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The Alcohol Free Couple | Patrick & Xiomara

@theafcouple

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✨It’s a great day to not be hungover✨
🕺4 Years + AF together
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On April 29th 2023, we woke up to some truly terrible news at around 6am.

That Colten, our dear friend and neighbor, had injured himself due to a drunken accident. Patrick called his mom to tell her the news. She was in North Carolina for her niece’s wedding. Patrick then found out the night before a drunk driver had hit and killed Sam (the bride) on her wedding night. Then we found out Colten didn’t make it because of his injuries. We were completely devastated. All before the sun came up.

It was such a terrible morning.

You probably heard the story about Sam all over the news. And thankfully, her killer was sentenced to 25 years. But that doesn’t take away the toll it’s left on the family.

The quieter grieving has been Colten. He did not make national news but it affected our lives deeply. He was young (only 23). I had seen him a few hours before it had happened. I asked him if he needed a ride home. He assured me he was fine. Patrick was on speaker phone and he told him he loved him and I gave him a hug. That was the last time I saw him.

It was so bizarre to us because we had quit drinking just over a year ago and these were both deaths directly related to alcohol. It definitely sealed our commitment to the alcohol free life as both these special people should still be here.

Rest in Peace Sam Miller and Colten Weatherly

#samanthamiller #drinkdriving #alcoholfree #alcoholawareness #coltenweatherly by @theafcouple

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6 months ago

Five ways to handle disappointment alcohol free! 👋

I don’t know about you, but growing up it was normal to see handling disappointment with drinking. Sometimes life is tough! You go through a break up, don’t get the job you want or deal with losing someone.

When I feel most triggered after 4+ years alcohol free, it’s usually after my security is rocked. Think primal evolutionary psychology 👉🏽 Housing, resources, money, core people, love etc. are all part of your foundation and security. When important things like these are rocked, life can feel really uncertain!

Throughout my 20s, my habit was reaching for an alcoholic beverage to feel better. And while there is nothing inherently wrong with drinking alcohol, it often doesn’t help the situation. It’s easy to numb out and forget but are you really taking a moment to relax, reflect, grieve and figure out what went wrong and how to move forward?

Here are some things I did to handle my disappointment instead of drinking alcohol:

Went for a walk. Spent time alone. Went to a party, drank alcohol free options and danced. Went for a run. Wrote and reflected on what I could do better next time. Canceled plans. Watched TV. Turned off social media. Bought a nice bottle of alcohol free Pinot Noir and made a homemade pasta dinner to go with it 🍝

Everyone handles disappointment differently and at some point, you will probably handle disappointment yourself. What are some of your alcohol free go-tos for handling disappointment? Comment below 👇🏽

Love from the AF couple 🫶🏽

#alcoholfree #lowlights #sobriety #sobercoach #healthylifestyle by @theafcouple

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6 months ago

Celebrating 1500 days alcohol free today! 🥳

We realise we have been quiet on here and here’s a quick update on our lives 🤍

Hoping you all are well and staying hangover free 😎

Love from the AF couple

#alcoholfree #sobriety #alcoholfreecouple #relationshipgoals #sobercurious by @theafcouple

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7 months ago

It’s a great holiday season to not be hungover 🫶🏽

Another year walking around with Santa before Xmas 🎁 Santa loves to pass out treats and fruit to the children before his big night out 🎅

Remember to spread some cheer to others and definitely don’t drink and sleigh 😉🛷💨

Love from the AF couple

#alcoholfree #sobercurious #merrychristmas #sobriety by @theafcouple

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10 months ago

It’s a great Holiday szn to not be hungover!

Coming into our fourth holiday season AF!

1.) Our biggest advise to be honest with your family and friends. Tell them you don’t drink anymore and why - chances are they will understand and if they don’t 👉🏽 🚩 🚩

2) Make note of friends and family members who don’t respect your boundaries or your choices. Reassess if this is healthy for you to continue with the relationship. If you can talk about it with them, great! If not, it’s okay to decide you don’t want to engage or spend time with them.

3) Bring PLENTY of AF drinks and mocktails. A lot of stores close on Xmas and people are loving NAs these days. Our first Xmas there was a full bar but everyone wanted our drinks 😂 It also makes you feel like you’re not missing out and can join in on cheersing. Grab stuff you’re excited about!

4) Do some self care where you spend time doing yoga, journal, breathing, fitness etc so you can pour from a full cup! The holidays can be stressful, make sure to take some time to relax and do something healthy for yourself.

5) Join an AF group online or connect with other alcohol free individuals to keep you on track and talk to them if things get tough 🫶🏽

You got this!

Happy holidays from your favourite AF couple 🫶🏽

#alcoholfree #soberlove #healthyrelationship #boozefree by @theafcouple

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10 months ago

Happy Halloween from the AF couple 🎃

When we first started Halloween-ing* together we were definitely drinking back then 🙈🤣

In all seriousness, we’re happy for this next chapter and enjoying our alcohol free life which involves doing life events alcohol free!

Happy to be enjoying these present moments 🫶🏽🎃

*is that a word? Patrick says it’s a word if you out “-ing”

#noboosneeded #alcoholfreelife by @theafcouple

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a year ago

Hot Toddy season with the gorgeous AF bourbon @kaholspirits 🍋

hot water + lemon + AF bourbon optional honey + mint

Was very excited to crack this out for our pumpkin carving dinner party last night 🎃

We had a great time catching up with some friends, having dinner and homemade pumpkin pie - no boos needed! 👻

Happy Halloween from the AF couple 🧡

#alcoholfree #soberlove #sobriety #noboos #boozefree #healthyliving #pumpkincarving #halloween #mocktails by @theafcouple

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a year ago

First week in Sober October? 🎃

Waking up hangover-free is more than just a relief… it’s a full-body reset! 🌅

In your first 24 hours alcohol-free, your body starts clearing out the booze (one unit per hour!). You might not feel different yet, but trust us — the magic’s coming. ✨

Days 2–3? You might feel a little grumpy or sluggish 😅 — that’s just your brain recalibrating dopamine and your body restoring glycogen. Totally normal. Hang in there — better sleep, energy, and focus are on their way.

By the end of week one, you’ll likely notice:

💤 Deeper, more refreshing sleep
⚡ More energy + sharper concentration
🌈 Hello, REM sleep!
🚫 No more hangxiety
👃Improved smells and senses

Even if you don’t feel all the benefits right away, your body is thanking you behind the scenes and every hangover-free morning is a win! 💪

#TheAlcoholFreeCouple #HangoverFree #AlcoholFreeJourney #SoberCurious #DryChallenge #HealthyHabits #MindfulDrinking #SoberOctober #sobriety by @theafcouple

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a year ago

“Wanna drink?” 🍻

“I don’t drink but I’d love an NA (non-alcoholic)!” 💃

I never thought this statement would be part of my life. I grew up in a huge drinking culture - I just thought drinking heavily was the norm.

There was a period in my life I thought it would be so cool to not drink but struggled to make this a reality. It got to a point where I would regularly think I’m going to take a week break and would fail to make it a few days.

I wasn’t a big drinker but I was a regular drinker where there was usually an excuse to drink almost every other day.

I’m so thankful to be out of that loop! Thirsty > drink > sometimes too much > do or say something stupid / didn’t mean > hangover / regret > repeat 🔂

I now say with pride that we quit drinking together over 3.5 years ago 🤍

This drink was hibiscus and rosehip tea in a fancy wine glass - has no legs but still delicious🦵😆

Love from the AF couple 🤍

#sobriety #alcoholfree #soberlove #mocktail #alcoholfreelifestyle #sobercurious #sobercoach #sobermotivation #cheers by @theafcouple

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a year ago

Patrick’s wonderful grandma, Clare passed at 93 on Sept 16th (same day as Robert Redford) 🕊️

In the past, when someone passed, we probably would’ve taken shots “in their name.” But now we do things differently - no alcohol, just presence. Yes, sometimes that’s uncomfortable but it’s okay.

When I saw Patrick was sad, I sat with him and listened. His advice: lean on people you trust and speak honestly about how you’re feeling. I offered a hug, and continued to listened. We had a long to-do list planned for the day and I decided that that’s not what we needed right now. I asked if he wanted to play a game. His face lit up — “I was just going to ask you that!”

Distraction is one reason alcohol feels effective, but it doesn’t have to be a drink. We played games, had a treat, and later he relaxed with some TV while I picked the list back up. Escapism is part of grief, but it can come from healthy places: a walk, cooking, movies, music, art, time in nature.

Grief looks different for everyone. It’s messy, uncomfortable, not perfect, and deeply human. But it’s possible to honor our emotions without numbing them. And honestly? That feels like the truest way to honor the people we’ve lost.

Love from the alcohol free couple 🫶🏽

#sobriety #soberliving #soberlove #alcoholfree #healthlylifestyle #grief #livingalcoholfree by @theafcouple

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a year ago

Sober rave ‼️

Still feeling so great from yesterday’s sober rave - @dybrkr Daybreaker’s first London event ALIVE:LDN.

My friend Skye and I connected with so many amazing people, sweated it out in the sauna, braved the cold plunges, and danced our hearts out completely sober. The energy was unreal — yoga, cacao shots, fresh fruit, workshops, mocktails, swings, massages… and best of all, not a drop of alcohol needed. We left feeling so refreshed! 🙌

Grateful for the free tickets and already excited for the next one! Highly recommend checking it out 🤍

#Daybreaker #AliveLDN #SoberRave #SoberCurious #SoberParty #MindfulMovement #YogaAndDance #LondonWellness #SoberCommunity by @theafcouple

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a year ago

How I Celebrated My Birthday Without Alcohol 🌺

It’s a great birthday to not be hungover ☀️

This is my third birthday celebrating without the booze. In the past, I definitely had some drinks as a way to celebrate! But I’m thankful for the clarity, energy, and lack of headache 🤕

I did activities that truly lit me up… I worked out in the morning 💪 hung out with friends and family - eating good food, going for a walk and checking out lots of cool art! It was a great day - no booze needed 🤍

How Do You Celebrate Without Alcohol? 🫶🏽👇🏽

#alcoholfree #boozefree #healthylifestyle #couplesgoals #birthdaycelebrations #celebrate #sobermotivation #sobriety by @theafcouple

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a year ago