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THE INTERNAL BLACK STAR

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Bob Rusche,

In 2000 kwam ik naar Nederland. Bij Boudisque in Amsterdam kwam ik jou tegen. Vanaf dat moment werd jij een belangrijk deel van mijn leven.

Je steunde mij als persoon en als muzikant. Dat zal ik nooit vergeten. Het verlies van Arjen Grolleman was al groot, en nu jij ook... Wat nu? Dit is bijna niet te bevatten. Dit is puur verdriet.

Maar je laat ook iets groots achter: een breed scala aan muziek, poëzie, herinneringen en mooie momenten. Jij bent en blijft een legende.

Zoals je zelf zei: “Ik ben een levende vampier die houdt van katten.”

Musick will be the cure.

Rust in kracht, Bob Rusche.

Ewell J. Juliana

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Bob Rusche,

In 2000, I came to the Netherlands. I met you at Boudisque in Amsterdam. From that moment on, you became an important part of my life.

You supported me as a person and as a musician. I will never forget that. The loss of Arjen Grolleman was already immense, and now you too... What now? This is almost impossible to comprehend. This is pure grief.

But you also leave behind something great: a vast world of music, poetry, memories, and beautiful moments. You are, and will always be, a legend.

As you once said: “I am a living vampire who loves cats.”

Musick will be the cure.

Rest in power, Bob Rusche.

Ewell J. Juliana

#bobrusche #xrated taken in Den Haag, Netherland by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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a month ago

As a writer, founder of The Internal Black Star and The Art of Mystification, and a Social-Pedagogical Counselor, I believe in the transformative power of inner strength and life's mysteries. Daily, I aim to inspire others to discover their unique paths, think creatively, and push beyond conventional limits. My goal is to help individuals unlock their potential, prioritizing flexibility and resilience. Together, we are cultivating a world where strength and mystique harmoniously coexist.
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Als schrijver, oprichter van The Internal Black Star en The Art of Mystification, en als Sociaal-Pedagogisch Hulpverlener, ben ik overtuigd van de kracht van innerlijke transformatie en de mysterieuze aspecten van het leven. Dagelijks zet ik mij in om anderen te motiveren hun eigen weg te vinden, buiten de conventionele kaders te denken en creativiteit te integreren in zowel hun persoonlijke als professionele leven. Mijn doel is om mensen te ondersteunen bij het ontdekken en ontwikkelen van hun potentieel, waarbij flexibiliteit en veerkracht centraal staan. Samen bouwen we aan een wereld waarin kracht en mystiek samensmelten.

#theinternalblackstar #theartofmystificationrecords #chaosmagick #theartofcos by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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2 years ago

#theinternalblackstar #theartofcos #theartofpain #ewelljjuliana by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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4 days ago

44 — The Age of the Builder
What was carried within must now be built into the world.

#itsmybirthday🎉 #theinternalblackstar #theartofcos #ewelljjuliana by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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8 days ago

by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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8 days ago

Dear friends and followers,

Lately, I haven’t been posting much, and in the coming period I will also be stepping back a little from posting online.

At this moment, I am moving through turbulent times, but also through times filled with new opportunities and deeper meaning. In this coming season, I want to spend more time face to face with friends and family, and be more present in real life.

My new book The Art of Pain will be released this month. This is my month, our month — the month of the Cancerians, Mask of Dead.

Despite the deep loss of Bob Rusche, we will continue to celebrate life for him, the way he would have wanted us to. His spirit, his words, his music, and his presence will remain with us.

We will stay in touch. Keep an eye on your DMs.

With respect and love,
Ewell J. Juliana taken in The Hague Netherland by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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21 days ago

by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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a month ago

Bruxelles!
The hidden world is not far away.
It is carved in stone.
It flows through water.
It watches from above.
Bruxelles reminded me:
Darkness is not evil.
Darkness is the origin.
The Black Star is the place inside us where pain becomes a symbol, shadow becomes a teacher, and silence becomes vision.
Look deeper.
Read the signs.
Become the light that survived the dark.

#bruxelles #theinternalblackstar #ewelljjuliana #theartofcos #belgie taken in Bruxelles, Belgium by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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2 months ago

Happy World Goth Day!!! Early 2000!

#happyworldgothday by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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2 months ago

Many people think illumination means escaping pain, contradiction, or shadow.

I don’t.

I think real illumination is integration.
It is what happens when awareness becomes embodied, when truth becomes lived, and when light no longer needs to deny darkness to exist.

My next Substack post, “Purple: Illumination Is Not Escape,” is about wisdom, wholeness, and what it means to remain fully human while becoming more conscious.

#ewelljjuliana #substackwriter #illumination #integration #brandawareness #innerwork #healingvibes #theinternalblackstar #theartofcos taken in Den Haag, Netherland by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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2 months ago

Silence is not always wisdom.
Sometimes it is pressure.
Sometimes it is fear.
Sometimes it is the truth with no place to go.

My next Substack post, “Blue: Truth Requires a Voice,” is about honesty, communication, alignment, and the cost of carrying too much unsaid truth inside the body.

#ewelljjuliana #substackwriter #truthseeker #healingvibes #innerwork #Awareness #Communication #theinternalblackstar #theartofcos taken in Den Haag, Netherland by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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3 months ago

Many people think healing means becoming softer, quieter, easier to hold.
I don’t.

Sometimes real healing is not self-erasure.
Sometimes it is the courage to return to yourself with truth, compassion, and wholeness.

My next Substack post, “Green: Healing Is Not Self-Erasure,” is about the heart, compassion, boundaries, grief, and what it really means to heal without disappearing.

#EwellJJuliana #SubstackWriter #Healing #InnerWork #SelfRespect Awareness ShadowWork TheInternalBlackStar TheArtOfCOS taken in Den Haag, Netherland by @theinternalblackstarofficial

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3 months ago