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Miss Suzanne, LMSW

@synthpopulist

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🌸 virtual visual diary 🌸
Endo 4 survivor living with CRPS
✨🪄✍🏻🧠🤝❤️‍🩹🪴🪶✨

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The ancestors are pleased ✨🥰🦋💐 by @synthpopulist

Porter - my son and life partner - had surgery on Monday to remove a cancerous tumor that quickly appeared under his front right arm.

He had been off for maybe a month or six weeks, and i had initially treated him herbally for what were mild upper respiratory symptoms, but then this emerged.

The vet recommended against biopsying it, since that would be another expensive charge…. Being disabled means watching every penny. But he was fairly positive of the diagnosis.

I asked about treatment and he shook his head. It’s not that it can’t be treated. It’s more that it is very impractical. And likely out of my price range. And… likely terrible for Porter Cat.

I think he is going to be okay for a while. I think he still has some time left. But…. But.
I see the rainbow in the sky.

I know some of you have had losses of some very dear animals in your life, and I am so sorry for the emotions this will bring to mind for you. But i know at the end of that rush, you will ultimately smile through your tears.

These precious little souls, these gorgeous, soft, wiggling little creatures who want nothing more than to please and cuddle and heal us. I am so, SO glad to be in a place where i have worked hard enough on myself to be the calm, reliable presence he needs, even as I struggle. This is the true healing.

Sending love to everyone. I miss you. I just got through another period of really challenging flares, as well as further doctor mishaps. But I’m back, as always.

And, if I have ever touched your heart or made you laugh, or enriched your life with anything I have shared — won’t you please take a moment to send Porter your best for his healing? It would mean so very much to me. And as he is a perceptive cat, he will undoubtedly feel some of it himself 🥰🥰❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹🥹🥹🙏🙏 by @synthpopulist

Bye!!! Lolol 😉🐸
Happy Summer, darlings.
It’s been a while. How is every little thing?
🦊💕 by @synthpopulist

Are you familiar with self-managed medication abortions? And did you know that certain states have money allocated to specifically help individuals in Arkansas get the help they need?

Check out the lovely women of @ozarkcircleforchoice for more information.

… and never forget that history has shown us that Mutual Aid will get us through anything 🙏❤️🖤💊❤️‍🩹✊🏼 by @synthpopulist

🥹💄🥹💄👏👏👏💗💗💗 by @synthpopulist

Hee hee hee hee heeeheheheheeee
Healing atmosphere, healthy candy, infrared bed, and Gray’s Anatomy?
Perfectly happy soul!
Sending you some love and bliss right now:
Quiet yourself and receive it!! 🙏💗💗💕💕💕

#crps #infrared #massage #nwamassage #graysanatomy #bliss #healing #gratitude #oldfriends #resilience #growth #joy by @synthpopulist

**Edited in 2026 to indicate that I am now fully educated as to the dangers of AI, and no longer support it’s use even for art
#themoreyouknow #itsokaytolearnfromyourmistakes #thatswhatlifeisabout

MetaAI self portraits lol
Inspired by pmeinelnyc

#ai #aiartcommunity #dsm5tr #goth #gothgirl #tabicocatsofinstagram #lol by @synthpopulist

These are called mammatus clouds. They’re found in weakening storm systems and caused by cold air pockets. A plus of tornado alley moving east! ☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️💕

#mammatusclouds #mammatuscloudsunset #tornadoalley #northwestarkansas #historicdowntownspringdale #lovemyhome #climatechange #beautyiseverywhere #appreciationofbeautyandexcellence #viastrengths #crps #successfulcoping by @synthpopulist

New @nytimes article this am …

This topic is eternally on my mind, but especially lately…… so I threw in some recent screen shots I took from @sbsanimal ‘s Animal Farm

(I’m OBSESSED, it’s on YouTube, and there are captions 🥹🥰🙏🐈)

What do you and/or your animal pals have to say about this?!

#animalminds #animallanguage #transpeciescommunication #language #cognition #attachment

#PAINSOMNIA #CRPS #resilience #distresstolerance #pain #ouch #yawn by @synthpopulist

Hi!!!!!!!!!!!!
You can add music to posts now?!?!?
🤩🤩🥰🥰👏👏🤣🤣❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹💕💕
I have a new diagnosis (CRPS) and new, appropriately modified plans for world domination. I will tell you all about it soon (to a background of Shygirl apparently!)
How have y’all been?!?!?!?!?!?
Love you!!! ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹💕💕💕 by @synthpopulist

Silly. Random quick photo pile up before I run out the door. Hi 👋🏻🥰😌🙏🏼❤️‍🩹💕💕
It’s weird I send my art to pals sometimes now haha
#intractablepain #endowarrior #lmsw #cmip #yay #healing #alchemy by @synthpopulist

Is a little funny to be back on here, because July was a real turning point for me and my life is so rich and full now and… healed. Pain is still a thing (I have intractable pain and it isn’t going anywhere but… that’s okay!)
I have a local crew now I worship that worships me in return. I’m about 80% through processing my ex, altho sometimes very late at night or when I first wake up, I can still see into his mind and what he is doing that day (I’ve stopped doing that but sometimes it just happens). I admitted on Facebook that I have visions sometimes (lots of professional and political folks as friends on there) and I made my peace with that by realizing I actually didn’t give two fucks lol.
I miss my endo pals on here and think of them very often - finally had the courage to print out and go thru my surgical notes in full…. They’re literally 1/2 an inch thick (really) and it’s true they kicked someone out of my surgery for not performing well under all of my complex shenanigans.
Also missing those beloveds I had a chance to reconnect with and meet here and am wondering how your lovely lives are unfolding.
Short version is as mentioned that more surgery is coming up and I’m really thriving by channeling my limit energy into acting on and in my immediate space and community. Awww guys we did it and I couldn’t have done it without you. Thanks for being here for me during those awful months just post surgery. 🌸🥰🥰🙏🏼💗💕💕💕🌸 by @synthpopulist