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Caroline Calloway

@carolinecalloway

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No, not that one. The other writer. The one you love.
🌺🌸💊🥂✨🐍🧚‍♂️🩵🦋📘🦋🩵🧚‍♂️🐍✨🥂💊🌸🌺
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OBSESSED with this spread we shot for @interviewmag one stormy, steamy afternoon in my little Florida home with @b___armstrong & @seasoned_pr0!!!!! And then @juliette725 made it all into the most beautiful story. 🥹And now YOU can now see ALL the swampy, magical, misty chaos we’ve created together because those words and images are LIVE on Interview Mag!!!!!!!!!! GO TREAT YOUR BRAIN TO SOMETHING THAT IS ONLY MILDLY NUTRITIOUS, BUT FRIGHTFULLY DELICIOUS. I know you’re curious.And speaking of things that are of below average scholarly value, but still are fun, and experimental, and make the world a better place by pushing the culture forward! THE NEW WURTZEL BOOKS ARRIVED!!!!!!!! Like not just the gallies—this is INVENTORY. As I type this I am sitting on the blue couch in the photos, Matisse stretched out against my thigh, surrounded by ribbons and ribbons of shipping labels and silk. (It’s important to me that each of my books comes with bow!) And yes. There are currently even MORE random fucking piles of ribbon surrounding me than in these photographs. My Siamese cat is asleep, my Mango Passionfruit Yuzu Celsius is poured, and if I had to choose a collective noun to describe this forest of cardboard boxes I’m staring at, I’d probably have to call this situation in my a “claustrophobia of packages.” It’s going to be a long night.I miss the days when my home was a messy, bohemian, beachside writing retreat that was above all else: Suitable to be photographed. But alas!Like with all my projects, I invite you to go enjoy that version of my life for me, without me, so that you may take from it what you may to become more you. I really must return to the frightening, turquoise Amazon warehouse of my own making! This second book is only the beginning. 😮‍💨📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦📦 by @carolinecalloway
193
a year ago
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I’M SCREAMING. I’M CRYING. I’M TEXTING EVERYONE I’VE EVER MET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GUESS WHAT THE FUCKING GODDAMN ✨✨✨NEW YORKER✨✨✨ SAID ABOUT MY BOOK?????“Scammer is funny, engaging, and full of genuine insight.”SCAMMER IS FUNNY, ENGAGING, AND FULL OF GENUINE INSIGHT!!!!!!!! THE NEW YORKER!!!!!!!!!! WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME THEY SAID THAT ABOUT A SELF PUBLISHED BOOK????!!!? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME????!!!!!????? IS THIS SOME KIND OF FEVER DREAM???????? AND IT! GOES! ON!“Beach’s book, on the other hand, is almost irritatingly rooted in fact… Beach’s book is less meandering than Calloway’s, and yet it is also slower and more unsure of itself.”GOD, MAKE ME THE BIGGER PERSON—JUST NOT YET!!!!!!GIVE ME THIS ONE LAST DAY OF SPITEFUL GLEE AND GLOATING, AND I SWEAR TO YOU, I WILL WAKE UP TOMORROW AND NEVER MAKE ANOTHER MENTION OF AN ARTICLE THAT RAVED ABOUT MY BOOK WHILE TRASHING NATALIE’S. AFTER THE NEW YORKER AND THE WASHINGTON POST WHERE ELSE IS THERE EVEN LEFT TO GO????!!!???Today, though, just let me have this one last day of smugness and joy. Let me be flawed and petty when I tell you how DELICIOUS it felt when The New Yorker said, “What Beach doesn’t realize is that Calloway was simply ahead of her time.”I know I always joke that I’m the Patron Saint of Cambridge and Chaotic Good…… But I’m thinking of changing my entire brand to Patron Saint of LOST THE BATTLE, WON THE WAR 😭😭😭😭😭FUCK!!!!!!!! I’M SO HAPPY 😭 NOW EXCUSE ME WHILE I GO FACETIME EVERYONE THAT I KNOW by @carolinecalloway
358
3 years ago
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“She looks like Edie Sedgewick, thinks like Andy Warhol.” The brilliant and insightful @lilianolikwriter profiles me for the July/August issue of @vanityfair with photos by the cat-loving genius @martinschoeller!!! Styling by the sweet, chic @samgasmer and hair and make up by the ridiculously fun and talented @ronniepeter! The whole day was coordinated by @mmmorrigan and Claire Howorth. The next drama? Will I or will I not mail out copies of Scammer to reviewers as promised on June 12th!? Or stumble and fall flat on my face? Only one way to find out! And the stakes are high!!! Set an alarm and check back here on Monday, the 12th of June for your answer. And in the meantime, I’ll see you on my stories. (Specifically this Sunday evening because there are a few paintings I still need to finish up before we launch heart-body-and-soul into Book Promotion Mode!!!!) FULL SPEED AHEAD AND WISH ME LUCK. God knows I’ll fucking need it. 🩵🦋📘🌺🌸🧚🏻‍♂️✨🪄🪻🪺 by @carolinecalloway
613
3 years ago
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He’d call it being “spacious, gracious, and gentle” and the metric of whether or not I had succeeded at each social event was how often he had heard my voice. Make no noise that night? Good mood when we were finally alone. Cuddles and praise and security. Laugh or yap or god forbid get too excited about something and do it in a way that draws attention to myself? Icy, surly, silent treatment that would last for DAYS. But the real villain here is myself because I stayed until he dumped **ME** jfc still unpacking this by @carolinecalloway
59
15 hours ago
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WHAT AN HONOR TO SEE @lilianolikwriter WITH HER ICONIC EPIGRAPH FOR @lenadunham’s FAMESICK IN THE FLESH, IN BALTHAZAR, IN THE THICK AND THROES AND THRILLS OF A CLASSIC NEW YORK CITY BREAK UP STORY. I’m still heartbroken, but in another 8 hours it will be 48 hours since I last cried and that is an accomplishment worthy of some kind of iron-on Girl Scout badge. Speaking of girlhood and how the very best in the biz memorialize/amplify/make digestible those experiences for the culture at large, @allierowbottom herself will be at the @roxycinemanyc on Monday, June 1st in conversation with Lili about Allie’s new book. The novel follows two young girls navigating sex and power and authenticity and co-dependent ambition in the cut-throat porn industry of 1980’s LA… So basically all things I hold closest to my chest in this life besides 80’s-era push up bras and “Tropicana” spray tans. (Ugh, such good writing, Allie!) May we all never ever forget my brief stint selling topless photos as one of the top (!!!) 0.3% of all creators on OnlyFans. SEX WORK IS REAL WORK AND I TOO HAVE PUT IN MY OWN HARD DAY’S LABOR AT THE SEX FACTORY. I’d delve more into the nitty-gritty of what it means that the farthest I ever went was nipple, but I just don’t have the appetite or stamina for that kind of online nuance and inevitable spicy backlash. I’m barely able to say the right thing to myself, softly, in my own head, shaking my fists at the sky over the self-loathing I feel for having let myself been treated this way—let alone feeling capable of typing the right sentences on demand. So instead I’ll let Lili speak for me (and for so many girls) in a quote as selected by Lena: “Having a well-managed versus a carelessly managed reputation plays out for a woman in practical terms.”Lastly, I never got to give Lili her flowers publicly for this because honestly I was so certain that she would take home the grand prize, so I waited to post and now I’m have to double back. But hey. Listen up! Remember Lili’s huge Vanity Fair profile on me? It got nominated for a National Magazine Award and it was the only non-social-justice piece that did that year.Just wanted you to know 🥲 See you Mon by @carolinecalloway
23
5 days ago
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Been a solid three weeks since I last used mascara by @carolinecalloway
13
7 days ago
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Ok now we’re all caught up by @carolinecalloway
46
7 days ago
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He liked me best when I was quiet by @carolinecalloway
25
7 days ago
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Narrator voiceover: And things continued to get worse. by @carolinecalloway
37
7 days ago
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Damn we have a lot to catch up on by @carolinecalloway
18
7 days ago
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“If I could tell you one thing: Don’t be jealous. Don’t let this book make you feel like your life is boring. Like all the best parties are happening without you,” writes Caroline Calloway in her introduction to legendary British party photographer Dafydd Jones’s new book.“Cambridge Balls” collects more than 40 years of the school’s hedonistic May Balls. Read Calloway’s introduction in the link in bio.Photos: © Dafydd Jones by @carolinecalloway
15
13 days ago
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Flower hats, Pt. 2 (Just search for “flower sauna hat” on Etsy!!!!!!)(And because they’re felted wool they’ll keep you warm and because they’re made for saunas they’ll keep you dry in rain!!!!!!!) by @carolinecalloway
72
5 months ago
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