Instagram story viewer> @kslaxdad> Posts

Keith “The Kernel” Sanders

@kslaxdad

90

followers

103

following

Randolph Macon ‘05
Lacrosse dad who loves beer🍻 and #thecreatorsgame None of that lefty Biden bullshit flies on my page though #FuckPaulsLiberalLeauge

POSTS STORIES REELS TAGGED

With the 250th coming up 🇺🇸 I thought it would be a good time for a throwback to when the guys and I Won the ‘09 Jersey Shore Open and got absolutely S-Faced😵 at the shore. We dominated all tournament until our starting goalies STD test came back negative and he had to head home. Still ended up winning the thing though, however, turns out we accidentally signed up for the 16U division😅 so they stripped our title after I paralyzed FCA’s starting FOGO #charminsoft😂. We went to the bars immediately after the game, hounding as much ❄️ and booze as we possibly could🐶⛄️#snowhounds. I damn near OD’d after I did a line off of some chicks pussy #worthit 😂. We didn’t make it back to the condo that night tho😅 my buddy Jeremy got himself some allegations and got us kicked out🤦‍♂️ I ended up sleeping with some chick from the boardwalk though🦴#pssylvr. Boy my cock felt like hot lava the next day but I ended up being alright #jerseychicks😅😮‍💨. I love this country so much, repeal all taxes on alcohol, Happy 4th, Vance 2028🇺🇸 taken in Jersey Shore by @kslaxdad

5

1

3 months ago

#BackInTime to ‘04 to when the boys and I took an away trip up to Denison. We ended up losing the on field battle in OT, after the candy ass ref ejected me for putting rocks in my gloves #gamesgonesoft. Luckily the true battle was far from over. We hit the town harder than ever, it wasn’t just beers and bag, it was the whole f’ing luggage compartment#nosenachos. We were dodging chicks left and right, when Denison’s entire starting lineup walked in #goldmine. It was instant chaos, haymakers everywhere, the whole team saw red and zeroed in on their captains, almost sent those f*gs to the lord, but the fun police broke it up right after I put their starting goalie to sleep😴.The rest of the night is a blur, but we somehow ended up at a speakeasy with some of my buddies from the Uganda Trip #buisnessconnections. 💯🥍❄️ taken in Denison University by @kslaxdad

5

0

8 months ago

#TBT when I got picked up by Estonia Lacrosse thanks to my great aunt Greta #maygodresthersoul. The boys and I ended up losing to some backwards commie shits from cumragstan or whatever#dontrecall. However this is when the real game started. We made the club bathrooms look like a god damn cornstarch factory. One week straight without a wink of sleep, living on pow and vodka, and having the time of our lives. Took the last pic after my buddy spent 5 minutes in the bathroom with a Croatian h00ker(#crazybitches) let’s just say he didn’t make it back to the hotel that night. #MakeEstoniaGreatAgain taken in Tallinn, Estonia by @kslaxdad

9

0

10 months ago

Me and my newborn son Lucas decided to do some #FatherSonBonding and get #Nuked on a Saturday afternoon. But some #Libsbit thought it would be a good idea to get me kicked out for having my son with me. I’ll keep it simple and say it didn’t end well for him. Ended up just hitting the wall with Lucas instead. #LibsRuinEverything#Booze#LaxdadThings taken in Liberal Stupidity by @kslaxdad

15

0

3 years ago

Throwback to #KONY2012 when me and the guys coached a team of Ugandan villagers to stop Kony’s regime. Let’s just say we dominated, had this one kid named Ngolo drop back to back hattys in the playoffs. Problem was the other teams coach was some warlord asshole named Joseph, So when we went up 7-2 in the chip he immediately kidnapped ngolo and forced him play X-Attack. Still ended up winning though and our goalies mom was more than thrilled to give the boys a #Reward for the win. After the tourney me and the guys got absolutely #Shitfaced off some moonshine from a plastic barrel #KONY2012#LacrosseAfrica#Booze by @kslaxdad

5

1

3 years ago

Little flick of me and Suzie back when we’re at Pearl Harbor(#911Neverforget) Right before Me and the guys got absolutely #shitfaced and @caleb2nastyyyyy pissed on a memorial for fallen soldiers. Let’s just say he got #arrested but the cop was an absolute #Boozehound so he let him off the hook. He ended up inviting some of his buddies from the station(#BlueLivesMatter) And we lit up the second most smoke in Pearl Harbor history🥴. woke up outside the bar the next day feeling better than ever though#pearharborwasntreal#FuckD2 #BlueLivesMatter#Boozehound by @kslaxdad

6

3

3 years ago

The keeper at my son’s rec league game went down with a #nutshotinjury and the backup was reciving treatment for lukemia(#vaccinedidthis) so I decided to hop in net for the half. Let’s just say I dominated, Had 10 saves in a blowout victory and collapsed the X-Attackmans ribs when he tried to crease dive.#ageisjustanumber by @kslaxdad

3

0

3 years ago

Got the big fella out playing some of the #creatorsgame. Back in the day this guy was dominating division III as a gritty, hard nosed D-Middie. Wish there were more studs like this guy playing nowadays. #MakeLacrosseGreatAgain taken in Gaza,Palestine by @kslaxdad

3

1

3 years ago