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N/arc 🅴

@thriune

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"The more unstable the conscious, the greater chance of success."
l
occasional coffee connoisseur

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I've had a lot on my mind recently, like my entire identity and self belief are falling apart. But I won't speak of that today, as I have something else to address.

Women, PLEASE. For the love of God, PLEASE. I beg you. Stop wearing your fuckin underwear outside. "Oh but I do it for myself" that isn't the point. There are creeps, hideous people that will state at you lecherously and you complain? "Ugh these guys are all creeps." Maybe don't fuckin wear your panties outside. You look like you're about to go for a quick fuck and go home straight after. but in reality you're going to the mall heels and all with THAT? It disappoints me greatly. Please, for your own good wear something less revealing because there are men like me out there who WILL stare at you with bad intentions like the fucking slut you look like.

What kind of brainwashing has the world undergone for people to end up normalizing this kind of thing? This world is twisted and rotten. It makes me regret the mercy God gave us when he swore he'd never flood the world again. Most will only wait for the second coming of Christ, but I want to see this world in a better state. It doesn't have to be everyone. Some humans are just truly born that way. I want to fix this world and convert as many as I can, reshaping the worlds entire beliefs. but then again, I'm but a single man.

I babble too much on an account no one follows. I suppose it's alright since it's meant to be a collection anyway. by @thriune

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13 hours ago

This vibe of being a loser, being this rebel punk personality is something I can't let go of. Sure, I'd love to be rich and famous too, but at the end of the day, my personality lies in both.

Often times I doubt myself, and that doubt is indication that maybe I'm not a born entrepreneur, maybe I'm not built for this. But fuck it, I'll do it anyway. Somehow. Exactly like how a machine may not be a smoke machine, however if it tries hard enough, it'll make smoke anyway.

I'd also like to smoke a cigar one day. I'm not a big fan of cigarettes in the first place, nor alcohol. I guess I'm just a larper, but hey, I like my own health too. Who gives a shit if I'm larping? If it's in private for my own enjoyment, what say do people have in it? Nothing.

I do suppose I've gotten better. I used to talk insanely negatively about myself, how I wasted two years. But then again, that's me. That's my decision, my lack of effort. I can't talk of the current me like he is someone else, I'm not an entity better than him, since I am him. I'd love to talk more positively towards myself from now on. I may not have as much time as I've had, maybe another version of me is way better off. But then again, that me and me are different people, we may bear the same name, the same genes, the same mind, but that's not me. The decisions and mistake that make a person differ, even from the same person. If I were to do everything perfectly, then I wouldn't me the me today. Do I think that version of me is better? Ofcourse. A million times ofcourse. But that isn't me. THIS is me. There's no going back, only forward. Now do I go downward? Or upwards from here? That's my decision to make, and it's up to me what I choose.

Do your best, me.
-You, from sometime ago. by @thriune

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2 months ago

The concept of the "self" I was is long gone. That boy is dead, and what remains isn't a husk, but a culmination of the horrid sins humanity have come up with.

I have these thoughts, thoughts that would make the people closest to me barf their guts out and murder me if they were to find out. The closest. And I tell you now that there are very few people I consider close.

I'm a monster, not in the way that I'm a murderer, a psychopathic piece of shit, or anything along those lines. I simply am a wretched and rotten "person"

I'm fully aware of these thoughts. The little humanity left in me is the only fragment left I can consider "real". Everything else is fake and I'm aware of it. Truly I hope that God will make me real, that something in this world will make me real. The last pieces of my humanity left ignore these thoughts, I simply starve them of any attention, as it is my last and final line of defense before I cross the line and do something I'll forever regret and repent for in the deepest pits of hell.

I won't deny nor accept this fate. I simply yearn for change. And truly I hope that somewhere on this earth, that catalyst for change exists. For this mask I wear is peeling off revealing the hideous being beneath. It'll be only a matter of time... A matter of time...

I believe God gives everyone a purpose. But then I'm reminded of the possibility that there is a necessary evil needed in this world. And I pray that it isn't me. make me the light I was again, not the dark I am now. by @thriune

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3 months ago

Often times I wonder what's wrong with me? Why is it that I struggle with giving up everything I am to the Lord when all I am is bruised and battered? Broken as I may be do I still feel mighty? Unfaltering? Utter foolishness. I am the fool of fools, the clown for clowns, a Jester, performing and keeping appearances only to the man in the mirror, deceiving what is only himself. A fool such as I deserves no life but God only knows of what I'm capable of and picks me back up, over and over, as if to fulfill a purpose. What is this purpose you may ask? I have no idea. I've been aware of such things, as an intelligent fool, but then again, I've made no significant progress towards it, as a fool always does. I am completely aware that my fate rests in the hands of God, yet why do I refuse to hand over what was originally his? A self destructive habit, that never went away. One I pray that will. by @thriune

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3 months ago

You imbeciles need to learn to take life a little less seriously. I'm not one to downgrade and insult people anymore, but life isn't all about grades. You pester others with your weakhearted mindset and make it unbearable to be around you. Fix yourself and maybe I won't have temptations of breaking my promise to NOT tell people to kill themselves. That's all by @thriune

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5 months ago

I'd be lying if I said I never cared. What was born out of lies became truth and in truth I was hurt.

Yet today I let go. I find that there's no more point in such a chase. I've bigger things to achieve.

My future needs me, simple. It hurts to admit but there is no youth left for someone like me. This isn't an anime or rom com manga, just a life full of choices that actually matter. To some there may be love, to some may be fun, to people such as I there's purpose.

I give up. May you live your life happy. I'm just poison to anyone I meet, for only the snake is immune to its own venom. by @thriune

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6 months ago

Takopeak's Original Sin

Good morrow fellas, we're back with another review, this time we have Takopis original sin, and I've gotta say this has got to be one of the most, what's the word, masterpiece? It's a piece of work that has a good story, a good plot, and a not so happy ending. It's a perfect 10/10. No questions asked. Though it may have dark themes, and a not so bright story, you can really just feel for the characters. The way the story unfolds itself to you throughout the watch is truly beautiful. In hindsight the what ifs seem simple, but if you truly look into it there really is no better ending. Like it or not, her mother and father will never get back together, her dog and father will never acknowledge her, but together they both are united through this bum ass octopus. Now I'm not a critique, I'm just a regular guy. But this has got to be one of the best watches I've had in my entire life.

Overall a 10/10 though you wish it'd have a better ending, you already get the best and you'll be left unsatisfied, but that's the beauty of it.

- N/arc by @thriune

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7 months ago

I've a hobby. Just one.

I often visit coffee shops every Friday whenever I get off school to wind down after a stressful week. I don't use any map or look at ratings, I go in and see for myself what it tastes like.

Today was a stressful ass week. 2 days of long tests, 2 days of exams, and I flunked every single one of them, hell I even flunked my fkn major. What an awful week. I don't really care all that much, but it does suck for your efforts to go to waste.

I decided to go about my usual routine. I go to marikina, and explore, find a coffee shop I feel has good coffee, and buy a cup. I made sure to update my parents ofcourse. I'm lucky to have loving parents as is. They worry for me, and I got home especially late today. I understand. They're worried. I'm not so blind of a teenager as to not see that. I'll comply. But this is my one hobby, I've no interest in anything but getting rich. Can't I just settle down for a few hours once a week? I understand. But it sucks still. I can't tell them. I'm not a horrible son, just a disappointing one.

I give up being a scholar. Graduating is enough for me. I just want to be rich. But I suppose I won't have a hobby anymore. Too bad. Lmao.

I'll come back to school, I'll be okay, but I truly see no point in being among any of you. I do this for the sake of my parents. I truly do not fucking care whatever happens to this shit hole of a school. The girl I like doesn't like me back aswell, and I can see why I've never had a valentines too, I'm just an asshole and I just won't change. It's fine. Tomorrow's valentines will be like any other anyway. I really don't deserve all these blessings. I should fucking die.

Here's a few pics from my adventures. I won't ever get to do them again anyway.

I don't even know where this is going lol, bye I guess by @thriune

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8 months ago

Though I may not be above everyone, all that matters is that you're below me. by @thriune

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9 months ago

I had coffee for this one unfortunately, but if it was a White Monster it would've been way cooler lol by @thriune

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9 months ago