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My So-Called Career

@socalledcareer

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Today is world suicide prevention day, and while I’m not qualified to help prevent suicide in any meaningful way, I do have thoughts on how to help people who have been bereaved by suicide come through it and grow their lives around it (not get over it, as I don’t think that ever happens).

My mum died by suicide, as did her own mother, and it’s still one of the worst and most shocking things that has ever happened to me. For far too many years after, I thought it was my fault. That if I had been a better daughter, checked in more often, paid more attention, been more supportive, been a different person, in a different place at a different time, things would have been different. The guilt I felt was off the charts and instead of kindness and compassion for myself, I channelled it into anger at my mum, and fear that me or one of my sisters would somehow meet the same end.

I don’t feel that way any longer.

There is a lot of posting today about how we should check more, care more, talk more, be more pro-active and I don’t disagree for a second that as a society we could and should be more curious, compassionate and caring.

But some suicides would sadly have happened, and even more sadly will continue to happen, no matter how many knots the people who loved and supported those who take their lives contort themselves into.

If you’ve been bereaved by suicide, I hope you can talk about it sooner than I could, and offer yourself the compassion I lacked. Guilt, shame and fear are tough to chip away at, but it’s worth it.

I had this tattoo in part to honour my mum’s memory. But mainly to honour me, and how proud I am of myself for coming through it, building a life for myself, and knowing that there was nothing I could have, or should have done.

#suicideprevention by @socalledcareer

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a month ago

Enjoying my first summer by the sea. by @socalledcareer

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2 months ago

LOOK AT MEEEEEE!!!

The amazing @mooie_fee took stunning photos of us all at the Beach Business Babes event she hosted with Della Driscoll.

This pic took seconds to set up but absolutely captured all the things that are most me about me.

Love. Love. Love. by @socalledcareer

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3 months ago

A quick heads up for tomorrow’s issue of Work-ish, the newsletter from My So-Called Career.

It is maternity month - inspired by the 3 of my clients due to give birth this month who have really been cursing the heatwave - and it is crammed full of wise words of advice, encouragement and inspiration for working mothers, mothers to be, and women who aren’t quite there yet but hope to be someday.

Not a mother and wondering if this is for you?
Hold that thought. These are your friends, colleagues, co-workers and family members and everyone benefits if you have more insight into what might be going on for them and how you can make it that little bit easier.

Our ‘thinking’ episide, landing in inboxes tomorrow morning features

> Brilliant stories on motherhood from @harrietwrightuk @join.branch , @hannahray @es_laura__ and @jaxbischof

> A whole bookshelf of reading recommendations.

> Organisations that have your back when you need it.

and our ‘doing’ episode in 2 weeks time has

> Advice from @rachelarthur @fedecherubini @katyzack and possibly my favourite ever words of wisdom from @nessajanex

> How to set yourself up for success on your return from maternity leave from women who have been there.

> Coach Yourself Questions to help you navigate one of life’s gnarliest transitions with kindness and pragmatism.

If you aren’t already a subscriber, head over to substack now (link in bio) so that all this collective wisdom lands seemlessly in your inbox.
And if you know someone who needs this, share this post so they can benefit too.

You will not regret it.
PJ by @socalledcareer

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3 months ago

This month’s WORK-ish is all about CURIOSITY.

What are you curious about? is so much less stressful than what are you passionate about?

and from a careers perspective it gives so many more jumping off points.

So prepare to put in your thinking caps and get curious with me tomorrow.

Hitting your inboxes at 8am.

Still time to subscribe now - the link is in my bio. by @socalledcareer

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4 months ago

Spring equinox sunrise.
Worth getting out of bed at 5am for but I could not get up that early in the regular.
Genuinely don’t know how early birds function past midday. by @socalledcareer

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7 months ago

WORK-ish is back, and this month it is all about people.

No matter what you do or who you do it for, you almost certainly have to rub along with a bunch of other folks along the way.

Here’s your guide to navigating the highs and lows of other people with grace and humour (or at very least not pushing someone off a cliff for their 20 minute meeting monologues)

🧡 Read and subscribe at the link in bio.
And I know you have stories – what is the most classic “oh my god I am about to absolutely lose my 💩” experience you’ve had (where you both lived to tell the tale!)

#Workish #MySoCalledCareer #WorkingRelationships #brilliantjerks #jerksatwork workwives by @socalledcareer

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7 months ago

Swam in the sea and howled at the moon.
2026, I am ready for you.
But gently please! taken in Mermaid Beach by @socalledcareer

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9 months ago

Ever noticed how confidence sometimes wobbles after the big change, even more than before it?

You make the move. Take the job. Shift the pace. Then suddenly you’re second-guessing everything from your choices to your name.

November’s edition of Work-ish is all about the wobble - the transition no one prepares you for. Not the change itself, but the bit after where your brain hasn’t caught up yet. Where you feel like you should be “on it” but your legs are running in opposite directions.

If you’ve been feeling unfocused, unsure, or even verging on unhinged you’re not failing. Confidence grows inside the wobble, not after it.

This newsletter unpacks what that actually looks like - tiny steps, small wins, imperfect action, and, just like Bambi, learning to move before you feel fully formed.

🔗If that feels familiar, have a read. Link in the bio to subscribe and support.

Enjoy! by @socalledcareer

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a year ago

This weekend I headed off on a brilliant group hike.

Here we all are, before, after and halfway through - great big grins, 3 four-legged friends, and THE BEST weather.

Throughout the day I met people who worked as…

property manager for a global charity
project manager in games development
art therapist
sex therapist
charity worker and ADHD coach in training
social enterprise founder - via banking tech and interior design
manager of an animal sanctuary
care home worker for children and teens
behavioural scientist

Such a wealth of career paths and experiences, and so many with shifts and changes of course along the way.
It really was a joy to learn so much about so many so-called careers and be surrounded by people so willing to indulge my work-nerdery.

When we restrict ourselves to sector specific networking, or role related communities, we can close out minds to just how much possibility is out there.

Don’t forget to consider connecting around a shared interest part of your work-ish activity to open up new horizons.

And remember that connecting can happen anywhere - it doesn’t have to look like a networking event to count. by @socalledcareer

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a year ago

This month’s Work-ish is all about change.
Moving on. Moving toward something new - even if you’re not quite sure what that is yet.

I’ve finally made it out of London to my new house by the sea, and have been reflecting on what happens after the change, when you’re in that weird in-between space - the one where the good stuff happens.

🧠 Tools, a book, simple thought exercises - and an update on state of my unpacking - are all in the October newsletter.

🔗 Link in bio to read + subscribe.

#realworktalk #careerchange #mscc #workish #careeradvice #mysocalledcareer taken in Folkestone Harbour by @socalledcareer

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a year ago

Stand behind the yellow line please!

Commuting back to London today for clients, co-working and a trip to the theatre tonight.

And I remembered to make my packed lunch too 🥪🍏

How are you starting your week? by @socalledcareer

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a year ago