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Breaking The Silence

@breakingthesilence___

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Podcast & Community ⭕️
taboo ⛓️‍💥 cycles + patterns
Transparency + Vulnerability = purity
Hear you. See you. Serve you

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Imagine having dinner alone in Rome, waiting for midnight to celebrate your birthday… and discovering that the woman sitting next to you is doing the exact same thing. 🥹🎂🇮🇹

August 27 holds so many layers for me.

It’s the day I was born. In 2013 it also became my wedding date ,the beginning of a marriage that would later become abusive. In 2024 after my divorce , I intentionally chose this exact date to launch this platform : Breaking the Silence.

This year, instead of celebrating a 13th wedding anniversary, I celebrated turning 35 and Breaking the Silence turning two!! So I took myself to Rome to reclaim the day, honour how far I’ve come and celebrate this new chapter of my life.

Then, just before midnight, I found my birthday twin.

Two women. Two countries. Same birthday. Same restaurant. One unforgettable night in Rome. ❤️

I travelled alone, but I wasn’t meant to celebrate alone.

Here’s to another year of life, healing and Breaking the Silence 🥂

#SoloBirthdayTrip #solotravelwoman #eurosummer #solodate #solotravel by @breakingthesilence___

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Queen is openhartig over het onderwerp huiselijk geweld. Ze laat zien dat praten belangrijk is en dat we samen het stilzwijgen rondom dit taboe kunnen doorbreken. 💜 by @breakingthesilence___

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9 months ago

Als jonge gelovige stapte Queen in een huwelijk dat onveilig bleek. Jarenlang zweeg ze—praten had ze nooit geleerd, niet thuis en niet in haar kerkomgeving. Nu gebruikt ze juist haar stem om anderen te helpen.

🎙️ Luister het hele verhaal nu op ons YouTube-kanaal. by @breakingthesilence___

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a year ago

BREAKING THE SILENCE: LET THEM TALK — PART 2 & THE FINALE ❤️🎤
Na mijn opening mocht ik heerlijk in het publiek gaan zitten en genieten van de rest van de avond. En wat voor een avond was het!
🎶 First up: the lovely Lucy!
Na mijn spoken word werden we toegezongen door de lovely Lucy. Echt waar, Lucy, Queen zei het al: your voice is angelic! ❤️ Ik heb genoten van beide nummers die je ten gehore bracht, maar jouw rendition van Jill Scott’s Golden was écht goud. ✨ Thank you for sharing your beautiful voice with us!
❤️ A warm welcome by Queen Albertus
We werden welkom geheten door de lieve Queen Albertus. Naast host van de avond is deze Rotterdamse powervrouw ook de initiatiefnemer van Breaking The Silence. Een platform waar stiltes worden doorbroken en verhalen een gezicht en een stem krijgen. En dat is precies wat deze avond opnieuw liet zien: hoe krachtig het is wanneer we ruimte maken voor elkaars verhalen.
🌱 @mindandroots — soft voice, powerful message
Onze eerste gastspreker was Simara Polak. Wat een vrouw, wat een wijsheid! Haar stem is zacht en bedachtzaam, but her message was powerful and all-encompassing.
Ze vertelde ons hoe belangrijk het is om grenzen aan te geven en voor jezelf op te komen. Niet als teken van egoïsme, maar juist als een vorm van kracht en zelfrespect.
I swear, the inner people-pleaser in me was HOWLING. 😂🙋🏽‍♀️
I needed to hear this. Soms heb je iemand anders nodig om je eraan te herinneren dat je óók voor jezelf mag kiezen.
📝 Shekinah — a star in the making
Daarna mochten we luisteren naar het gedicht van de lieve Shekinah.
Och, lieve Shekinah. Het was de eerste avond dat ik je ontmoette, maar wat een moedige, mooie jonge dame ben jij in the making! Je stond daar, droeg jouw gedicht voor en sloop met je woorden onze harten binnen.
You are a star, little girl! ⭐ Met jouw moed en star personality kan ik niet wachten om te zien wat jij allemaal gaat doen. Blijf je stem gebruiken en laat je horen!
🌿 @cacaovalley_ — change starts at the roots
Ook het intermezzo van Valeria kwam binnen.
Om te horen wat deze bijzondere vrouw allemaal aan bagage met zich meedraagt, was zowel nederig stemmend als bekrachtigend. Haar boodschap bleef bij me by @breakingthesilence___

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Let them talk! by @breakingthesilence___

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5 days ago

I can not believe I came across this post by Shawna Mitchell saying, “Abuse is not an excuse for divorce.” ????!!!!!!!!!!

I find this deeply troubling. And as we prepare for LET THEM TALK, I cannot scroll past it in silence.

An excuse? Do you understand what it takes for someone to finally say, “I cannot live like this anymore”?

The nights they cried without anyone knowing.
The things they were too ashamed to tell you.
The times they thought about leaving, then felt guilty and stayed. The prayers. The promises. The hope that THIS time, something would change.

Leaving meant finding the courage to stop living that way. Imagine finally finding that courage, only to hear someone call your suffering an “excuse.”

Yes, I am angry.

Because somewhere, a woman is reading this who already feels guilty for wanting to leave. Telling her to get somewhere safe, then questioning whether she still believes God can change her spouse, gives that guilt somewhere to grow.

And telling her to “get over yourself” is cruel. Do you know how much of herself she may have already sacrificed?

This is why I started Breaking the Silence. I know what it costs to speak and how deeply the response can wound you.

The person being abused cannot carry the responsibility for someone else’s transformation.

Before you post words like these, think about the person who may use them as another reason to stay trapped.

Why are we asking survivors to prove their faith instead of demanding accountability from those hurting them?

#LetThemTalk #DomesticAbuseAwareness #SurvivorVoices #SpiritualAbuse #FaithAndHealing by @breakingthesilence___

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8 days ago

Only five days until LET THEM TALK!!! Our very first Breaking The Silence Livingroom Experience.

A new location, a different setting and a more intimate atmosphere, where we can get closer, go deeper and make room for honest conversations.

Joining me are:
✨ Steven Vreden — psychologist, storyteller and founder of Unbound Voices.
✨ Simara Polak — founder of Mind & Roots.

📍 Luxor Theater Cafe Dox
🗓 Saturday, October 10 • 20:00
🎟 Get your tickets through the link in my bio.

Are you ready to let them talk and choose yourself anyway?

#BreakingTheSilence #LetThemTalk #LuxorTheater #Rotterdam taken in Café Dox by @breakingthesilence___

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11 days ago

I remember when I first started speaking up about my marriage. It took so much to finally say out loud what I had been living through.

Some of the first responses made me feel like I still had to convince people that I had been hurt. I had found the courage to speak, but I didn’t always feel met with the care I needed.

Now, when I tell my story, I sometimes feel that same thing again. And I wonder how much it has to do with how people see me.

A confident, outspoken Black woman. Dressed up. Smiling. Able to talk about it without breaking down.

Does that make it harder to imagine me scared? Being controlled? Afraid of what would happen if I told someone?

You see me now. You didn’t see me behind closed doors.

I’m proud of the woman I’ve become. But sometimes I wish people could see my strength and still be gentle with me.

This is part of why I created Breaking the Silence. Because finding your voice is hard enough without having to prove that your pain was real.

As we count down to LET THEM TALK, this is one of the conversations I want us to make room for. ❤️

Have you ever felt that how people see you makes it harder for them to see your pain?

The countdown to LET THEM TALK continues. We’re making room for the stories we’ve been afraid to tell and the voices people thought they already understood.

If this resonates, I hope you’ll join us. Event details through the link in my bio. 🎤

#StrongBlackWoman #DomesticViolenceAwareness #marriagecounselling #BlackWomen #domesticviolenceawareness by @breakingthesilence___

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14 days ago

Feyenoord vintage shoot Rotterdam with @queensuhaily

#feyenoordvintage #vintagerotterdam #vintagefeyenoord #vintagefujifilm #fujixt5photography taken in Erasmusburg, Rotterdam by @breakingthesilence___

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17 days ago

I was getting ready in Rome, telling the camera I wanted to spend my birthday alone… with no idea who I’d meet a few hours later. 🥹🤍

August 26. ( Sorry the music is so loud 😂 It was playing on my phone while I recorded, so I can’t turn it down separately now ) Subtitles are on so you can follow along! 🤍, anywaysss my birthday shoot loading, and a whole new memory waiting to happen 🇮🇹

My birthday is also the day I got married. After leaving an abusive marriage, celebrating that date hasn’t always been simple. This year, I chose to take myself to Rome and give myself something new to remember.

If you’re new here, I’m Queen, the woman behind Breaking the Silence. My own story is part of why I created this platform: to make room for the conversations we’re often afraid to have.

And there’s room here for this part too. Getting dressed. Celebrating. Learning to enjoy your own company. Being open to connection, even when you’ve planned to be alone.

If you’re finding your voice and figuring out life again too, follow along. You’re welcome here. ❤️

#eurosummer #SoloBirthday #SoloTravel #LifeAfterDivorce #travelitaly by @breakingthesilence___

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a month ago

OMG if the Rome video brought you here , I am so glad you found me , lemme just give you a quick introduction 🤭❤️ by @breakingthesilence___

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a month ago

LET THEM TALK.
10 October • Luxor Theater 🎭 by @breakingthesilence___

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