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denver, sober, licensed clinical social worker 🌞
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Dirty soda, Spike Lee, white girl, Ice T
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Two weeks ago I DNF’d my first race. While I was mentally and physically prepared to run 50 miles, I was not ready to get hailed on, see a lightning strike feet away from me, and be cold to the bone within the first mile. I’m not disappointed in myself for dropping, it felt like my only choice while I was out there. To be honest, I would have dropped at the second aid station had I not been told I must keep trudging along before I could logistically get off the trail. 

Running is my meditation, my therapy, and my happy place. Turns out, hypothermia doesn’t fit the bill. I’m relatively new to the sport and I hope to keep going for many years to come. To do so, I need to protect my body and my safety comes first. This was just one race, there will be many more…and that is okay. The competitive and perfectionist in me is sad, but I think I prefer my fingers and toes intact. 

A mantra I often remind myself: I don’t have to be perfect to receive support. Coming back to the Airbnb after dropping, with no tears left to cry, only to be surrounded by so much love was really freakin special. 

None of these races have to be that serious. I’m putting myself out there to do some crazy shit, and sometimes crazy shit happens. Now back to lallygagging, eating good food, and cheesing with my good judies.
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There are moments in this process where I have to pause and just sit with what's happening around me.

Last week was one of those weeks. Not because everything went perfectly or because we crossed some major finish line but because I looked up and realized that the seeds planted 18 months ago in the uncomfortable, quiet, nobody is watching part of this journey are blooming all at once. A CBS interview that came through a genuine relationship, investors flying in to see HUMN, working with our architecture and interior design team finalizing our plans, our trail community continuing to show up even though it's getting dark outside, and of course, making time for Odesza.

I left a 14 year career to build this. There were stretches where I genuinely didn't know if it would work. The gap between where I was and where I needed to be felt too wide to close. What I know now is that the work done in those stretches is exactly what created moments like this. You can't manufacture that kind of compounding. You have to trust it while you're in the middle of it and just keep going.

I'm sitting with a lot of gratitude right now. For real. For my family, friends, Odesza, The Trail Club, our partners, advisors, and investors. None of this would be happening without everyone involved.

-O
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End of summer serotonin
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Today, The Trail Club raced the Cirque Series at Arapahoe Basin. We could not have asked for a better day — from the tailgate pre-race, to a beautiful day on course, to finishing up cheering the rest of the racers in. This group crushed it, and we look forward to being back on this course next year!!

Thank you @cirqueseries
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