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Emily Black

@embblack

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✨real wife + mom life.
🚀 running multiple businesses
book me ↓
@sunsetskinby.em @blackmoonsips

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something we’re very intentional about teaching our girls: you don’t respond to an apology with “it’s okay.”

because it wasn’t okay.
and i never want them learning to smooth over hurt just to avoid discomfort or keep someone else from feeling guilty.

when someone says “i’m sorry,” your job isn’t to make the moment easier for them.
your job is to tell the truth about what happened.

there are better responses, like:
“thank you for apologizing.”
“i accept your apology.”
“i forgive you.”
“i’m still upset, but i appreciate you owning it.”

but saying “it’s okay” suggests the behavior was acceptable.
like the hurt magically disappears as long as the word “sorry” is attached.

that’s how you accidentally teach people they can cross your boundaries, mess up, hurt you…
and then get a free pass with a quick apology.

we’re not doing that.
and we’re not raising kids who believe that’s normal in friendships, dating, marriage, adulthood.
any of it.

i want my girls to understand:
you can offer grace without dismissing your own feelings.
you can forgive without pretending nothing happened.
you can choose healing without saying the hurt was fine.

around here, we value honesty, accountability, and real repair.
not “it’s fine” energy.

and if you grew up apologizing for being hurt, you get to rewrite that story now. 🖤 by @embblack

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a year ago

ive been working on being a conscious parent.
MAN, it’s not easy. i still get frustrated. i still get overstimulated. i still get impatient. i still get touched out & overwhelmed.

but working on being a conscious parents means i try not to blame my kids for my lack of self control or emotional maturity.

just because i don’t want to be touched, doesn’t mean they don’t need to hugged.

just because my brain isn’t regulated, doesn’t mean they deserve to be yelled at or punished.

i would say that i’ve learned through this that 80% of the times that i get upset isn’t because my kids have done something wrong or misbehaved. it’s because i don’t have enough to give & i let my emotions (unhealed at that) take over.

taking a BIG deep breath while parenting (& sometimes several) has let my brain regulate so i can see that my kids are just being kids. they sometimes need a hug. or need to talk. or need to ask questions. or need to cry.

my inability to meet them where they are when I am overwhelmed isn’t their fault, it’s mine.

and WOW parenting is the biggest ugly mirror in the world.
it’s caused me to face how many wounds i still have opened. but it can also be the biggest healer in the world if we let our pride die. if we let our little gremlins teach us about ourselves.

i don’t wanna be a selfish parent. i don’t want my kids growing up thinking that they had to cater to mom’s needs all the time because she wasn’t able to control her emotions.

i don’t want my kids to walk on eggshells around me or be afraid to tell me what they need because they’re never sure what kind of mood i’ll be in.

& if im honest, that was the direction i was headed the first couple of years as a parent. im so grateful that Jesus is teaching me everyday that im a good mom & that i have the ability to control my emotions.

i am able to regulate myself to be a better mom, wife, friend, sister, daughter, aunt, etc.

WE CAN DO THIS, MOMS! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 by @embblack

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3 years ago

like i waited all this time, for what?? time is passing.
what are you doing with it? by @embblack

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10 hours ago

🥹✨ by @embblack

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2 days ago

imagine feeling depressy all day just to walk into this happy place & lay it all on the floor 🥹✨ @sassyinsneakers_knox by @embblack

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2 days ago

ooooops. copy/paste that attitude 😬 by @embblack

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3 days ago

we’re really out here comparing our lives to people who are living lives we don’t even want???

social media will have you questioning a life you genuinely love just because someone else’s looks different. & that’s the thing. i don’t want their life. i love mine. there’s nothing wrong with the life she’s living, but there’s nothing wrong with mine either.

sometimes we just need to put our phones down & remember how much we actually love the life we’ve built. by @embblack

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8 days ago

mindin my own dang business 👏🏽 it’s called
✨MATURITY✨ a concept. i know. by @embblack

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9 days ago

PART 2. “can you keep up?”
not really, bro. not really 😮‍💨😮‍💨 come dance with us @sassyinsneakers_knox by @embblack

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10 days ago

PART 1.
this one almost killlllllled me. @sassyinsneakers_knox gave us a CHALLENGE 😮‍💨 by @embblack

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10 days ago

a little dance life update. ✨

after a lot of thought, i’ve decided to step away from Turn Up Dance Fitness.

but first, let me honor this chapter.
i’ll never forget my 5th Turn Up class. i stood in the back of the room during a dance and absolutely sobbed. & somewhere in that moment, i realized just how much trauma my body had been carrying.

i grew up dancing, but as an adult, life happens. i became a wife, a mom, walked through grief & some really hard seasons, and along the way i lost that outlet. but i found Turn Up.
it gave me somewhere to move, be loud, feel powerful & free. it reminded me that underneath all the things i carried, i was still in there. at that point in my life, i needed it.

i’ll never forget the girls who literally put money together so i could do instructor training because they believed in me when my bank account did not. the people who packed into that tiny studio for my first class. the girls who showed up at 5:30am & 8pm for YEARS. and now, the girls who keep showing up every saturday at Club4.
you’ve given me more than you know. 🥹

Turn Up was exactly what i needed for a season, and i’ll always be grateful for what it gave me. but something can be good for you in one season and still not be where you’re meant to stay forever.

leaving doesn’t erase what it gave me. growing beyond something doesn’t make the chapter any less beautiful. sometimes you just know when its time to turn the page.

sooooooo starting in november, my saturday classes will officially be under Burn Dance Fitness, and i’m SO excited to support my friend @leighannword & what she’s building. 🔥

and to my saturday girls: i really hope you’ll keep showing up.
because honestly? not much is changing.

same room. same community. same loud music. same me yelling at you

i’ll be bringing Burn choreo, my own choreo & choreo from some of my incredibly talented friends. i want saturdays to keep being a room where we empower, laugh, sweat, take up space & remember how powerful we are.

thank u for all your love & support 💛 by @embblack

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15 days ago

call us what you want but just make sure you have the right email address when you do 👏🏽✨ by @embblack

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15 days ago