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Morgan

@bookshelfkeeps

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✎ writings & long reviews
⊹ photo diary of a reader and an even bigger hugger
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#shortprose // I see glimpses of my childhood self in my adult life and now that I’m looking for her, it fills me with such delight. Like this morning, getting up early you had to move your car in the driveway so my roommate could back out. But when you opened the bedroom door, warm and bright light burst through carving along the wooden floorboards to my bed from the open window across the living room. A window now beaming, now aglow.

It’s a different kind of light, this sunrise brightness; it’s not just bright but it’s almost tipping into being orange, and for a second it feels like maybe this is mars. For all we know it could be as I watch the dust particles caught in its beam — slowly dipping, suspended without gravity. And perhaps we are too, without gravity that is. Because I rock back onto my bottom easily and a smile so fully spreads across my face as I say to you, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵! by @bookshelfkeeps

This weekend I tried to be out in the sun as much as possible. I read the phrase on substack, “going full lizard” and that is the only way I want to talk about spring and summer. The only sufficient way to capture how much my face craves warm sunlight on it. The way my eyes begin to crinkle and my brows furrow as I try to read without sunglasses for too long. I did this a lot this weekend, and I only feel more alive for it.

I am slowly working my way through Aimee Nezhukumatathil’s newest collection of poetry called NIGHT OWL and I am adamant that the only way a person *should read this collection is while being outside. Day or night, but sunlight or firelight. Take your pick.

Sometimes when I read poetry collections there are full poems that stand out and cause me to dogear or star the corners. And then there are also poetry collections with singular lines that are so brilliant, so clever, or so full or heart, or even imagery that the line alone is enough to just stop me. The line is enough for me to circle the whole thing and just keep coming back to it. Nezhukumatathil’s collection is both of these, but it definitely tips more into the latter. Because sometimes a line is all you need.

I will say, there is one poem about the slaughtering of an elephant that caused me to underline every line. It was excessive, but I was underlining in realtime as I was reading and know I know a star to the corner would have sufficed. This poem specifically made me think about how I can sometimes get so caught up in the way poets write with attention and reverence for the natural world and her people, that I forget there is a counter balance to this awe and wonder which is a depth of angry. A kind of rage that will curse a poacher to be haunted by the ghost of those they’ve slain, that they might hear the mournful cries of an orphaned calf, that hairs might grow bristly on the bottom of their feet (and other ailments, which Nezhukumatathil does not spare the offender). What I’m trying to say, what I want you to hear is that, sometimes I forget to be a poet is to demand justice. We cannot revere beauty without being committed to protecting it in all its varied forms. by @bookshelfkeeps

Putting this together was really special for me. It was a moment to reflect on the poetry I’ve read over the years and to think about how collections can occupy the same space with their themes and the attention they offer to certain topics. I’ve read almost all of these and sampled a few (Homie, Gay Poems for Red States, Above Ground), and that also makes me feel some kind of way. Proud? Maybe grateful? Maybe both. I wouldn’t say I’m an expert on poetry by any means, but I am a devoted reader. I’ve seen the way it can heal, empower and make people feel not so alone. It’s done that for me, so I offer these recommendations to you with my whole heart. by @bookshelfkeeps

My therapist has said many wise things over the years — things that, between tears, I say “oh, I need to write that down.” And now I always have pen and paper with me at the start of every session. But one thing in particular I always come back to is her telling me this:

You are lovable because you are lovable. You do not have to do anything to prove you are worthy of a safe and consistent love.

And Franny Choi’s words in 𝘞𝘦 𝘙𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴, feel like a continuation of this sentiment.

I can only echo, that yes, 𝘺𝘦𝘴 this is one of the hardest lessons I have had to learn: 1) that I am lovable as I am, fully as I am without needing to prove my worthiness by what I do and create etc, and 2) someone’s love not staying or returning does not mean there is a lack or deficiency in me.

It is hard work, “the hardest work I have ever done. I wish it upon each of us.”

💙 by @bookshelfkeeps

Reflections on my first library, young readers & discovering books you love inspired by @madewell + @nyrbooks #gifted

✎

We didn’t have a local library in Harrisburg, South Dakota when I was growing up, so when it came to reading my first memories of really loving stories began with my grandma reading to us before bed over the long hot summers we spent on my grandparents farm. As I got older, around ten or eleven, reading began to feel like something I could make my own.

It was after the school bells would ring, I’d walk down the halls and turn right through the open double doors (always open) into my school’s library. I’d kneel before a shelf and over the course of however long it look me, I’d shuffle slowly down the rows, looking at books I’d never hear of in search of my next great read.

Looking back, this was a kind of freedom. To be left with myself, my imagination and the words and worlds of others at my fingertips.

Today, having worked in a bookstore for over the past few years, my favorite part has been connecting with young readers.

There are the bold bee-liners who come in — knowing exactly what they are looking for — reaching for the newest release in a graphic novel series, while grabbing a pillow and settling in to read it cover to cover.

Then there are the more uncertain readers (a favorite), those who don’t know quite what they like *yet and it’s a puzzle trying to figure it out.

What I tell parents time and time again is this:

Let children read what they want and what they are excited about even if it’s below their reading level, even it has a lot of pictures.

Because truly, it is a kind of alchemy to be young and to get to discover the stories that most excite YOU. That is what it means to be a reader. It’s having the opportunity to discover the stories that keep you up late with your flashlight or book light kept on as the hours tick by.

I know this with certainty, I don’t know who I’d be without books and reading; without the access to stories. An accessibility that would come to foster a real love for something that has shaped my life so fully.

I’m not here to tell you where to read books, read books where there are books av by @bookshelfkeeps

#notesfromalittleclam ⊹ I’ve been looking up a lot lately, at the sky, the trees, and feeling overwhelmed by how small I am. Nothing grounds me quicker than this. Nothing makes me feel a little more in touch with the small details of my life — my cluttered desk, my morning coffee pours, the ten minutes sitting in the car to do sudokus before an appointment, the leaves changing, so much changing quickly or so slowly I barely have time to notice it. Still I’ll be here, in my little corner with my books, with my underlined and starred pages, with my silly cats and my even more silly boyfriend and long walks in the late afternoon.
I will be small and I will be alive, for as long as I’m allowed.

࿔ ࿔ ࿔ by @bookshelfkeeps

My life has felt very tactile and nostalgic this October. The chill has come and with it the alarms have been snoozed, the coffee filled up to twice its normal amount. I want to stay and sit in the cool grey morning light a little longer, maybe tomorrow. But for now there is this.

#recentgoodthings #rgt

It’s getting cold, so I might need to store these, but wow I can’t stress how much I’ve loved these jorts. There are just certain pieces that you put on you feel the most like yourself, like being held like you’re suppose to.

When I get up in time to savor it, these are some of my favorite moments

There are few things I enjoy more than a solo date. It is so easy, and feels like one of those ways I actively can show myself care. Here is to more main character moments

Selina Chan is a literary critic in this story. She is brave and bold with her ideas, and doesn’t ever feel like she needs to pretend to be or think something she doesn’t. I loved reading her, I feel like I could learn from her.

I was a mixtape kid, but I know the value and all the intention that goes into organizing an album start to finish. It’s been fun to change our cds now that my aux died. So far The Wombats album is my favorite (not pictured)

I have the paperback of this that I’ve annotated through and through. An essay inspired my most recent tattoo. It is a special collection both for content and for the time I read it. I bought the hardcover to add to my collection of favorites I plan to mylar and protect for years to come. by @bookshelfkeeps

#review / We Radiant Things by Franny Choi

Last week I had one of those perfect evenings. The sun was still up and not quite set, I could sit outside comfortably, I was at my favorite third space — a little coffee / bottle shop that almost is never busy — outside at a picnic table. There is a big open lot to the left where a garden used to be, which I loved, but I don’t mind the days like this when I can see kids playing on the other side of the fence — just being kids under the ever speeding setting sun.

But this is not what I want to focus on right now, I’m here to talk about this book by Franny Choi, a collection of essays that has captured all my attention and praise.

It is an exploration into the representations of Asian femmes as cyborgs/robots in popular media and language to uncover what this means for how we’ve historically understood race, sexuality, labor, and technology, among many other things.

> continued on the next slide

In short, what does it mean to continually be compared to robots, the model citizens, the objects of objectification? And I think it offers a hopeful question of how does one you escape the pressure to prove they are worthy of, well, anything.

One thing about reading essays that rely heavily on popular culture is, at least for myself, much of their relevance comes from being able to relate to the references, to be near the time or the range of events where you too feel included. This is all to say I feel luckily to be in the audience of those who grew up with the Terminator, or remember watching Ex Machina for the first time. Choi is a great companion, I’m learning from her, seeing the parallels she seamlessly paints connecting historical past to the very current present — all alongside her own story. Like all great writing she’s making be question and confront things I haven’t before.

The last two days I’ve been rereading and relistening to the same portion in the I, Roomba chapter — about technology and its promise to free up time for us — most often the white majority — but how really, this time isn’t allowed for peace or rest, it’s just time back to be more efficient in other ways.

It makes me think of all the AI by @bookshelfkeeps

#notesfromalittleclam ∿ Sometimes I feel like I’m all soft body, all open and yielding and I know I should want life to soften me, but what if my work is to harden a bit more?
What if my work is to know it’s okay to close up,
hold things close, to love many but not all in the same degree. What if my work is being a bit more like a little clam. by @bookshelfkeeps

Recent good things I wanted to share ◡̈

Hearing Gillig speak about her sequel to the Stonewater Kingdom was a delightful. She is weird and silly, a favorite combination.

I came back from Ireland with jorts, which makes me laugh but I’ve been wanting a pair for years and these just happened to be there, on sale and perfectly oversized. So a win.

This color blue. I’ve never thought about color to represent seasons of my life, but this one has defined my thirties.

I’ve loved this standing monthly book club with friends. We never read the same book, but we come together to talk about what we are reading, to talk about life and always to feed one another.

Last night the sky was a wonder

I will not be kept from yearning!!
*also, yes that is a cat stroller

Taking my lunch breaks to walk around the downtown and visit my favorite local gallery

Still thinking about my veggie fry and the tomato chutney

I like how she was arched by @bookshelfkeeps

Reading Dooneen has been an interesting experience. I’ve gone in not knowing anything about it and being halfway through I’m still a bit uncertain what’s going on which at least mirrors the main character who also doesn’t know what is happening. I think what I’m wanting is more buy-in as a reader, to feel more invested in this character and their journey. Also, I want it to be more surreal. I am going to try reading a bit more before I decide to set it down.

Each month I meet with Barbara, a local poet and a friend. We get coffee and we talk all things books and writing, and practice. I always leave feeling a bit more hopeful and a bit more seen. This time around she lent me these two poetry collections:

• Vivas to Those I’ve Failed by Martin Espada, and
• These Women You Gave Me by Antoinette Brim

I really wanted to like this one. And parts of it I did. Solie is doing some really cool things with eco-poetry, and I learned a lot while reading and researching the things I knew nothing about (i could tell you quite a bit about terminator seeds), but more than anything I felt it was trying to do too much. I was struggling to follow her leaps and jumps and often felt like one or two lines really rung out among the many.

I’ll be back next week to share what I’m reading 🩵 by @bookshelfkeeps

September reading was slow and steady 🍃

Four books total!!

GENRES
1 Romance
2 Fantasy
1 Fiction

STATS
1 Re-read
1 TBR
2 from I already owned
2 Post Publication
2 Galleys/Recent releases

What I felt really lined up with what I was reading. It all felt very Morgan-coded tbh

Reread via @librofm and it was just as good as I remembered. I love when that happens with a reread and *just enough* time has passed where you generally forget the details. I feel like this book is the perfect gateway for literary readers who want to step a toe into fantasy. It’s smart, a comprehensive world is built and the parallels to power structures and justice are chef’s kiss.

Also, I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: I LOVE books where the romance is a secondary to the plot.

I read this on my first half of my flight to Ireland. And yes, I will admit of course that has added to my immediate love for this story set in Ireland.

But, I promise, even if I’d read it on a flight back to South Dakota I still would be adamant: this is a special book.

It’s a small both in its shape and page count (just under 100). Reading the last few pages i cried. And it felt so good. This is such a quiet story. There are themes of growing up, being cared for properly, and perhaps that speaks to the child in all of us.

This one holds a special place in my heart. If you haven’t read it yet, you must.

I really dont think I could have picked a better first read of Natasha Pulley’s — an author I’ve been wanting to pick up for years. This one hit on so many things I’ve studied and care about regarding religious deconstruction and how we ultimately understand our place/responsibility in the world and what it looks like to speak out against what is deemed holy.

What I didn’t expect? A f*cking apocalyptic story! And a very lovely queer romance as a subplot. Are we sensing a theme here? This one is less fantasy and more magic realism.

The writing is brilliant, it’s another smart and clever read that will surprise you by how much you find yourself laughing. The audio is brilliant, but I recommend a physically copy too (you’ll want to underline).

If I can give any advice it would be this:
Rea by @bookshelfkeeps