #attention, do things that were less visible, choose jobs where I could let others shine but still found myself organising things, being pushed to the limelight.

Being visible is not glamurous.
It's often part of the paycheck.
So it's better to find the silver linings.

To me, being visible means reaching more people, more people who perhaps find #inspiration or #encouragement they're looking for,
or didn't know they needed.
That's my why.

Grateful to have people who help me be 'invisible', to switch from doing to being, and be patient when I see #extraordinary in something #ordinary. taken in Pittenweem, Fife by @author.birgit

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a month ago

It's a privilege to be in your company.

Few sentences have made me feel more uncomfortable than this one when I heard it the first time two years ago. I cringed. Then felt ashamed as I felt I had disrespected her by dismissing something genuine and beautiful.
Honesty and kindness with no expectations to get anything in return.

It was said by someone who wasn't interested in the fancy facade as I call it - my calm and compsed presence, seasoned with my professional activities, joy from my visits to places, or doing things that I enjoy.

No, she said it after witnessing something private.
Something raw, messy, unguarded - my softness slowly surfacing.

The next time she said it, I cried the tears of gratitude, and confided the internal shift I felt - that it's okay to appear strong, bold, to show true leadership - it won't make me less feminine.
That my softness, access to my internal world, the nurturing and gentle side of me, that there're thousand layers to discover doesn't have to be visible to everyone but only to those who have earned my trust.

She was surprised I hadn't realised it earlier myself.
I hope you all have a friend like that.

#becominghappy
#femininity
#honestrelationships
#internalshift
#lifelessons taken in Aberdeen, Scotland, UK by @author.birgit

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a month ago

It broke my heart.
I was merely a witness, a trusted friend, so what I could've, would've and should've done were three different things.
I chose to do the right thing for them - nothing.
I offered space to share, shared my opinions and insights when there was curiosity about it but anything more felt like taking away their lesson, their responsibility for their life, their relationship.
Relationship that ended because he believed he was uncapable of love, struggled receiving care believing he doesn't need anyone, yet showing love by protecting her, making her his confidant, go-to person.
Regardless of all signs of love and care being present, he believed he cannot give her the relationship she would want.
That the most loving thing he can do is to let her go.

She knew where he came from.
He knew where she came from.

So when he started nudging her to date other people, she gave up - feeling betrayed and rejected, she called it off.
She assumed he had someone else already.
He assumed he won't be able to meet her expectations.

Both were proven right.
Him: Everyone is going to leave me anyway.
Her: They won't choose you anyway.

It was obvious how much they both loved each other, in their own way.
It was also obvious how scared they were because what they had was new to them both.
He was enough for her. He just didn't believe it.

Now, they're both hurting.
Chasing what they let go.
One shallow relationship after another.
Both too afraid to ask - but what if it had worked out?

Being seen, heard and understood is the idea a lot of people like.
The change that comes with it, the shift in your own feelings, and how you see, hear and understand things is often so uncomfortable that too many people choose coasting over growth, heartbreaks over happiness.

#becominghappy
#feelingunderstood
#beingabletolove
#heartbreaks
#whatifitworksout taken in Aberdeen, Scotland, UK by @author.birgit

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a month ago

This workshop was sold out within less than 48 hours!
Writing about places.
Around and within.

No genre restrictions.
No need to share any writing.

100% pressure free.
Encouragement and invitation to be curious, to play.

Get in touch if you'd like to book this session for your book club, writing circle or team to boost their creative thinking, and wellbeing.

#writingworkshop
#creativewritingtutor
#howtowriteaboutplaces
#creativewriting
#writingcoach taken in But n' Ben Books by @author.birgit

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a month ago