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Ocean Storiez

@ocean_storiez

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Every day is hard. The only time I can actually rest my mind and body a little bit is when I sleep in our bed. The bed is extra big now, and I don’t like it. I don’t like waking up because I come back to this new life without you. My mind and heart races, and I replay your last day here with us over and over and over like maybe something will change. That was the hardest and longest day of my life. It’s like you’re everywhere, and no where at the same time. I’m still waiting for you to reverse your truck into the stall and make a funny face or smile at me when our schedules would overlap for a moment and we catch eachother. The kids and I are still waiting for you to walk through the door after work, or after practice. I’m waiting for you to kiss me goodbye on my cheek on your early work weeks when I’m still in bed, and then wait for you to help me get the kids ready for school and drop them off on your later work weeks. I’m waiting for you help me put them to bed while I clean up after cooking and I reset the house. I did the last of your laundry and folded them and put them on your drawer, and hung shirts like I always do, except everything else is in the same spot. Being surrounded by your things brings me comfort and excruciating pain at the same time. Our babies are doing well, thank God, but the grief of knowing nothing will be the same and hoping we all hold on to every last memory with you, just hurts. It was all too fast, too short, too tragic. No time to say goodbye or one more I love you. I wish and pray and pray again, and it feels so heavy to keep moving forward. To stay strong and try to take care of myself. I’m doing this for you, and our babies. I hate being forced to do things I didn’t choose, it’s almost like I’ve already lived a lifetime of this, trauma, loss, and hardship…I can’t believe there was more. Well, we will be here just missing you, and trying to figure out how to live, and do the best we can. I’m so grateful for our 13 years—we’re being held up the best we could be, because of you. I know God has got you, me, us. My faith of a mustard seed will grow, and strengthen. I’ve done it before and I’ll do it again. I love you forever.
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Respect the lifeguards!
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Napali Challenged 26⚔️ All thanks to @ocean_storiez and @hanaleicanoeclub for providing the necessary gear 🙏🤙
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Steady press around the west side of Kauaʻi, 37 miles of legendary coastline from Hanalei to Kekaha. Nāpali challenge complete. Mahalo nui iā @ocean_storiez for providing the gear to keep us safe from the sun and @hanaleicanoeclub for providing one of their wa'a.
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This is Braddah James in his home made Wa’a. He doesn’t have any social media accounts and is native to the rural Ka’ū district of Hawaii island. I’m so stoked on what he does, and am so happy to be apart of it when I can! Every voyage makes for great new #oceanstoriez that radically maximize the stoke of life, and also teach valuable lessons in critical moments. James is a great example for us all of how we can harness the Mana of the ocean to create personal storiez we can have to help us through all walks of life. Mahalo James, and mahalo Ocean Storiez Ohana for creating the ocean attire that complements and perpetuates such a great way of living!
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