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💌 by @kyaakp
10
5 months ago
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How would you like to be remembered after you die? It’s a question that has lingered with me for years. I don’t think of myself as a narcissist, but I can’t deny the curiosity of it, what parts of me people would carry with them, what fragments of me would outlive my body. I found myself returning to this question more deeply after losing my grandfather. Trying to describe him feels almost impossible. How do you compress a life so loud, so generous, so unapologetic into words? My fondest memory of him is still vivid: a row of mothers waiting for the school bus, and there he was the lone man among them, my dadu, waiting to scoop me up after school. Both my parents worked so my afternoons belonged to my grandparents, and my dadu filled them with a kind of care that didn’t need to be spoken.

He loved food with the passion of a child, though he always feared what my dadi would say when he sneaked in too many desserts. He was oddly obsessed with WhatsApp statuses believing, in all innocence, that every status he saw was shared just with him and no one else. He was a feminist in the truest sense, always ready in the evening to get the groceries on his way back from the gurudwara. That walk should have taken ten minutes, but with his extroverted spirit, it stretched to an hour because every two minutes, he’d stop to greet a friend and give them ten minutes of his undivided time. He loved living. Even when his voice failed him in the last two months, his willpower never did. He adored being photographed always dressing up, striking a pose, and sending the pictures to his close ones on WhatsApp. And everyone still remembers his birthday ritual: going to bed at 10, setting an alarm for midnight, and wishing people sharp at 12 with his signature message “Putta Mata di Asees.” He loved weddings, loved dancing, loved an audience. Even at 73, he was unstoppable managing his chores, knowing a guy for every inconvenience, still the most resourceful person in any room.

No wonder more than 400 people showed up to his antim ardaas on a Monday morning. My masi said there would’ve been at least a thousand had it been a weekend. That was the size of his presence, royal by @kyaakp
44
a year ago
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