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Lacey Dean | Life Coach

@laceydeancoaching

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Daughter of a triple diagnosed narcissist • Complex Trauma Survivor • Courageous explorer of Grief • Unraveling beauty in the mess & hope to the dark

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Thank you in advance.

With love,
A really sad sister

#suddenloss #grief #siblingloss by @laceydeancoaching

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25 days ago

Reminders to my aching heart, maybe they can sit with yours too💗

•You are allowed to feel this much anger and there are safe ways to do it. Go to the rage room. Scream in the car. Move. Let it move you and refine what needs to burn.

•You are still a safe person and you’re still allowed to fall apart. Break wide open. Feel it all.

•You can sit on the floor for as long as you need to.

•There’s no time or timeline. Existing is a monumental task. I’m proud of you.

•If you sit with any feeling long enough, it’s always rooted in love. Somehow, someway. And sometimes it’s easier to feel mad than acknowledge how deeply the sadness goes.

•You are safe to feel this. You can learn how to feel this. This weight is so heavy.

•No one ‘gets it’ because no one has your heart. Grief is individual, which can feel very isolating. But doesn’t have to be. You are not alone.

•We will hurt people and people will hurt us. I do not need to burn down my life to feel safe. How do I own my piece and repair well, and how do I find the ground again (therapy, grief support, journaling, exercise, talking).

•Share your heart with the people who can hold it. It is the most twisted intimacy to be the only one witnessing the breaking. You are on sacred, rocky ground. It’s raw and twisty and that’s okay.

Place your hand on your heart and repeat:
“I am here.
I will love you through every wave.
I will sit with you in the mud as long as you need.
I will hold your aching heart. I see you.
Everything has changed, yet everything is ‘the same’.
And somehow we’re still here.
I will not shy away from the love you hold in grief.”

I will love you forever, big brother.
I will miss every opportunity I didn’t take.
Every text, call I would do anything to have back.
I wish I told you more how much you meant to me.
I will let this teach and transform me. I will not harden my heart.

I will be better because you lived. AND this sucks more than words could ever describe.

I am so sorry for your loss.

#grief #siblingloss #loss #grieving by @laceydeancoaching

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23 days ago

My content (over all platforms) has reached over a million people this month. My brain can’t even compute it.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you for growing, for trying, for showing up messy even if you feel like you have nothing left. Thank you for feeling and courageously seeking even when your heart has shattered. Thank you for allowing me serve you. It is the privilege of my life to see you reach this freedom too.

#healing #cptsd #fyp #ptsd #innerchild #innerchildwork #contentcreators taken in Washington D. C. by @laceydeancoaching

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a year ago

The biggest lie I have ever believed was that I had to earn my right to be here, to love and be loved, to be “enough” in the eyes of others.

You are HERE.
And you are enough because you are YOU.
That is never up for debate.
Please, live. Please, be free.

#siblingloss #grieving #grief #siblinggrief by @laceydeancoaching

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8 days ago

Questions to ponder on Grief and control:

Do I feel like I have to ‘like’ or ‘agree’ with a situation (like loss of a loved one) to ‘accept’ and to feel it?
What emotional impact does lack of control have on my reality and experience of it?
What is my anger covering? What is it protecting me from feeling?
How does taking accountability for them distract me from taking accountability of myself?
If I really looked at the thing I’m avoiding, what would it say about me/life?
How does control show up for me?
Do I feel safe to let go, why and why not?

Sending you the most love in this twisty ride.

#grief #griefandloss #siblingloss #peoplepleaser by @laceydeancoaching

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15 days ago

Nothing could compare to pain like this.

#siblingloss #grief #grieving #complexgrief by @laceydeancoaching

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16 days ago

Survivors, this is a safe space to burn it all down. To be angry. To feel. To express. To grieve. I see you, I am you, you are safe with me.

The world does not protect us, we protect us. We must never allow ourselves to be separated from our voice, our essence or our power. SA robs us; our safety, perspective, identity, self-trust, trust in anyone.. literally everything.

I am so sorry you have endured the most horrendous things.
I’m so sorry you’ve had to learn how to be safe in your own body again.
I am so sorry you had to continue to live and shove it down.
I am so sorry you still jump when someone you love moves too fast.
I am so sorry no one really understands how hard you had to work just to pick up the pieces of yourself, let alone be questioned about it.
I’m so sorry our system has failed people, women, children. We have failed you.
I am so sorry no one stopped it when you couldn’t. I am so sorry no one stopped it when they could.
I am so sorry you are here.

It was never your fault. Consent can be taken back at any time, no questions asked. This is not your fault. This is not who you are. This is who THEY ARE. Let these monsters rot in the hell they create for themselves.

I am sure of your strength, your rage, and the power righteous anger has to move mountains. But those mountains are not your job to move.

Feel, honor, grieve, and reclaim what’s always been yours. You deserve safety and healthy, honor and respect.

There is no excuse for the deepest form of betrayal and entitlement. I am so sorry.

#cornell #cornelluniversity #grief #survivor by @laceydeancoaching

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16 days ago

Parts of me died with him, too.

#siblingloss #suddendeath #grief #ptsd #loss by @laceydeancoaching

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a month ago

He won’t be known by my future kids.
He won’t be there the day I get married (physically).
So many people won’t hear his laugh. See how he smiled.
He can’t build anything new.

He was such a good human.

He was real.
This sucks, and it’s so real.
And he will continue to be real in us because we loved him.

I’d love to hear about your people.

#grief #suddendeath #siblingloss #siblinggrief #loss by @laceydeancoaching

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a month ago

Just saying.

#grief #siblingloss #perspective by @laceydeancoaching

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a month ago

Your grief is yours, it’s sacred. And it all sucks, too.

#grief #loss #siblingloss #suddendeath by @laceydeancoaching

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a month ago

What makes you, you?

#grief #loss #suddendeath #adhd by @laceydeancoaching

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a month ago