Ilalang Dzahira Anwar

Lately I've been playing Dark Souls Remastered and it got me thinking about the way fate, longing, hopelessness, and spirit intertwine. Looking back, I think I had a pretty good run. Days chock-full of life, pens chock-full of thoughts. Now it hasn't been much, and I myself am surprised to realize that it can be a good thing too. Simply putting one foot in front of the other can be the most audacious thing you do. Did I miss it? Yeah. But more than that, I am glad it actually happened. A friend of mine told me that he's been keeping track of his small wins out there. Finally bought an iPod. Read a few pages every week. Walked to an ice cream store and saw the sunset on his way back. Counting your blessings. Another friend sent me some pictures of her train trip in India. Mountain ranges, swathes of land. They didn't look too different from the scenery out here in Indonesia. Received a YouTube link to someone's gamelan recital. I had to pause my Artemis livestream the other day just to watch him play all the way from Pittsburgh with his uni friends. Life goes on. There's so much stuff going on in the world and maybe it serves as a reminder that you should go on too. Get out of your head. Leave everything in yesterday. World Cup euphoria is brewing, even though I don't particularly watch soccer. But I know my dad does. So do a lot of my friends. So does everyone else I passed by in my local market, bus station, and alleyways. Knicks in 5. Kids getting riled up every time I say 6-7. As long as I have something in my pocket to make sure that I 8, 9 times out of 10 I should worry less and embrace more.

Crispy garlic squid with confit cloves and red beans over rice, homemade sambal, and a hand-rolled botanical blend of dried flowers and herbs. April 2024. 🥗🌾