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Vanee B | Your Online Homegirl • Toronto Content Creator

@being.vaneeb

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For the girls rebuilding in real life chaos
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PSA: You can be a good mom and still get burnt out, need a break, or make jokes about how stressful it is. Admitting it’s tough doesn’t make you a bad mom; it makes you human.Hey, amazing mamas!It’s so important to take time for yourself and recharge. Going out WITHOUT the kids, whether it’s to a comedy show or a night out with friends, is essential for your well-being. LAUGHTER AND FUN ARE NOT JUST LUXURIES, THEY’RE NECESSITIES!!!! It’s easy to feel mom guilt when you take time for yourself, but remember that SELF-CARE ISN’T SELFISH!!!Do yourself a favour, DITCH MOM GUILT and schedule that girls’ night out: ✨ Remind Yourself of the Benefits: A happier, more relaxed you means a better mom for your kids.✨ Plan Ahead: Arrange childcare or playdates for your kids so you know they are well taken care of. Childcare can get hella expensive, so try babysitting swaps with a friend or family member.✨ Make It a Priority: Take out that calendar and schedule your girls’ night like you would any other important appointment.At the end of the day, you deserve to enjoy life, pursue your passions, and connect with other adults. Taking care of yourself makes you a better mom…don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!Let’s normalize moms having a good time, too! So go treat yourself to some well-deserved fun… you’ve earned it!—— Event Attended: @weshype and @juicecomedyto presents the @Majahhype Overdue Tour 📍Toronto —— ••••• •#Singlemominspiration #Singlemomtruths #singlemomquotes #singlemomsupport #parentinglifestyle #singlemomadvice#Mylifelessonsasasinglemom#Mominfluencers #singlemomcommunity#Torontomombloggers #canadianmomblogger #torontogirlsblog #singlemomblogger #singlemomboss #singlemomgoals #parentingblogger #mommycommunity #dailyparentingtips#momssupportingmoms #momstrugglesarereal #honestmoments #motherhoodthroughinstagram #motherhoodunplugged#growthroughwhatyougothrough #africavswestindies #jamaicancomedy #teamwestindies #Mommunity #mommunityto #makingroomforher by @being.vaneeb

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2 years ago

Soft Life Diaries: Redefining Luxury as a Single MomFor a long time, I put myself dead last. Between work, motherhood, and a never-ending to-do list, “me time” felt like a luxury I couldn’t afford. Or worse… something I didn’t deserve.But now? I’m romanticizing everything. I’m redefining luxury on my terms… not as something expensive, but as something intentional.From Unboxing a small treat that reminds me I’m worthy of softness. Celebrating the little wins… because if I wait for the big ones, I’ll never feel like I’ve arrived.Luxury isn’t about price tags… it’s about doing what’s MEANINGFUL to YOU. It’s about curating a soft life, where every detail is considered. It’s about making even the smallest moments feel intentional and special. It’s about pausing to acknowledge how far you’ve come.💬 With that being said, I wanna know… what’s a small win you’re celebrating lately? ⬇️ Drop it in the comments! 🥰 Send this to a mom who needs this reminder! ••••mental health checkin| mental health support | postpartum recovery coparenting | single mom club | black mom bloggers | millennial mom | mom community#SoftLifeForMoms #LuxuryInMotherhood #SelfCareForMoms #RomanticizeYourLife #MomSelfCare #IntentionalLiving by @being.vaneeb

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a year ago

Still Holding It Together with Lip Gloss + Prayer? Here’s Why You’re Gonna Be Okay.Sis… you ever cry in the car, wipe your tears, and walk into daycare or the house like nothing happened?Yeah… that use to be me too.Some days, motherhood, co-parenting, and chasing your dreams feels like too much. Like no one sees how hard you’re holding it all together.But this is your reminder: You’re going to be okay… even when it doesn’t feel like it.Here’s why (save this for later 📌):1️⃣ You’ve survived every hard day so far. You are the proof. (1 Samuel 7:12)2️⃣ Your child doesn’t need perfection… just presence. Every packed lunch, bedtime hug, and dance party counts. (1 Corinthians 2:9)3️⃣ You’re allowed to want more. Your soft life is still possible. (Exodus 15:2)4️⃣ You’re not alone. Someone out there gets it… and you deserve community, not just responsibility. (Joshua 1:9)5️⃣ Healing doesn’t have to be loud. Rest is strength too. (Revelation 21:5)God’s presence is the escape plan. Not perfection. Not the performance.🫶🏽 Tag a mama who needs this reminder today. 📩 Send this to a friend who’s doing the best they can. 📌 Save this for the days your strength feels invisible.✨ Come join this side of the internet… where friends meet, sisters gather, and community grows. Follow: @makingroomforher•••••Black moms, soft life for moms, faith and motherhood, single mom encouragement, healing journey, motherhood and faith, mom burnout, gentle parenting, motherhood motivation, self-care for moms, faith-based motherhood, mom support community, emotional wellness for moms, soft life era, modern motherhood, mom life balance, resilient motherhood, co-parenting support, mom mental health, encouragement for single moms, faith over frustration, real motherhood moments #MakingRoomForHer #BlackMomsDeserveSoftness #Mommunity #SingleMomSupport #SoftLifeMomEra #HealingOutLoud #GraceOverPerfection #FaithfulAndTired #MamasDoingTheMost #ThisIsMotherhoodToo by @being.vaneeb

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a year ago

Nobody really tells you this part of motherhood… Life can be full… and still feel like you haven’t done something just for you in a while.So this summer, I started doing one simple thing with my daughter: we stopped planning perfect days and started saying yes to small adventures instead. Night markets. Food stalls. Music. Lights. The kind of evenings that pull you out of routine for a bit. This night market wasn’t perfect. I ended up getting sick and had to take a moment… But we stayed. Because she wasn’t having an “okay” night… she was having a core memory kind of night. The music. The dragon dance. The lights. And then she finally caught the floaty she had been chasing… and everything else just disappeared for a second. Maybe it’s not about perfect days. Maybe it’s about not missing your life while you’re busy managing it. And I think I needed that reminder too. If you’re in this season too… don’t wait for the perfect plan this summer.Pick one thing.Say yes. Go. Send this to the friend who keeps saying “I need a break” but never actually takes one 😭•••••Summer 2: Soft Life in Real Chaos: Lucky Lion Night Marketmotherhood summer reset | soft life motherhood | reclaiming joy as a mom | mom life balance | intentional parenting | things to do with kids summer | Toronto night market | Lucky Lion Night Market | mom burnout recovery | slow living motherhood | single mom life balance | family summer activities Toronto | mom and daughter experiences | breaking routine with kids | finding joy in motherhood again by @being.vaneeb

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4 days ago

No one tells you what adulthood feels like when you’re rebuilding your life. You spend years surviving. Working.Parenting. Sacrificing. Holding everything together. Then one day, things start getting better. And instead of feeling pure joy... You almost feel guilty for wanting the very life you spent years praying for. Because you remember the version of yourself who was drowning. The version counting every dollar. The version carrying everything alone. The version wondering if life would ever feel lighter. And maybe that’s why peace feels so strange. Not because you don’t deserve it. But because you’ve spent so long preparing for the next crisis that you forgot how to receive joy when it arrives. You are not betraying your old self by outgrowing her. You are becoming the woman she prayed for. The goal was never to stay in survival mode. The goal was always to make it through. Maybe the hardest part of healing isn’t surviving the storm. Maybe it’s believing you’re allowed to enjoy the sunshine afterward.If you’re rebuilding your life too... I’m really glad you’re here. 💬 Be honest... Have you ever felt guilty during a season you once prayed for?•••••Summer 1: Rebuilding Diaries single mom life | soft life diaries | healing after survival mode | learning to receive joy | motherhood journey | life after survival mode | emotional healing for women | single mom healing | peaceful life after struggle | soft life mindset | motherhood reflections | intentional living | personal growth journey | healing journey | women rebuilding their lives | finding joy again | making room for her | survivor’s guilt | survivor’s remorse | enjoying the life you prayed for | soft life for moms | motherhood and healing | life gets better | rediscovering yourself | slow living for moms by @being.vaneeb

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5 days ago

PSA: I really enjoy peace and fly shit. Being at peace, looking fine, feeling good... that’s it. That’s my vibe.Somewhere between motherhood, responsibility, and holding it all together, a lot of women start believing there’s no space left for them. Not because life takes it. But because nobody teaches us how to keep it. So we delay ourselves.We reschedule joy. We keep telling ourselves we’ll get back to us later. But later has a way of disappearing if you’re not intentional. And before you know it, everyone gets a piece of you except you. Because constantly putting yourself last isn’t the prize. I can love my daughter deeply and still choose myself intentionally. I don’t hope I get time for me. I schedule it. I protect it. I make room for it. Not as a reward. As a requirement. So these days, self-care looks like solo nights out, comedy shows, buying the ticket, and giving myself permission to enjoy my life. Because sometimes making room for yourself is really just making room for HER again. 💬 What’s one thing you’ve done recently just for you?•••••motherhood identity, mom guilt, self-care for moms, intentional motherhood, soft life motherhood, single mom life, Toronto moms, women rediscovering themselves, burnout recovery, balancing motherhood and self, making time for yourself, motherhood and identity, modern motherhood, emotional reset, women self-worth by @being.vaneeb

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10 days ago

Part 2: I kept waiting for the "right season" to enjoy my life.Then I realized… that season wasn't coming. We tell ourselves it’ll come later…When life finally slows down. But motherhood has a way of turning “after” into a moving target. So we stay in survival mode with a quiet hope that one day life will finally feel like ours again. And I get it. I was there too… waiting for the “right season” to live my life. So I stopped waiting for the "right season."I bought a comedy show ticket 51 days in advance. Not because life was perfect. Not because I had it all figured out. But because I was tired of waiting for permission to enjoy my own life.That night wasn’t really about comedy. It was about remembering… I’m still me. Not just what I do for everyone else.Because the truth is… if you keep waiting for life to settle before you enjoy it, you’ll miss the version of you that’s been trying to breathe in the middle of it all. 💬 So here’s my question for you: What's one thing you'll make time for this month… just for you?🤎 Send this to the friend who says she’s fine… but hasn’t laughed properly in a while. •••••Soft Life in Real Chaos: You Don't Have to Earn Joymom life | motherhood burnout | soft life | self care for moms | mom guilt | women identity | single mom life | intentional living | burnout recovery | mental load of motherhood | finding yourself again | motherhood truth | joy in motherhood | parenting burnout | women rediscovering self | Toronto moms | real mom life by @being.vaneeb

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11 days ago

POV: Motherhood will humble your social life REAL quick. I used to think I had to earn enjoyment. Get the promotion. Save more money. Figure everything out. Get through the hard season. Then I’d celebrate. But somewhere between adulthood and the ghetto trenches of parenthood, there was always something more important. Another bill. Another birthday party. Another field trip. Another thing that needed my money, my time, or my energy. And without even realizing it, I became really good at creating joy for everyone else while postponing my own. I could justify spending money on making my daughter’s childhood magical. I could justify showing up for everyone else. But when it came to myself? That somehow felt… optional. Something I’d get back to later. And somehow joy kept getting pushed to later. But what if later never comes? What if being a good mom and enjoying your life were never opposites? I don’t think we talk enough about this part of motherhood…. The part where you become everyone else’s priority and somehow fall off your own list.🎥 Part 2 later this week. 💬 Tell me I’m not the only one who kept saying “later.”•••••Soft Life in Real Chaos: Choosing Myself Without Guiltmotherhood will humble your social life | mom guilt and self care | more than a mother | motherhood identity | making time for yourself as a mom | moms deserve joy too | motherhood and friendship | life after becoming a mom | soft life for moms | single mom lifestyle | motherhood journey | Toronto moms by @being.vaneeb

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12 days ago

I didn’t realize I had slowly disappeared from my own life… until I tried to do something just for me.It was a solo night out in Toronto. Nothing big. Just something I planned 51 days in advance. But when it got close… I almost didn’t go. Not because I didn’t have time. But because I didn’t know how to justify myself in my own life anymore.I’ve gotten really good at being needed.Good at showing up.Good at holding everything together. But somewhere in that… I stopped asking what I needed. It was slow. Quiet.The kind of shift you only notice when you try to do something small for yourself… and it feels unfamiliar. There are moments that make you pause. Question your “why.”But I still went. Because I’m learning that mom guilt doesn’t always mean you’re doing something wrong. Sometimes it just means you’re doing something new.That night wasn’t about where I went. It was about remembering: I still exist in here. Somewhere under everything I’ve become.And honestly… I don’t think we talk enough about how easily motherhood can turn you into everyone’s priority… and your own afterthought. 💬 Be honest… are you in this season too? 🥰 Send this to the friend who’s been saying she’s “fine” for way too long.•••••Soft Life in Real Chaos: More Than a Mothermotherhood burnout | mom guilt | identity loss after motherhood | self-care for moms | solo date night Toronto | women rediscovering themselves | busy mom life balance | soft life for moms | single mom life reflection | motherhood identity crisis | things to do in Toronto solo | comedy show date night ideas by @being.vaneeb

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18 days ago

Nobody talks about how motherhood can make you forget you’re a person too. For almost seven years, I showed up as Malia’s mom before anything else. Somewhere along the way, I forgot that I was a person too. When I became a mom, it wasn’t the partying or being “outside” that I missed. It was the freedom…. The freedom to get up and go without thinking through a dozen other people first. Looking back at pictures from that season, I can see it. 👀I was surviving… not living. And if I’m being honest, there were years when I wasn’t happy either. I think a lot of parents quietly struggle with that. We’ve been taught that if you’re a good mom (good dad), your entire identity should revolve around your children. That wanting something for yourself somehow makes you a bad mom (bad dad). But as CFO of the More Than A Mother Ministry, I respectfully disagree. Because motherhood is something you do. It should never be the only person you get to be. So this Mother’s Day, I did both. I spent time with my daughter. And I got dressed, left the house, and did something for me. Not because I love being a mother any less… but because I want my daughter to grow up knowing that women are allowed to have joy, friendships, interests, dreams, and an identity outside of motherhood. Maybe the best thing I can teach my daughter... is that she never has to lose herself to become a good mom. 🤎 💬 Tell me I’m not the only one... What’s something you’ve done lately that’s just for you?••••Soft Life in Real Chaos: Somewhere Between Becoming a Mom... I Forgot Who I Was.motherhood | mom identity | more than a mother | motherhood journey | mom guilt | self care for moms | single mom life | mothers day vlog | women and identity | motherhood and self worth | soft life diaries | intentional motherhood by @being.vaneeb

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19 days ago

POV: “Normalize giving your children a soft, peaceful life. They’re little versions of you.” Did someone say FREE 99? 😂 So when my mom friend told me Chick-fil-A was giving away free sandwiches for Mother’s Day, we immediately decided we were going. Did we drive 20 minutes in the rain for a free sandwich? Absolutely. But somewhere between the car ride, the laughs, and our little adventure, it stopped being about the sandwich. Because kids rarely remember the cost. They remember the feeling.The laughter in the car. The random adventures. The ordinary days that somehow become core memories.And if I’m honest, the little girl in me never got enough of those moments. So now, whenever I can, I create them for my daughter.I hope one day she remembers that we laughed a lot. That life felt soft, safe, and fun.Because I don’t think we talk enough about this part of motherhood... of parenting…Sometimes you’re not just parenting your child. You’re healing alongside them. Be honest... Are you parenting your child, or healing your inner child too? 🤎•••••motherhood moments | inner child healing | creating core memories | soft childhood | mother daughter adventures | motherhood reflections | healing through motherhood | intentional parenting | making childhood magical | single mom life | soft life motherhood | Toronto mom lifestyle | childhood memories | parenting with intention | ordinary moments matter by @being.vaneeb

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22 days ago

I stopped asking permission to invest in myselfPlot twist: I look better than I used to. I feel better than I used to. I’m wiser than before. And I’m blessed beyond measure. But nobody really talks about what it took to get here. If you know me, you know I’m basically the CFO of the More Than A Mother Ministry. And one thing I believe with my whole chest!!! Women… especially mothers, need to stop feeling guilty about investing in themselves. Whether it’s a Sephora pick me up, a hobby, a solo dinner, a vacation, or simply making time for things that make you feel like you again…it matters. Because when you start disappearing inside everyone else’s needs… you don’t become a better mother. You just become a more exhausted version of yourself. And I refuse to believe that’s the goal.Motherhood (parenthood) is something you do. It should never be the only person you get to be.(SN: I’m trying to grab my Fenty foundation meanwhile Malia is creating a whole black girl magic moment on her hand)💬 Tell me I’m not the only one… 🤎 What’s one thing you invest in that has nothing to do with your responsibilities and everything to do with you?•••••motherhood | mom life | investing in yourself | self care for moms | more than a mother | soft life diaries | women’s empowerment | motherhood journey | identity after kids | healing motherhood | intentional living | single mom life | personal growth | confidence as a woman | self worth by @being.vaneeb

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a month ago