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ava waugh

@avaawaugh

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Healing is an odd thing. Sometimes you feel as if you’re all better. Other days you feel as if you’re getting sick again. But no matter what you’re feeling you have a sense of peace knowing you’re evolving as a person during this time. Change is good. It’s so scary at first but once you give up control to God, you can see what He has in store for you. Giving up control is difficult. At first, you’ll feel as if the world is crushing on top of you. You think it will never stop. Farther into your journey, you’ll still feel a sense of that pain but it wont hurt as much. Things will start to feel okay again. There will always be days you think about going back to your old, unchanged life. It’ll be a decision you have to make but in that moment your mind wont consider the happy moments you’ve experienced on your recovery journey. No one talks about the RELIEF you experienced coming home to your family for Christmas after being away for 3 months, the ACCOMPLISHMENT you felt getting a first job and getting your license, the BEAUTY you see traveling around the world, the PEACE you felt seeing your dog again after so long, the HAPPINESS that came with meeting new people and putting yourself out there, the FREEDOM you felt not having to be checked on continuously by your parents, the JOY you felt finally feeling content again. But for today, I am feeling PROUD. Here’s to 1 year free from residential treatment! Continue to choose recovery for the happy moments that will come! They are worth fighting for! by @avaawaugh

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39

3 years ago

100 days clean. a phrase I thought I would never hear. if you had told me 9 months ago at the start of my residential treatment that I would make this much progress, I wouldn’t have believed you. I felt so hopeless and lost for so long. I thought all my life consisted of was pain and suffering. I was so broken. I had to realize that my purpose wasn’t for me to be drowning in pain, but to rise up and live for what God had called me to do. once I realized God created me for more than the pain I was causing myself, I began to choose to change the life I was living. It wasn’t automatically easy after that. I had to make choices I knew were good for me, but that I didn’t always want to do. those choices helped me get one step closer to where I was meant to be. I had to surround myself with the right people. I had to respond to anxiety, loneliness and self doubt in a way I knew was healthy for me. instead of the way I was used to. I had to be vulnerable and honest. and through all that, I was able to make it this far. every time I feel unworthy or out of control I have to ask myself the same question : is the temporary “peace” self harm gave me worth all the pain i’ve had to endure? the answer is no. it never is and never will be worth it no matter what your mind is telling you. I wanted to write this for those people who believe they’re a hopeless case. for the people who are so close to giving up. I’m hoping I can be a glimpse of hope and a representation of God’s faithfulness. I want you to know that you’re never stuck in the pain that’s been brought your way. there is a way out. and you’ll never be alone in it. God is there every step of the way. He hasn’t given up on you. you have to realize you’re worthy of happiness and a fulfilling life. #shrecovery #mentalhealthawareness by @avaawaugh

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47

3 years ago

The Lord is so faithful. So thankful for this camp and these friends in Christ. by @avaawaugh

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66

2 months ago

reminiscing by @avaawaugh

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2 months ago

yay vacay!! by @avaawaugh

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72

2 months ago

all smiles for formal !! by @avaawaugh

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3 months ago

can we go back pleaseeee by @avaawaugh

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4 months ago

beach day 🤸🏼‍♂️🤸🏼‍♂️ by @avaawaugh

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4 months ago

last night 🪩🌈📸 by @avaawaugh

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5 months ago

can it just be summer already??? by @avaawaugh

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60

6 months ago

as of lately by @avaawaugh

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6 months ago

Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal by @avaawaugh

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7 months ago