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tiffany

@thehealher

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~soft landing place
~writer
~sunday lovergirl
~chakra + joy enthusiast
~registered trademark
📍 made in baltimore
📧 [email protected]

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and if I need to shout it for my ladies in the back, just lmk.

ok. ✌🏾luv u. 😘 bye. 🤸🏾‍♂️ by @thehealher

I miss my LoverGirl posts… so I decided it was time to get back to it… sometimes I be needing an outlet from the heavy shit… and trust me, the HealHER space gets h e a v y …

sometimes what I really need is a space where I can just thrive in my softness… and truly be the minimalistic chic, hopeless romantic, perfume + playlist loving girly girl that I am.

some days all I want to do with my online community is share my Pinterest Wedding Mood Board and my wild ass dating experiences 🫠 and show yall the beautiful flowers I found at the farmers market and listen to you all share your LoverGirl stories… and stay at home wife/mom stories… because I love those things too… because at the end of the day, I’m just a girl… a girl who loves love… and romance… and jewelry… and glitter… and good food… and seeing other people happy… but my most favorite thing to see is women being given the space to be the delicate flowers that they are…

this summa my only goal and intention is to have the summer of 24 be the kickoff to one of the best summers I’ve had in a really long time… a summer full of vibrancy… and jazz filled nights… and stolen moments… and lots and lots of love and new healed and healthy romance… because if you’ve been following me from the beginning then you know this page came to be because of a breakup…. and you also know I’m knocking on year 5 of being single and celibate and truth is I’m mf tiiieeeeeddddd 😮‍💨😫😭

so I gotta make room for the things I want to see blossom in my life.. so while I will be active on my HealHER page, but @thelovergirllanediaires page is going to get me just a little more… because that’s where I want to because unlike Donell Jones, I know what I want 😉

but in the meantime let’s all use this post to touch + agree: we’re meeting our husbaes (or wifebaes bc you know I am a 🏳️‍🌈 ally) this summa…

so InstaCousins, cheers to a soft life and an even softer love 💕

and if you’ve already found your person, please do share with the class- how does it feel to be one of God’s favorites and favored (cries in Tyrese)

ps: this is also your reminder to go revisit #kennylattimore catalog, cuz that man be saaanngggiinng 🤌🏾 by @thehealher

I mean of course I want all the beautiful, romantic things and don’t forget the flowers, Bookie by @thehealher

note to self: there’s still time, and i intend to leave room for all of it.
🤎

i think one of the strangest parts of growing into yourself is realizing how much of life you can have figured out and still have a few things that leave you wondering when it’ll finally be your turn.

and lately, i’ve been sitting with that. especially when it comes to love.

because it’s an interesting feeling, being genuinely happy with the life you’ve built while quietly wishing some parts looked different. i’m proud of the woman i am, the peace i’ve created, and everything it took to get here. but none of that makes me want companionship, long hugs, being considered, or having someone to share this good life with any less.

and i think sometimes we get so caught up in learning to be okay with what we have that we forget we’re still allowed to want what we don’t.

which brings me to november.

the first of the month. the first sunday. and somehow, exactly the reminder i needed.

because who decided all the good had to happen before now? who said love couldn’t find us in november? that a prayer couldn’t be answered in december? or that these last two months couldn’t hold some of the most beautiful moments of our year?

i don’t want to spend what’s left of 2026 counting everything that hasn’t happened. i want to enjoy what has, remain excited about what could, and give life every opportunity to surprise me.

i still want the butterflies. the long hugs. the good news. the unexpected invitations. the conversations that change everything. the kind of love that feels just as good in real life as it did when i imagined it.

and i still believe there’s room for all of it.

so november, i hope you’ve been expecting me. i hope you have a little sweetness set aside with my name on it.

the year may be winding down, but life still has so much to show us.

happy first sunday, cousins. may we never become so accustomed to what hasn’t happened that we forget how much still can.
🫶🏾

🎧: come back to you / @victoriamonet by @thehealher

well, look at us. finding our way back to each other on a sunday. 🤎

they say absence makes the heart grow fonder, and i’m learning that applies to more than people. sometimes life pulls you away from the very things that keep you grounded, and you don’t realize just how much you’ve missed them until you find your way back.

for the new faces, hi, i’m tiffany, the woman behind healHER. and if you’ve been here awhile, you already know sundays have always been my thing.

i love having this little corner of the internet to reflect, share what’s on my heart, and find something to look forward to, even when the week behind us gave us every reason not to.

but whew, life has been LIFE-ing.

these last few months brought grief, unexpected turns, and moments that made me question decisions i’d once felt sure about. somewhere between trying to make sense of it all and simply getting through it, i stopped wanting to turn my life into something to post.

not because i stopped loving this, but because i never wanted my joy to become another obligation.

so i stayed away. sunday after sunday. watched the numbers fall. wondered if i’d been gone too long.

but what i missed was never about the numbers. it was the writing, the conversations, and knowing another woman might read my words and find a little of herself in them.

and now that i’m here, i’m reminded that the love didn’t go anywhere. i don’t have to explain the distance or make up for lost time. i can just come back, as i am.

i’m still figuring things out, still learning to trust myself, and still believing there’s so much good ahead. but i’m thankful. i’m hopeful. and i’m finding my flow again.

to those who’ve been here, thank you for staying. to the new faces, welcome. i hope these sundays come to mean as much to you as they do to me.

happy sunday, cousins. oh, how i’ve missed us. 🤎

🎧: “what u want” / nomi by @thehealher

new month… is that you?! i hope i’m not too late expressing my love and gratitude for you… recently i’ve come to discover that somehow, posting late at night has become one of my favorite things. no worrying about the algorithm and just allowing to let my words and work land where they land…

it reminds me of rev run at the end of run’s house, soaking in the tub and reflecting on whatever the day had brought him. lately, though, i’ve been sitting with more than just the day. sometimes it’s the week. sometimes the season. sometimes it’s everything that only became clear once i stopped rushing past it.

maybe that’s why these posts feel different now.

i’m still hopeful. still optimistic. still looking for the lesson and the light. but there’s something different about reflecting once you’ve found your footing.

it’s no longer only, “what did this teach me?”

it’s also, “okay… what am i going to do with what i know?”

and i believe that that’s what september should feel like for me.

not another deadline... or another countdown... and definitely not another reminder that the year is moving quickly and i should somehow be further along.

i’d rather let my proof be in the living.

in what i kept watering when nobody could see it growing. in the boundaries that finally stopped feeling like loss. and in the work, love, friendships and spaces that don’t only ask something of me, but know how to give something back.

i think that’s what i want more of now: reciprocity.

to remember that receiving is part of the relationship, too.

effort meeting effort… care circling back…love recognizing love… the things i’ve been reaching toward beginning to reach for me, too.

maybe “all in” looks different when you finally have your footing.

less pouring yourself empty in the name of possibility.

more knowing where your energy belongs… and moving accordingly.

what i water, waters me too.

and what i want?

i’m making room for the possibility that it has the capacity to want me, too.

happy new month cousins

🎧: sentimental love / Cleo Sol by @thehealher

i think one of the most human things about this life is realizing that very little about it is linear.

our healing isn’t linear. our growth isn’t linear. and neither is the path we walk while trying to become, believe, trust, heal, and keep moving forward.

there are twists. there are turnabouts. there are detours you never saw coming. and sometimes, you even have to put the whole thing in reverse and go back to something you thought you had already moved beyond.

i’ve had to remind myself lately that none of that cancels out the progress.

i can be hopeful and still have moments where i question what is happening… i can trust the process and still wish parts of it made a little more sense… i can believe that God is placing me in all the right places and still be very human about how i feel while i am finding my footing in them.

both can (and do) exist.

and maybe that is what i am learning to give myself more grace for.

life will not always move in a straight line, and neither will i.

but i am still praying for God’s winks.
still looking for the favor. still trusting that even the detours are carrying something with them. still believing that what is meant for me will continue to find me in the right places, at the right time.

and perhaps my greatest superpower has never been getting everything right the first time.

maybe it has always been my ability to love myself back to life, over and over again, no matter how many times the road changes underneath me.

so this week, i am making room for all of it.

the hope… the uncertainty… the rerouting… the favor… the very human parts of becoming.

and trusting that somehow, it is all still leading me somewhere.

so, here’s to reminding ourselves today and everyday that even our missteps have purpose. stay gentle ❣️

🎧: gentlewoman / cleo sol by @thehealher

is it too late to show sunday my love? I know it’s late but I’m confident in my thinking that wherever this lands, that’s exactly where it’s supposed to be…

three weeks ago, i think i thought i would be somewhere different by now.

not necessarily somewhere physically different, but internally.

more settled. more certain. more in rhythm with my own life.

instead, i’ve found myself in another one of those in-between spaces. the kind where you know you’ve been thoughtful. you know you’ve done your due diligence. you know you didn’t move carelessly. you prayed. you researched. you listened to that quiet voice inside of you that you’ve learned to recognize as both intuition and God.

and somehow, things still don’t feel as easy as you hoped they would.

that has been hard for me.

because sometimes i get frustrated with myself for always seeming to find another ebb just when i thought i had finally made it to the flow.

but maybe i have been looking at it all wrong.

maybe flow was never supposed to mean a life without interruption.

maybe it is learning how to stay connected to yourself when things feel uncertain. learning how to trust that a decision can have been made with wisdom even if the outcome asks you to reconsider. learning that changing your mind does not erase the care you took when you made it.

and maybe there is something sacred about knowing when a space no longer feels like it can hold who you are becoming.

i don’t have a neat ending for this one.

i’m still figuring some things out.

but i missed sunday.
i missed this space.
i missed the version of me that comes here without needing to have everything resolved first.

so today, i’m simply easing my way back in.

and if you’ve been somewhere between the ebb and the flow too, maybe you can ease back in with me.

happy sunday, loves. 🤎

🎧: little things by @thehealher

last week, i started a new job, and somewhere between learning new systems, meeting new people and trying to find my rhythm, imposter syndrome showed up in a major way.

for a moment, i let being unfamiliar with the space make me question whether i belonged in it. i became so focused on getting everything right that i almost forgot to honor the fact that i had already made it through the door.

but i do not believe God would bring an opportunity to my shore, place me inside of it, and then leave me without the grace to grow into it. i do not believe He would lead me somewhere divinely aligned only to leave me suspended in confusion, questioning every step.

so yes, last week was about finding my footing. but this week, i want to flow.

not carelessly, and not without intention, but with more trust. trust in what i know. trust in what i am still learning. trust that i do not have to arrive already knowing everything in order to belong there.

i am learning not to mistake being new for being unqualified, or a learning curve for proof that i am in the wrong place. there are things i will only understand by giving myself the time and space to grow into them.

and maybe honoring the flow looks like allowing that process to happen without turning every unknown into doubt.

so this week, i am choosing to be present in the opportunity. to trust what has opened, trust the timing of it, and trust that God will give me what i need as i continue to move through it.

i have already made it through the door.

now, i want to allow myself to fully be here.

I hope you all allow yourself the same opportunity and grace, too.

happy Sundays, cousins
❣️ by @thehealher

i heard this song yesterday and cried before i even realized i was crying.

not because i was sad. not because anything had happened. but because i finally got to experience what so many of you experience when you read my words on Sunday… it was like hearing thoughts and prayers of redemption that weren’t my own but at the same time, were.

i was once again reminded that Sundays can be anything and everything simultaneously.

a pause.
a return.
a quiet place to remember that my life is still moving, even when i cannot see where it is going.

i have spent so much of my life trying to understand every turn before i trusted it. trying to make sense of what ended, what changed, what didn’t work out, and why certain roads led me to a place i never planned to be to begin with…

but sunday keeps bringing me back to this truth: i do not need every answer to keep believing.

God has never asked me to see the whole road. only to keep walking with Him. and even in the seasons when i could not see a way forward, He has always made one.

so today, i am letting sunday be what it has become for me.

a reminder that nothing is wasted.
that changing direction is not the same as losing your way.
that rest can be part of the journey.
and that i am still allowed to trust what is unfolding.

happy sunday, love.

may today return you to hope.

🎧: Sunday / @babyrosemusic by @thehealher

finding my rhythm again… so I went back and took a closer look at… well, myself.

take what you need. happy thursday.

🎧: burning / Tems by @thehealher

july, a little softer, please.

not because i need life to be easy, but because i am learning how to let this month hold me while so much is still moving.

june carried loss in ways i am still trying to name. grief called me by name again. i had to plan my aunt’s funeral, make decisions while hurting, and find language for a goodbye i still do not feel ready for.

and then, right in the middle of all of that, life placed a new beginning in front of me.

a position i had honestly forgotten i even applied for came back around with an opportunity and ultimately, with a yes. not just any yes, but the kind of yes that feels connected to every quiet step, every career shift, every skill i kept building, every season that looked uncertain but was still preparing me.

the serendipity of it all is not lost on me.

how an ending can sit beside an opening.
how loss can stand beside gain.
how grief and hope can both have a seat at the table.
how something in you can be breaking and becoming at the same time.

so this month, i am not rushing myself.
i am not forcing myself to only be grateful.
i am not pretending the ache is not here.

i am just letting july be the hug, the exhale, the comforter, the room to grow, the space to flow, and the reminder that i am still being carried.

there is no coincidence in the way life closes one door and gently places your hand on another.

and maybe that is the hope i am taking with me.

that even after hopelessness, guidance can return.
even after loss, life can still bloom.
even in the dark, something can still be making its way toward the light.

well, that’s all I have for now… i pray that you take whatever you need from this post, and let it walk with you. and may we all never be so knee deep in our grief to the point where we almost miss the very miracles we’ve been praying for.

🎧: lady, lady: Olivia Dean by @thehealher