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Mia Shurden

@ohmiamy5

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a disgruntled pelican
on kumeyaay land / san diego ☀️

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Today is a hard today. Today is OUR birthday. OUR special day together. I can’t believe it has already been a whole year without you. I am not exactly sure how I made it through (not very gracefully that’s for sure) and I can’t even imagine another year going by. I miss you every single moment of every single day. Happy Birthday Dad. I love you with all of my heart.

I’ve been trying to write this post for a year and I just haven’t been able to do it. Trying to convey to you just how wonderful, loving, and fucking cool he was. I have written so many drafts but it all feels too personal. The words are for me, not you. Most of you didn’t know him, he was mine not yours. I’m not ready to share and probably never will be. But I will leave you with a piece from a note my mom wrote me...

“Mia I cannot describe the joy you have brought to us as parents. From the moment we learned of the pregnancy. We did not think children were an option for us. When I told your father he literally lit up like a light bulb! This began the special relationship between you and your father especially being born on his birthday. He said it was the greatest gift he could ever receive. You were a miracle to us.” by @ohmiamy5

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6 years ago

I’ll miss you mom. I’m happy you’re finally at peace and reunited with dad ❤️ by @ohmiamy5

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10 months ago

5 years ago I celebrated a new decade while simultaneously mourning the most excruciating loss. “Over the past years, I’ve done nothing but search for him, rifling through my memories and piecing them together. I spent my time chasing him, in breathless pursuit, during which time I was torn between regret and remorse, certainty and doubt. There’s no doubt that searching for someone means searching for oneself. It’s a desire to make peace with oneself. Death raises more questions than it answers.” taken in Machu Picchu by @ohmiamy5

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2 years ago

scenes from @carlyboos charming los feliz apartment. ft. tiny noodle tail. not pictured: fluffy butt. by @ohmiamy5

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3 years ago

slow mornings ✨ taken in Portland, Maine by @ohmiamy5

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4 years ago

☀️ taken in Tucson, Arizona by @ohmiamy5

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4 years ago

☀️ taken in Saguaro National Park, Tucson by @ohmiamy5

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5 years ago

☀️ taken in San Diego, California by @ohmiamy5

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5 years ago

happy birthday. there is no one else id rather creepily hide in the shadows and take pictures of. taken in Saguaro National Park, Tucson by @ohmiamy5

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5 years ago

The Galleta Meadows metal sculptures are very cool. taken in Borrego Springs Sculptures by @ohmiamy5

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6 years ago

View from our favorite desert campsite. Same view, different times of day. taken in Anza-Borrego Desert State Park by @ohmiamy5

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6 years ago

Running away to the desert has been our favorite quarantine activity. Finding a hidden palm oasis & camping with no humans around for miles... doesn’t get much better than that. taken in Anza-Borrego Desert State Park by @ohmiamy5

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6 years ago