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Jessica Bottaro

@jessbottaro

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Nurturing two young hearts to shine bright with kindness ✨
Walking through my grief & celebrating my mother’s memory every day 🪽🦋

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by @jessbottaro

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14 days ago

Man, time is wild- only 1 month left until the 1st year has passed without my beautiful Mama on earth. In this year, I’ve felt and learned a LOT. One of the most profound things I realized is how my mother’s spirit can utilize certain conduits of energy to come through to me and say “Hi darling daughter, I’m right here with you”. While I was cleaning out her house this summer, I took a bath, lit a bunch of candles in her candleholders, and in that moment watching the flames, I could very strongly feel her presence and her energy. It was almost tangable- like hearing her voice in the flickers of the candle flame. 9 months later and lighting candles is still the strongest energetic connection I feel to her (which is hilariously ironic given how much my mom LOVED her fires -I swear the woman would find any excuse to sit outside and burn shit around the fire pit😂🥲) I haven’t felt much creative pull in the last year but picking up one of her candleholders last night and lighting a candle for her inspired me to do a little spontaneous improv and “dance” with my mama in her newest & strongest form🥹🪽🕯️ by @jessbottaro

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4 months ago

Just a gal ina tree 🌿 by @jessbottaro

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6 months ago

My world ❤️ by @jessbottaro

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8 months ago

POV: the year is 2001. Train has just released “Drops of Jupiter” and it’s your mother’s favorite song… her ultimate obsession. Every time we drive in the car she has it cranked full blast singing every single word perfectly off key 😂She even ends up going to see Train in concert— singing the song along live with them like the rockstar she is. Jump to 2025. Your mother has suddenly just passed. All the sudden you’re sitting at the funeral home making plans for her memorial. You’re asked about a song playlist. “What the fuck” is all you can think… “I’m living out my worst nightmare and I’m being asked to curate a fucking playlist while seeing my mom’s ashes posed in an urn up between flowers”…like any of this is normal?! Just utter shock. Somehow the song crosses your mind over the next day— so you email your funeral director (10/10 did not anticipate this scenario on my 2025 life bingo card— not fun do not recommend). A few weeks later you come across a random IG post explaining how the singer wrote Drops of Jupiter for his mother when she passed away. This hits me like a punch to the heart. I always knew the song was about missing someone who had passed, but I never knew it was written from a son for his mother 🥹 How imperfectly perfect that one of my mom’s all time favorite songs holds such a deep meaning and is now the ultimate tribute. I can’t tell you how many times I heard her sing this song at the top of her lungs. I thank god for those memories cuz I can still hear it loud and clear in my mind. Mom, you were always my biggest fan when it came to supporting my dancing. I hope you get a perfect front row seat to watch me from heaven. I’ll never stop making you proud. 1…2…3 more momma Ps: also I hope you got a set of some killer pipes to sing with in heaven mom lol you joked about being a bad singer all your life but the truth is you couldn’t have been any more perfect. Oh, and you always loved the part about the deep fried chicken so I hope you have endless amounts of that in heaven too. by @jessbottaro

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a year ago

by @jessbottaro

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a year ago

Never will I come to understand it— if love could’ve saved you, you would’ve lived forever. Miss you so much mommy🪽 #grief #griefandloss #griefjourney by @jessbottaro

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a year ago

Our last photos taken together at the airport before you left LA, never could I imagine only 3 days later you would leave this earth. Tears in my eyes already because I was sad for you to go mama. We had such a good trip together, you spent such meaningful and special time with your grand babies, and Adam and I. Cooking meals, cuddling while watching movies, going to parks and on walks. Moments I’ll cherish for the rest of my time here on earth. Life is beautiful yet cruel at the same time. I don’t think I’ll ever understand why this happened so I can’t focus on that but what I will do is keep your vivacious, loving, fun & warm spirit alive in myself and everything I do. To the moon and back forever my sweet Mama. 1…2…3 MORE 🩵 by @jessbottaro

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a year ago

Everything is a blur. All I know is my life will never be the same without my mom by my side. There’s so many beautiful pictures and videos of her. This is just the first quick slideshow my phone made. I will be trying to get more together when I feel a little more grounded. If you knew my mom, then you knew love. by @jessbottaro

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a year ago

32 🩵✨ by @jessbottaro

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2 years ago

Serving lewks with my Sonshine✨💕☀️ by @jessbottaro

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2 years ago

Been a while🎀✨ by @jessbottaro

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2 years ago