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rich

@richieballing

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📍Moving around
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⛰️Big time hiker
🍁ESF '28
@richiebugging
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I’ve always struggled with who I am as a person. It often feels as though I am a completely different man to each person in my life. The other day, a close friend asked me, “Do you love life?” They said that someone would have to love every part of their life in order to be as energetic and passionate as me. This made me chuckle, because in my mind I’m still the shy kid surrounded by people he’s too scared to talk to. I could name 30 people in my life that still view me in that light as well. However, I could name another 30 people who think I am one of the most outgoing people they have ever met. Everyone in my life attributes a different label or personality to me and I frequently ponder why that is. Why is every description so divergent? The more I wonder, the more confused I become. Who am I? Am I the person who sits silently, just happy to be there? Am I the guy who approaches everyone, looking to make new friends? Am I the one who brings smiles to nearby faces, or the one who tries too hard to be funny? Is it possible to be everything at once? When I’m gone, everyone will have a vastly disparate memory of me. If every memory contradicts one another, are any of them even true? Sometimes I feel like I’m simply putting on a performance while my true self hides away in a room I cannot enter. I told them yes, but it is much more complicated than that. by @richieballing
Just graduated 🥳🦉🐛 Two years have passed, but I am still Richie. I still enjoy losing myself in the woods. I still love spending time with my friends, and I still value the time I have all to myself. I still admire the small details in nature, such as the lines in tree bark and the little pebbles inside of conglomerate rocks. I still am fascinated by every single human being around me. I still laugh louder than anyone in the room, and I still sulk when that room becomes empty. I still drive until I run out of gas, and I still cry at stoplights. I still worry about what my future holds for me. I still have hope. I still watch the birds come and go with the seasons. I still can't differentiate two Sparrow species. I still think about my old friends. I still wish I did more for them. I still would welcome them back into my life with open arms, for better or for worse. I still live the same life and carry the same name, but some people know me as Rich. Others know me as Richard. One might even call me Rick. Despite these different appelations, I still know who I am. I am Richie. If you see me again, do not leer at me and wonder how I metamorphosed, for I have not transformed. If I appear chameleonic, please realize that I only discover new fashions in which to express the same personality. by @richieballing

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