kat moulder

I knew it was going to be challenging rebuilding my life in another country alone.
I knew it would be painful walking away from a relationship I loved and built.
I knew it would be uncomfortable living off my life’s savings.
I knew it would be scary and lonely and frustrating at times.
I knew changing careers and reinventing my human identity meant a-lot of adjusting, adapting, and pushing past self doubt.
That’s why I procrastinated doing it for almost a year.
The procrastination made it significantly more painful than it needed to be.
If only I could have just let go and surrendered.
But I kept holding on, one foot in and one foot out.
Until the decision was made for me, a loving gift I needed, and I jumped with both feet.
What I could not have known was the amount of love and support the universe would gift me upon landing.
I heard this voice that kept telling me I needed to make the move.
The voice said, this isn’t it, keep going.
I was stagnating in a city and a life that was no longer nourishing my souls growth in the ways I needed.
I was on an endless search for my dream life.
I wrote a list last year before I left of all the things I wanted my dream life to have.
Baja is giving that to me.
But I also realized along the way I have to build it.
I have to nurture it.
I have to commit.
I have to dedicate time and energy and a lot of trust.
I have to be patient. More patient than I know how to be.
My intuition was already telling me, everything else was negotiation with fear.
Fear of the unknown.
Fear of regret.
Fear of failing.
But here I am.
Perfectly imperfect.
Learning. Trusting. Healing. Growing.
Looking at life through a new lens.
Often upside down.