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Daniel P Santovin

@bearpawriver

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Living with stage IV colorectal cancer, doing my best ⚡️
CLE 🏭 - SD 🏝️- PHX 🌵
AKA - The guy from Speak In Tongues, Tracker Dan, Buffalo Bear, and BPR
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@bearpawriver is truly one of the great people in this world. Dan is a skateboard industry vet for over 20 years who has been battling stage 4 colorectal cancer for the last 18 months. In this interview he shares the lessons he’s learned in facing the realities of life and death, why Cleveland is one of the raddest skate cities and how important it is to truly know yourself in this world. If you can, send a little bit of good energy out there in the universe for Dan. I love you my friend. Be Happy. Be Kind. Smile. by @bearpawriver
159
12 days ago
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Ever since I started this journey with cancer and chemo I’ve promised to be as honest and transparent as possible with everything going on (I hope I have). So 2 weeks ago I was hit with a fever. It was really hard and I had some high temp reads. I am however not out of the birds nest yet. The fever was treated with a very strong antibiotic for 14 days (yesterday being the last). Unfortunately without the antibiotics my ratio of life to not life significantly changes for the worse. Something we are all aware of here. We have some really good leads on where this virus is coming from so without having anything solid to work off of, I have no answers to share. PLEASE BE PATIENT AND ILL SHARE AS MUCH AS A I CAN AS WE WORK THIS OUT. My hope is to move “home” into my nephew, neice, and sister’s home and I’ll get some more time on the trail! I’ll do my best, but until hold off on the questions, remedies, and the “you got this” … my love and my gratitude for your support has been nothing but fulll force! ! 🌻gifted by @n.ataliaelizabeth #bepatient #cancer #waitingforanswers #sunflower taken in Mesa, Arizona by @bearpawriver
111
16 days ago
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I learned what every dreaming child needs to know — that no horizon is so far that you cannot get above it or beyond it. Aviator Beryl Markham FLASHBACK It was a wonderful visit with two young dreamers that I am privileged to call friends! @matthewnealguzman @anjie.guzman fewer brighter lights have I come across than these two! taken in Mission Palms Post Acute by @bearpawriver
2
19 days ago
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Anxious to stake his claim, Fausto scolds the sea for being wrong, barks that he understands her deeply, then swiftly demands that she submit to his ownership or he will show her who’s boss. “And how will you do that?” asks the sea. By making a fist and stamping his foot, Fausto replies. With her primordial wisdom, having witnessed human folly since the dawn of humanity, the sea invites Fausto to show her just how he plans to stamp his foot, so she can understand. And Fausto, “in order to show his anger and omnipotence,” perches overboard and aims his foot at the sea. Swiftly, inevitably, the laws of physics and human hubris take hold of Fausto, who disappears into the fathomless sea Kurt Vonnegut Happy 4th of something FLASHBACK PHOTO I have so many wonderful friends who are brave and kind and loving! I could go on and on .. these two butternutters are like two peas in a pod - the same in many ways but also brave and amazing as they choose to live out their lives by the directs of their heart! To me, these two represent freedom and the gift of being human! Love you two goobers! Oh yeah, they wouldn’t be afraid to stamp out Fausto! #vonnegut #cancer #wisdom #fausto #rocktheboat taken in Desert Banner Hospital by @bearpawriver
7
21 days ago
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They do not sweat and whine about their condition, they do not lie awake in the dark and weep for their sins, they do not make me sick discussing their duty to God, not one is dissatisfied, not one is demented with the mania of owning things. Walt Whitman on animals FLASH BACK FRIDAY Almost two months ago when I started this journey in the Care Center I came in here with a hard plastic tube running into my nose and down to my throat to pull out fluids from my stomach because I just had a colonoscopy bag attached. It hurt like a mother fucker! One night in a drug induced blackout (they did it, not me) I yanked that fucker out! Best thing I could have done! Anyways, I was visited my long time friend @andrewcannon, we made a really cool video interview and we just laughed a lot. Even in the worst of shit find some places to laugh! 📸 @andrewcannon #laughter #cancer #waltwhitman #oldfriends by @bearpawriver
59
22 days ago
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I won’t lie, I haven’t felt very inspired the past month or as this journey has been hard. But I wanted to give you all an update on my progress and how things are going - I’m still in the care center, no date on when I’m getting out but I am going to get with my “team” my main support people sooner than later to talk about me coming home as they are such a huge part of how my life will look after like after I get home. - I’m making big gains in my physical strength - I love PT and if anyone wants to volunteer their time when I’m home (and here) to help me get stronger I’d be super grateful. I’m able to get in and out my wheel chair easily a few times a day, I can walk with my walker pretty darn well and will be working on that more super soon! - the hardest part of all of this is keeping a positive attitude. All the phone call, text msgs, DM’s and notes on Instagram are life saving more than you know! I live for and love community and I can’t wait to get home to mine. It will truly take a village to help me along with all the little helps I will need and making sure others don’t get burnt out. For those that don’t know, I am technically in what is called Palaiative care. When I go home I will be technically in hospice. Now that doesn’t mean I will pass during my time in hospice but the chances are higher because of different factors. My hope is to live long past whatever hospice says and have a comfortable, loving, community filled life .. I guess at the end of the day, the only power that knows is the one that is greater than all of us and that we have no control of. So again, thank you to everyone, we ain’t done yet! Love you all and I’ll have more information very soon! Oh yeah, the food here is 💩.. if you come and visit please bring a small Jamba (text me ahead and I can give you a flavor) .. that makes my world SOOOO much better! #paliativecare #stagefourcancer #thankyou #iloveyou taken in Mission Palms Post Acute by @bearpawriver
102
a month ago
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“I belive if people talk, and they talk sincerely, with the same respect that one owes to a close friend or to God, something will come out of that, something good. I would call it presence.” About two weeks a go when my youngest brother Paul told me he was coming to visit he text me “I didn’t want to call because I thought if I told you all my stories now I may not have anything to share with you when I see you when I come to see you. I laughed at first and then realized that I too share that same fear; that I didn’t want to waste up all my words now because what would we talk about later? And this idea at times would paralize me from even reaching out because I thought I had nothing to say. Then last night I said to Paul basically what I wrote here, but now im praying for more time so we can have more time together and how easily our conversation flowed and there wouldn’t be enough time “ever” to talk, share, listen, grow, and be with one another .. I love you Paul, I know you want to keep a low low low social media profile and I will do my best to keep that boundary 🫶🏻 #brother #cancer #family #iammybrotherskeeper #time taken in Mission Palms Post Acute by @bearpawriver
14
2 months ago
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I had to grab Ted to make sure I got my T-Eddy award, oh wait, there is already another “cancer Dan”? Dang it! A wonderful visit this evening from my old friend Ted Schmidt; but I was really hoping for that award 🏆 #teddy #thrasher #cancerdan #friendship #tedschmidt taken in Mission Palms Post Acute by @bearpawriver
14
2 months ago
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I learned that you can get away with a lot of shit if you just do it like it’s all you knew how to do. Henry Rollins I think many of us from this generation of DIY / Rollins / Buchowski punk rock took this to heart whether we knew it or not. The most important thing was that we didn’t always know why we were in the van; but most importantly we got in when opportunity was there! #diy #rollins #getinthevan #figureitout #friendship taken in Mission Palms Post Acute by @bearpawriver
28
2 months ago
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after all is said and done there is nothing more special than a simple thank you from people who have become special friends in your life.. Thank you @shannonlshelly and @liamhusaingolf You will always have a special place in my heart ❤️ And btw, I always wanted a pet tiger! Wishes do come true! #friendship #grateful #forlife #tiger #thankyoucard taken in Mission Palms Post Acute by @bearpawriver
3
2 months ago
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Yesterday I got a lift to a new care facility! Here is the information you need to know Care Center: Mission Palms Post Acute Address: 6461 E Baywood Ave Mesa, AZ 85206 United States Visiting Hours: 8:00 am - 8:00 pm Room Oasis 138-2 (bed 2) Please DM or Text to set up a visit - walk-ins NOT welcome 😂 They were actually weighing me and it was the best way they could do it. It was actually quite fun! #needalift #towtruck #carecenter #cancer #getstrong taken in Mission Palms Post Acute by @bearpawriver
80
2 months ago
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“When they all left last night from the hospital, I made all four of them make a promise to me that this new friendship would produce more beautiful ideas and friendships to spread into the world!” Daniel Santovin Yesterday I was able to introduce 2 sets of dear friends who have become the world to me. Myke and Hillary because when I was looking and needed community Myke invited me to work at his Pizza Shop in downtown Mesa. Jayson and Emily are my neighbors who I met while tending to my now passed Landlord, Doug. They have taught me true meanings of Christian service; work with no expectations, just doing it because of love. Watching my dear friends connect the friendship circle was AMAZING! The amount of ideas and interests that overlapped just blew my mind! It was so fun to watch all four of them unwrap the gift of friendship and discovery! #love #friendship #community #cancer taken in Banner Desert Hospital by @bearpawriver
37
2 months ago
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