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Tamika Louise | Mum • Chronic Illness + More

@thrivewitht__

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For the woman quietly thinking
“this can't be it.”
Seen + heard. Never encouraged to settle.
Health • Life • MORE ↓

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I’m never going to be the person telling someone living with chronic illness to “just think positive.”

Fuck that.

I still live this.

I know there are days that are hard.
Days that feel heavy.
Days where you just need someone to actually 𝐒𝐄𝐄 you.

Not fix you.
Not minimise it.
Not tell you somebody has it worse.

Just understand.

But I also don’t believe that being seen means being left there.

Your villain isn’t chronic illness.

Your villain is the belief:

“𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞.”

𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓’𝐒 the belief you’re here to fight.

How many of you have quietly believed, “I guess this is just my life now”?

If that’s you, comment 𝐌𝐄.

I promise you’re not the only one. 💛 by @thrivewitht__

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24

2 months ago

𝗧𝗛𝗔𝗧 took me longer to get back than anything else.

Because chronic illness didn’t just change how I felt.

It changed how much I allowed myself to 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁.

My world has become about managing.

Appointments.
Symptoms.
Getting through the week.

And somewhere in there…

I stopped asking, “𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗱𝗼 𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁?”

And started asking, “𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗜 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗹𝗲?”

The truth is, chronic illness still dictates a lot of my days.

I’m still in and out of hospital.
I still have days where my body doesn’t agree with me.
Days I ache and there’s nothing to do but ride it out.

But I don’t let it be 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗺𝘆 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝗶𝘀.

So I had to start making changes for 𝗺𝗲.

Not because everything is magically getting better.

But because I realised I don’t just want to cope better.

𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗺𝘆 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸.

And slowly, things started opening up again.

Hope.
Different choices.
Building something of my own.
Income.
Options.

But also pieces of 𝗺𝗲.

𝗠𝘆 𝘀𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗸.
𝗠𝘆 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗱𝘀𝗲𝘁.
𝗪𝗵𝗼 𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝘀.

It’s not about pretending my circumstances are different.

It’s about allowing myself to 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗮𝗴𝗮𝗶𝗻, despite them.

My diagnosis might explain my story.

𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝗶𝘁 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘄𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴. 💛

And if you’ve been in survival mode for so long that you’ve forgotten what 𝗬𝗢𝗨 actually want…

Just know you’re not the only one. 🌻

𝗛𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗳𝗲𝗹𝘁 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂’𝘃𝗲 𝗹𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗽𝗶𝗲𝗰𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝗮𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘆?

Tell me below 👇 by @thrivewitht__

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2 months ago

𝗬𝗲𝘀, 𝗜 𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗸 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗶𝗰 𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘆 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲.

They’re more connected than you think.

Because when your health changes what your life looks like, you start looking at things like freedom and security differently.

I didn’t want my circumstances deciding how much freedom I was allowed to have.

I didn’t want my difficult seasons to become the blueprint for the rest of my life.

And I definitely didn’t want to spend my life waiting until I felt better, had more energy, or everything was perfectly lined up before I started building something for myself.

𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝗽𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀.

More flexibility.
More choice.
More ownership over what my future could look like.

And THAT is why these two conversations belong on the same page.

I’m not here to tell women going through hard shit to “just think positive.”

I’m not here to pretend circumstances don’t matter.

I’m here to show that hard circumstances don’t automatically have to mean a small future.

And I’m building mine one imperfect day at a time. 💛

If you’ve been quietly wondering what I’m building, or maybe you’ve been craving more options in your own life too…

Comment 𝗠𝗢𝗥𝗘 and I’ll show you. 💛 by @thrivewitht__

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2 months ago

Because something always needs you.

The kids.
Work.
Appointments.
Bills.
The house.
Your health.

Something needs sorting, someone needs you, something unexpected happens… and you deal with it because that’s what you do.

And I think that’s where I’ve caught myself lately.

I’m not unhappy.

I’m not ungrateful.

I actually fucking love my life.

And maybe that’s why admitting I want more has felt uncomfortable sometimes.

Because what do you mean more?

I have a husband I love. Beautiful kids. A home. A life I’m genuinely grateful for.

Surely that should be enough?

But I’m starting to realise gratitude and ambition were never supposed to cancel each other out.

Loving the life I have doesn’t mean I have to stop imagining what else could be possible for us.

And I do want more.

More money.
More choices.
More experiences with my family.
Something I’ve built for myself.

Something I can look at one day and know I backed myself enough to actually build it instead of spending years wondering whether I could.

Because it’s scary how easily the things you want become the most movable thing on the list.

The kids need you? Yours moves.

Money’s tight? Yours moves.

Health goes to shit? Yours moves.

Life gets hectic? Yours moves.

And eventually “I’ll do it when things calm down” can quietly become years.

I don’t want that.

I don’t want to look back and realise I was so busy being responsible for the life I already had that I never gave myself permission to build the one I kept thinking about.

So no, “surely this can’t be it” isn’t me hating my life.

It’s me knowing I’m not finished building it yet. 🤎

So tell me… what’s been sitting in YOUR “when things calm down” pile for way too fucking long? 😂👇🏼 by @thrivewitht__

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4 hours ago

For a long time, I gave myself a lot of credit for being able to push through shit.

Feeling good? Do everything.
Feeling shit? Somehow still try to do everything. 😂

And don’t get me wrong, I’m proud of how much I’ve managed through some really hard seasons.

But “look how much I can handle” is not the goal anymore.

And this is probably the biggest reason high ticket made sense to me.

Not because it’s easy. It fucking isn’t.

I still have to show up, learn, create content, have conversations and actually build the thing.

The difference is I can do that work around my life instead of constantly rearranging my life around work.

At home on the couch.
Sitting in the car waiting for the kids.
At night when everyone’s asleep.
In the random pockets where my body and life actually give me something to work with.

THAT is what I needed.

I didn’t need a way to avoid working hard.

I needed somewhere better to put the hard work I was already willing to give.

And if you’re now thinking “okay Tamika, but what the hell is high ticket?” 😂 comment MORE and I’ll show you what all the fuss is about, how it works and what getting started looks like. 🤎 by @thrivewitht__

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5 days ago

Don’t get me wrong… I want more money, who bloody doesn’t 😂

I want to contribute more.
I want big goals.
I want to be able to say YES more often without immediately doing the mental maths afterwards.

But there are a few things I’m just not willing to trade for it anymore.

1. More time with my kids.
I’m not interested in earning more if it means missing more of their lives to do it.

2. More time with Rob.
I don’t want the answer to wanting more for our family to always be him working more hours either.

3. My health.
I’m ambitious as fuck, but running my body into the ground isn’t a flex I’m interested in.

4. Every spare pocket of my day.
I don’t want to finish work just to start another job from my phone and somehow call that freedom 😂

5. Actually enjoying the life we’re working so hard for.
Because what’s the point of creating “more” if we’re too bloody busy to enjoy any of it?

I think that’s been one of my biggest shifts.

I used to think wanting more money automatically meant I needed to do more, work more and give more of myself.

Now I care just as much about how I create the income as I do about how much I want to create.

I still want more.

I’m just not willing to sacrifice everything I wanted the money for in the first place to get it.

Anyone else?

We’re all out here hustling trying to create more…

but I refuse to hustle so fucking hard for a better life that I don’t have any time left to actually live it. 🤍 by @thrivewitht__

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6 days ago

I don’t want more money just so I can somehow find another 12 things to do with my time 😂

I don’t want to build something that has me glued to my phone all day, working every spare second and calling that “freedom.”

That’s not the goal for me.

I want to earn more without needing to give more and more of myself to do it.

Because I already have kids.
A husband.
A house.
A body that does whatever the hell it wants some days..
And an actual life I want to be present for.

I’m not trying to become the busiest person in the room.

I’m trying to build income in a way that gives me more room to actually live.

That’s the whole point for me.

More income, yes.
More chaos? Absolutely fucking not. 😂

If you’ve been looking for a way to earn more without accidentally building yourself another full time job… that’s exactly what led me to high ticket.

If you’re curious what that actually looks like, comment “MORE” 🤍 by @thrivewitht__

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6 days ago

Last week it was a hospital stay with Aria, a son fighting asthma, Dad still needing care and my own body running on about two hours of sleep a night, trying to keep up.

I still opened my laptop. Not every day, not for long, but I did. Because the whole reason I started building this was so a week like this didn’t mean choosing between being at their bedside and keeping something moving for us.

But we still managed one fun day together over the weekend, for my niece’s birthday. That’s what I’m building for. Days like this, not just the ones I get through.

I didn’t start an online business just to become unavailable to my kids in a different way. Last week is exactly why that mattered.

Was your week chaos too? The kind where you just held it together? Tell me below 🫶🏻👇🏼 by @thrivewitht__

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9 days ago

School holidays have literally just started and my brain is already full of things I want to do with the kids.

Take them places.
Make plans.
Say yes.
Give them fun days.
Actually enjoy having them home.

Meanwhile, the last few days I’ve been emotional, my body has been aching and I’ve still been getting up and doing all the normal life stuff anyway.

And that’s the part that gets me.

Because mentally, I’m ready to go.

I want to be the mum doing all the things with them.

But sometimes my body is sitting there like… absolutely fucking not. 😂

And I think a lot of mums who live with health stuff understand that weird guilt.

It’s not that you don’t want to do more.

Sometimes you want it so badly.

You’re just constantly working out what your body can actually afford that day.

So these holidays I’m trying not to measure whether I’m a good mum by how much I can pack into every day.

Some days might be outings.

Some days might be slow.

Some days might change completely.

𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝗺𝘆 𝗸𝗶𝗱𝘀 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺 𝘀𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗼𝗹 𝗵𝗼𝗹𝗶𝗱𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺.

They need me there.

And I can work with that.

Any other mums go into school holidays with a huge list in your head… and a body that has its own plans? by @thrivewitht__

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15 days ago

I swear I’ll say, “We’re having a quiet one today”…

Then somehow it turns into groceries, washing, kids, cleaning something I definitely did not plan to clean, running somewhere “quickly”, sorting the house, answering messages and doing 47 little jobs that apparently don’t count as plans. 😂

Then I’m lying down wondering why my body is acting personally victimised by the day.

Like babe… you said quiet.

I’m definitely learning that just because I can squeeze more into the day doesn’t mean I need to.

Some energy needs to stay mine too. 🤍

Please tell me I’m not the only mum whose “quiet day” looks like this 😂 by @thrivewitht__

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17 days ago

There are days where my body is telling me to slow down… but my brain is already doing the maths.

Can I afford to take the day off?
Do I need to push through?
What happens if I can’t work as much this week?
What else will need to move if my body needs more from me?

And I’m tired of that being the choice.

I don’t want looking after my health to automatically feel like I’m taking something away from my family financially.

I want to be able to listen to my body when it needs rest, without immediately stressing about what that means for our income.

That’s one of the biggest reasons I’m building something different now.

Not because I never want to work.

Because I want more control over how I earn, so my health and our income don’t constantly feel like they’re competing with each other. 🤍

If you’ve ever had to push through because resting felt too expensive, you’ll know exactly what I mean x by @thrivewitht__

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20 days ago

Not every exhausted mum needs another routine, planner or “5am club” telling her how to squeeze more into her day.

Sometimes she’s exhausted because her body already feels like it’s working overtime just to keep up… and then she’s still expected to show up for work, the kids, appointments, the house, the mental load and everyone else who needs her.

That’s the part people don’t always see.

You can love your family deeply and still have nothing left by the time you get home.

You can want to be present with your kids and husband and still feel like work, on top of an already exhausted body, has taken the best of you.

For me, that’s become one of the biggest reasons I want to build differently.

I don’t want my family getting the version of me that’s completely spent from pushing my body through another day.

I want enough of me left for the people I’m actually doing all of this for.

If this feels a little too familiar, tell me I’m not the only one. 🤍 by @thrivewitht__

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4

21 days ago