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Jami Gobao Crist

@jamicrist

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🌊 From loss to light
📖 The Losses We Keep · Amazon bestseller
📰 Featured in TIME
🎤 Speaker · Women's health + brand strategy
✉️ [email protected]

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"unexplained" isn't a diagnosis. it's a research gap with a name on it.

for three years, that word was my answer. four losses. thousands of dollars. no one could tell me why my body kept losing pregnancies, only to try again when I felt ready.

up to 30% of couples with infertility hear that same word. and almost every woman I know who's been handed it went quiet the way I did. I stopped telling people I was pregnant. I stopped asking for help. I carried the shame of a body I thought had failed me, even though I did nothing wrong.

this spring I said all of that out loud, on the record, at the Externally-Led Patient-Focused Drug Development (EL-PFDD) meeting on Infertility & IVF. our testimony is now part of a Voice of the Patient report that goes to the FDA and to the people developing future treatments.

because the lived experience belongs in that room. and the limits of the research are not the limits of your body.

it's Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month. if you've been handed "unexplained," I see you. tell me in the comments, or send this to someone who needs to hear it.

🎥 full testimony + the report: link in bio

📖 more stories like mine in The Losses We Keep

#PregnancyAndInfantLossAwareness #UnexplainedInfertility #RecurrentPregnancyLoss #InfertilityAwareness #WomensHealth #PatientVoice #WaveOfLight taken in Maryland by @jamicrist

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12 days ago

I never thought my name would sit in the same article as Dr. Jessica Zucker, @ihadamiscarriage.

Years ago, when I was in the thick of my own losses, her work was one of the first things that made me feel less alone, like maybe what I was carrying had a name, and a place to go.

This week, we’re both in @time, in a piece about pregnancy loss and what to say (and what not to say) when someone is grieving one. The Losses We Keep is part of the story too. 🤍

If you’ve ever lost a pregnancy, or you’ve stood beside someone who has and didn’t know what to do..this one’s worth the read. The conversation we’ve needed is finally happening out loud.

Link in bio.

#PregnancyLoss #MiscarriageAwareness #Grief #TheLossesWeKeep #FertilityJourney YouAreNotAlone by @jamicrist

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5 months ago

A different kind of finish line. 30 days, The Losses We Keep: Our Journey to Fertility, Loss, and Never-Ending Hope will be out @soulspeakpress
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#pregnancylossawareness #fertility #infertility #motherhood #surrogate #ovariancancer #ivf #womensupportingwomen #womensreproductiverights #rainbowbaby #femaleauthors #anthology #soulspeakpress by @jamicrist

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2 years ago

Nobody means harm by any of these.
That’s what makes them hard to answer.

Also, motherhood after loss is a whole other chapter. by @jamicrist

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3 days ago

last week I wrote that “unexplained” isn’t a diagnosis. it’s a research gap with a name on it.

a lot of you said the same thing in the comments: no one told me what to do next.

so this is what I wish I’d had — the questions I didn’t know I could ask. I spent years being polite in those appointments. I’d ask all of these now.

but I want to be clear about something. this isn’t a post about bad doctors. there were people inside that system who carried me.

Taylor, the nurse who left me a note after my third loss. she saw a woman who just wanted to be a mom, and she wrote it down.

Amanda, who got me the second opinion. she didn’t just suggest it — she made it happen.

Pragati, our ultrasound tech, quietly rooted for us for years and was by my side with care through the hard and good news.

I learned most of this from them, not in spite of them. it took me four losses to understand that asking better questions wasn’t a challenge to my care. it was part of it.

if you’ve been through this, what would you add? tell me below, I’m reading every one.

(I work in women’s health diagnostics now, which is a big part of why I think about this so much.)

📖 @thelosseswekeep

#UnexplainedInfertility #RecurrentPregnancyLoss #PregnancyAndInfantLossAwareness #InfertilityAwareness #WomensHealth #PatientVoice by @jamicrist

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5 days ago

it’s pregnancy loss awareness week, and I wanted to start it here.

so many of you shared in the comments or in my dms on my last post. thank you. I read every one.

these are the three things I wish someone had said to me when “unexplained” was my only answer.

what do you wish someone had said to you? tell me below. 🤍

#PregnancyAndInfantLossAwareness #UnexplainedInfertility #RecurrentPregnancyLoss #WaveOfLight by @jamicrist

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10 days ago

A ponytail she finally let me do.

That was the highlight, honestly.

September, in no particular order:
her first field trip.
Last call at the beach.
Dinner in DC with Round21, celebrating the queens. Routine in the gym that feels damn good
An allergic reaction — so much for natural products.🫠🫠 fmlll bless steroids and Benadryl

None of it goes together. That’s sort of what the month was. And hello, birthday month. October is here! by @jamicrist

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16 days ago

October starts Thursday.

For a lot of us, October isn't pumpkin season. It's the month our losses finally get a day on the calendar.

Two years ago I wrote The Losses We Keep because when I was in it, there was nothing there for me. And every October I think about who's in it right now.

So this month I'd rather give the book away than sell it.

If you know someone who needs a copy, tell me. A friend who just lost a pregnancy. A support group. Your OB's waiting room. A doula. Your company's HR team. You can nominate yourself, too.

Drop a name or a 🤍 below, or DM me. I'll send as many copies as I can.

We shouldn't have to go looking for this stuff alone.

#PregnancyLossAwareness #TheLossesWeKeep #MiscarriageSupport #InfertilitySupport #WomensHealth by @jamicrist

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21 days ago

Hi. Still here.

I was offline most of the summer. Not a detox, not a plan… I just stopped opening things, and it felt better than I expected it to.

Then September arrived, and I’ve been buried in forms and schedules and someone always needing something by tomorrow. Same as everyone.

I keep seeing posts about starting the year organized, and I don’t have that for you.

There’s no graceful version of September. There’s just September, and all of us trying to survive it. I think that counts.

P.S. Peace and blessings to everyone currently signing something they did not read. 🙏 by @jamicrist

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a month ago

Just wrapped All-Star weekend with Round21, and I’m leaving with a full heart.

There’s something about a trip like this that reminds you — you’ve still got it in you.

When you’re deep in the day-to-day of little kids and family, it’s easy to quietly wonder if you’re still that person. The one who moved through the world this way. And the truth is, you might not be her anymore, not exactly. But being here reminded me the ability never left. It’s still in me.

I don’t think I need to do this full time for it to matter. Stepping into this work every so often fills me up in a way nothing else does…a different kind of fulfillment than the one I get at home, but no less real.

Both can be true. And that’s moreeeee than okay. 👌

Grateful for the reminder. But also, your girl needs a nap to recover too 🤣 taken in Chicago, Illinois by @jamicrist

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3 months ago

Back from hiatus, off on a work trip, and sitting with all of it.

Moms, do you ever think about the life you were living before kids? Tell me I’m not the only one. by @jamicrist

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3 months ago

This isn’t our first summer at the beach.
The first time, we came here broken.

It was 2021, and we were in the thick of our pregnancy loss journey. We packed up and moved to the beach for six weeks, not for a vacation, but because we didn’t know what else to do with the weight we were carrying.

And somehow, this place did what we couldn’t do for ourselves. We left a little more whole than we came.
So now we keep coming back. Not to escape our life — to come back to it. To center this family. To get grounded. To remember what matters when everything else gets loud.

That’s what this place is for us.

no alarm beach walk late lunch ice cream

Not the perfect summer. The real one. by @jamicrist

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4 months ago