Instagram story viewer> @loris.rayner> Tagged
(@loris.rayner)'s profile avatar HD Profile

@loris.rayner

undefined
POSTS STORIES REELS TAGGED
Exhibits that look like us with the people who made me. ✊🏾 . . . #melaninmagic #artinstitutechicago #elizabethcattlet #museumofcontemporaryartchicago #fireleibáez
2
Download
My parents visited a few weeks ago and it felt like the culmination of a lifelong dream. I have always loved my friends like family. I didn’t have the language for it as a kid but I now know that even then I was treating friends like “found family.” I’ve wanted to tie a line between my found family and my biological family as long as I can remember, and I feel like I’ve finally truly done that. While living in SF, I’ve learned about Andie Nordgren’s concept of “relationship anarchy.” The first tenant is that “love is abundant,” noting that loving someone doesn’t diminish your love for others. Admittedly, there were times in my teens and twenties as I struggled with coming out that I did not communicate my love to my parents very well. I leaned a lot on my found family back then and, understandably, my parents took that personally. I’ve done a lot of work in my thirties to let my parents know they mean the world to me. Part of that has been better integrating my friends with my family. Now, my parents and many of my friends have intersected a number of times, both in Chicago and SF. During this visit from my parents, I took them to the Castro for the first time. Within the first gay bar in the US to have glass walls, a dozen friends came through to meet or hang out again with my parents. I watched as they shared, joked, and laughed as peers. In some cases they were connecting as if they were old friends. I’ve used the terms “found” and “biological family” for about as long as I have been out to distinguish between the two groups. I can happily now say that they all are my “chosen family.” Thank you all for choosing me, too. I love you so much. . . . #chosenfamily #biofamily #foundfamily #sanfrancisco #chicago #twinpeaks #latergram #loveislove
13
Download
A few weeks ago I got to go to Gatlinburg, TN for a family reunion with my grandmother’s grandfather’s people (and my grandma was the oldest present). Eighty members of the Joy family came together to celebrate life, and it was a heck of a time. I learned a lot about family (namely that we all like to put on a show - see the video for a family performance) and have a renewed appreciation for folks in the South. So proud of be a part of this beautiful linage and can’t wait for the next one. . . . #familyreunion #joyfamilyreunion #blackexcellence #melaninmagic #gatlinburg #tennessee #latergram
2
Download
To kids from two to ninety-six, Merry Christmas!🎄❤️ . . . #merrychristmas #merryxmas #xmas2024 #raynerfamilyxmas2024 #chicago #blackexcellence #melaninmagic #homefortheholidays
1
Download
Happy 40th Birthday, @blackflower. As I reflect on the years I’ve shared with you on this planet, I can’t help but think about all the incredible multitudes you contain and manage…mother, super nerd, daughter, trivia guru, Jeopardy contestant, expert hater, Stanford grad, master chef, librarian extraordinaire, Steely Dan super fan, wife…the list goes on. While I may be able to speak to some of these titles, I know that without a doubt, you are the greatest older sister in the multiverse. Authenticity is the quality and value that I hold highest and I get complimented on the most for. You, Ashley, were my first model for this. Thank you for always being yourself. We are all so blessed to have you. A million days in your arms is never too much. I love you. . . . #happybirthday #forty #homefortheholidays #chicago #blackexcellence #melaninmagic #youngerbrother #oldersister
4
Download
Happy 70th Birthday, @loris.rayner! I flew into Chicago to surprise my dad on his birthday yesterday (thankful to my mom and sister for keeping the surprise for so long). He also didn’t know that we got him @janetjackson tickets (the Velvet Rope tour happened to be the first concert my dad took my sister to, which made it feel particularly serendipitous)! After our steak dinner at @swiftandsons, we went to the show and wow! Janet is truly the blueprint for all the pop girlies. Dad said it was one of the best bdays ever! It’s not lost on me that Janet’s tour was called “Together Again.” Lots of folks don’t know that the song was written in part as a tribute from Janet to a queer friend she lost to AIDS and to all people impacted by the disease. Hearing this from thee Black pop icon during Pride month (and on Juneteenth) from the singer herself was incredibly powerful. There were so many queer people in the audience beaming and dancing during this song! What made it even more poignant is that I got to hear it with my immediate family. We aren’t often all together, just the four us, so it was very moving to hear Janet’s words about feelings of togetherness even when you are apart from loved ones. A few days ago my father posted a picture of the two of us for Pride month and mentioned how proud he was of me. This year also marks the first time my parents have called to wish me “Happy Pride” (to be clear, that comment is not an admonition, but a celebration of our growth together). I cried tears of joy in response to those two actions, just like I did during the performance of “Together Again.” It was your special day, but I felt like the special one. You’re always doing that, dad. Im so thankful for you for being at the helm of our family and for being the inspiration for bringing us together. Happy Birthday. And I hope you and mom and sis remember even thought we aren’t always together: “Everywhere I go, every smile I see I know you are there smilin’ back at me Dancin’ in moonlight, I know you are free ‘Cause I can see your star shinin’ down on me” . . . #happy70thbirthday #happybirthdaydad #janetjackson #togetheragaintour #togetheragain #pride2024
12
Download
back to up