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Jeff Hsu🌀Coach for Sensitive Men

@jeffyhsu

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Sensitive men. People-pleasers. Recovering nice guys.
Self-betrayal → Self-trust. Burnout → Flow.
(No hustle. No 'alpha bro'. No masks.)
↓ Start here🌀

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I thought I was being a “nice guy.” I was actually just hiding. 🎭

We’re taught that self-sacrifice is a virtue. We’re told that putting everyone else first is “the right thing to do.”

But after watching my Dad’s body literally buckle under the weight of “being nice,” I had to face a hard truth:
Being “nice” was killing us.

The “Nice Guy” mask is just a fancy way to hide from the discomfort of being seen. It’s a way to avoid the friction of setting a boundary. But that friction is where your Flow is hidden.

Swipe thru for the story on my Dad’s brain injury and how it changed everything. 🏔️🌀

If you have a similar story of self-sacrifice, we’re listening. Drop a comment below. I’d be honored to witness your story. 🙏

Day 1/30, thank you @stanforcreators 🙏
#SelfSabotage #Boundaries #Resistance #NiceGuy #standaretopost taken in Rowland Heights, California by @jeffyhsu

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8 months ago

We lost our dog Max a few months ago.

We almost cancelled this trip. I didn’t feel like playing or having fun. But that was Max’s greatest lesson to us— to play every day, even on the ruff days.

This clip was filmed in Switzerland, right after we said our goodbyes. Grief still sitting in my chest. Vanessa and I just trying to figure out how to breathe again.

He taught us so much about love. He embodied stillness, presence, and devotion. Especially to his mama. Vanessa was his whole world. If Max could speak, I know he’d say: “She’s perfect.”

He taught me what it means to love fully, to protect, to lead with heart. He taught me what kind of man I want to be.

And he changed how I see flow+play.

Before, I only shared flow when I felt “good.” Whenever life got messy, I’d hide.

I used to treat play like a luxury—a reward you only get when the work is done. Max reminded us that play is a necessity. It’s the point of it all. We play on the good days. We play on the bad days. (Even when I don’t want to).

Flow is so much more than “just fun” for me now. It’s become a way to be with myself when things hurt — to process, to breathe, to soften back into my body.

It helps me move through the Grief. The Anxiety. The Heaviness.

I know I’m not the only one.

How has flow (or play) helped you get through a hard season? Let me know in the comments. 👇

Thank you for being here.

Thank you buddy, I love you 🫶 🏔️🐾🌀

#gruvy #gloving #flowarts #flowstate #lightshow #rave #plur #playandflow ##healingjourney #dog #grief #movementismedicine #healingwithflow #anxietyrelief #mentalhealth #playtherapy #emotionalhealing #presence #swissalps #switzerland #mountains #mountainmagic #saidthesky taken in Switzerland by @jeffyhsu

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10 months ago

Being visible and being seen is such a struggle for me. Starting this business and showing up online has been triggering me in all kinds of ways 😩 
It really reminds me of when I first started gloving. I was SO scared to be seen, even by an audience of 1 (vs the whole internet lol). I would freeze up, I would choke.. 
I wanted sooo bad to connect with others and trade light shows. But the fear of being seen and being judged kept me playing small and even made me quit gloving (I’m glad I stuck with it).  So when I feel these familiar feelings, the familiar fear, the familiar desire to just shrink and quit, I remember my gloving journey and remind myself to keep going, don’t quit, it’s worth it 😮‍💨

AND, sometimes the most aligned thing you can do is hit pause.

Not quit.
Just re-align.
And go for it again.

We got this 💪 keep going 🫶

#personaldevelopment #selfexpression #authenticity #mentalhealth #creatorjourney by @jeffyhsu

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4 months ago

Pressing record 🎥 feels vulnerable every time.

Whether I’m talking to the camera or gloving to it, the moment I hit record, the inner critic shows up.

You sound weird. You look weird. Is this even good?

The second I start thinking about all of that, I’m out of flow.

Talking to the camera and gloving to the camera bring up the same challenges. But they also have similar solutions:

Show up. Get in the reps. Stay present. Let it flow. 🌀

So I’m going to practice some “gloving to the camera” during this week cuz I’m excited for EDC 🤗

8/30
#gloving #flowarts #personaldevelopment #vulnerability #edc by @jeffyhsu

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5 months ago

“Good vibes only” was something I used to say all the time.

Now I completely disagree with it.

When we label an emotion as good or bad/right or wrong, we end up shaming ourselves for feeling the ‘wrong’ thing. “Good vibes only” can be toxic positivity. It just teaches us to avoid them.

And here’s the thing about avoidance: what you resist persists.

The ‘bad vibe’ I was trying to bypass would just get louder and louder until I finally turned around and faced it.

Now I practice allowing space for all vibes. I try to not judge it as ‘good’ or ‘bad’.

Because every emotion has a message. And if we can slow down enough to listen, it usually has something important to say.

All vibes welcome here. 🌀

7/30
#mensmentalhealth #emotionalintelligence #personaldevelopment #toxicpositivity #selfdevelopment by @jeffyhsu

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5 months ago

One of the most important questions I ask myself is: will this matter when I’m 80 years old?

It helps me put things into perspective when I’m feeling stressed, stuck, or guilty about something.

Example 1: I had this video planned for Sunday. But I was really enjoying my day off, resting with the family. Asked myself the question. When I’m 80, will it matter that I posted on Sunday instead of Monday? No. So I relaxed and enjoyed the day guilt free.

Example 2: when I first started my business, I was overwhelmed and stuck a lot. I’d procrastinate by going upstairs and just laying with my dog Max. Petting him. Spending time with him. I felt guilty sometimes, like I should be doing something else more important.

Then I asked the question. Will this moment matter to me when I’m 80?

Yes. Every time.

So I let myself be there fully with Max. No guilt.

And usually, once I relaxed into the moment, I’d come out of the funk and get back on track anyway.

This question works both ways. It helps me stress less about the small stuff. And it helps me fully show up for the moments that actually matter. 🌀

6/30
#personaldevelopment #mindfulness #mensmentalhealth #grief #presentmoment by @jeffyhsu

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5 months ago

I used to think making a mistake was wrong or bad.

Growing up, mistakes meant punishment. So I did everything I could to avoid them. And when I inevitably made one, I’d try to hide it. Which caused a whole other set of problems down the road 😩.

Now I understand that mistakes are part of the process. Any time we’re trying something new, growing, expanding, stepping outside our comfort zone, mistakes will happen. That’s not a sign something is wrong. That’s a sign of progress.

Now when I make a mistake I get curious.

Why did this happen? What can I learn from this? What can I do differently next time? How can I love this mistake and be grateful?

Mistakes are not the enemy of growth.

Mistakes are proof that you are growing and changing. 🌀

#mensmentalhealth #personaldevelopment #selfdevelopment #accountability #growthmindset by @jeffyhsu

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5 months ago

4 Rules I follow when practicing flow

Rule 1: Breathe. I used to hold my breath the whole time. Tense, in my head, thinking about what came next or what people thought.

Rule 2: Allow imperfection. The frustration of not being able to move the way I wanted kept me stuck. The moment I let myself be imperfect and experiment, it becomes fun again and flow came back.

Rule 3: Speak nicely to yourself. When I messed up, the negative self-talk got loud. It interrupted everything. Learning to talk to myself with more love made a huge difference.

Rule 4: Express honestly. I used to give light shows based on what I thought other people wanted. Not a real connection. Because I wasn’t showing the real me. Flow is about connection. You can’t connect if you’re not being honest.

These four rules changed my flow practice. They also changed how I move through life.

What’s a rule you follow in your own practice? Lmk below. 👇🌀

#flowarts #gloving #personaldevelopment #mensmentalhealth #selftalk by @jeffyhsu

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5 months ago

I used to believe that keeping the peace was the most loving thing you could do for someone you care about.

If something was bothering me and I knew bringing it up would make you uncomfortable, I thought the right call was to just suck it up and keep it inside.

I honestly thought that was love.

I saw it everywhere growing up. At home. At school. At work. People getting hurt, pretending everything was fine, never really talking about it. All for the sake of keeping the peace.

It might work short term.

But in any long-term, intimate relationship, suppressing your needs only builds resentment. And silence and resentment are the number one killers of relationships.

Not arguments. Not conflict. Silence and resentment.

When we stop talking, that’s when the relationship dies.

Now I believe the most loving thing you can do is speak your truth. And create space for others to speak theirs. Even when it’s uncomfortable.

Not always easy. But I’ll take honesty over easy any day. 🌀

#mensmentalhealth #relationships #personaldevelopment #boundaries #selfdevelopment by @jeffyhsu

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5 months ago

I spent years feeling stuck and burnt out before I connected the dots.

It all traced back to one pattern.

Unable to say no. Always exhausted. Can’t express what I actually need. Quietly resentful. Suffering in silence. Pretending everything’s fine.

The people-pleasing pattern.

I found my way out through men’s work. I hired a coach, joined a community of men doing the real work. That’s where I learned about the nice guy pattern: conflict avoidant, no boundaries, carrying everyone else’s comfort while shoving down your own needs.

Mentorship and community changed everything for me.

That’s why I do this work.

To show people pleasers and nice guys that there’s another way.

My name is Jeff. I’m a personal coach. If any of this resonated, follow along!

Join us on this journey.

It’s always easier together. 🌀
#mensmentalhealth #personaldevelopment #lifecoach #mentorship #community by @jeffyhsu

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5 months ago

I kind of failed my last 30-day posting challenge.

I showed up every day. Finished the challenge. Got the prize money.

AND

I still felt like I failed to say the thing.

I was scared to talk about my business. Scared to talk about my work as a coach. Scared to say out loud that I believe mentorship and community is the fastest way out of self-doubt, anxiety, and depression.

So I signed up for another one.

30 days. Talking head videos. Every day.

My goal this time is to actually say the thing. No shrinking. No playing it safe. No dancing around it to avoid judgment or discomfort.

I used to joke that I didn’t understand why anyone would pay money to run a marathon when you can just go outside for free.

Now I get it.

Hard things are easier together.

That’s why I believe in community. That’s why I believe in mentorship.

Day 1. See you tomorrow. 🌀
#mensmentalhealth #personaldevelopment #lifecoach #mentorship #community by @jeffyhsu

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5 months ago

First round matchup w/ @ghangasrath_ at the 2026 Space City Gloving Competition (SCGC)

Got eliminated first round.. There are definitely things I would do differently next time, but honestly? I had so much fun.

I’m proud of myself for showing up and putting my name in the hat.

I typically choose to sit on the sidelines, but I’m grateful I stepped onto the field this time 😊

The matchup was safe + friendly but also competitive + challenging. Grateful to be paired with such a dope partner and to make a new friend 🙏 @ghangasrath_ killed his performance and got me giggling (and the crowd roaring) when he threw his glove down 😂

I love this community. The light shows. The conversations. The connections. Watching how everyone prepared and showed up in their own way.

Left Houston feeling inspired to keep pushing and expanding my game 🌀

More reflections coming soon.

Thank you thank you 🙏 to everyone who supported me through this process. I felt so much love at every step. Grateful to have such amazing souls around me 🙏🫶

Huge shoutout to @glow_leds and everyone involved for putting this together. Y’all create the space for magic like this to happen 🙌✨

#gloving #flowarts #scgc2026 #flowcommunity #gruvy by @jeffyhsu

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6 months ago