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Kate Lap | work, growth & global life

@with.kate_

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Building a smarter, healthier & richer life - one experiment at a time.
Work • money • health • relationships • global life

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I’ve spent years consuming other people’s thoughts, stories and questionable life advice on here. Figured it was finally time to contribute some of my own.

No perfectly defined niche yet. Apparently, having several interests is terrible for personal branding. We’ll survive :)

Just the things I genuinely think about: work, AI, ambition, money, motherhood, relationships, health, and building a life you actually like living.

Some things I know a lot about. Some I’m learning in real time. I’ll be sharing both.

Worst case, this becomes a very public record of my hyperfixations.

Let’s see where this goes.

#microinfluencer #newpage by @with.kate_

After 8+ years in People Operations, sitting across the table from people asking for more money, I can tell you it almost never comes down to whether someone “deserves” it.

Everyone thinks they deserve it. That’s not the point.

Here’s what I’d do if I were the one asking:
1 → Ask for a “compensation review,” not a raise. One sounds strategic. The other sounds like a complaint.
2 → Time it after a win. Right after a strong quarter, a closed project, a visible result.
3 → Make it stupid easy for your manager to say yes. They’re not the final decision, they have to take this upward. So DO the work FOR them. Put together a one-pager: what the market pays for your role, your recent wins, and the business impact you’ve had. That one-pager becomes their argument in the room you’re not in.
4 → Speak the company’s language. Every business cares about 2 things: cutting costs or driving revenue. So frame it that way. Don’t say “I’ve been working really hard.” Say “I cut the process from 30 days to 10, which means we move twice as fast with the same team.” That’s a language decision-makers understand.
5 → Never compare yourself to a coworker. The moment you say “but they make more”, you’ve lost the room.
6 → Be specific with the number. “I’d like to move to [X]” lands completely differently than “I was hoping for a bit more.”
7 → Say the number out loud before the meeting. Most people freeze on the actual ask because they’ve literally never said it with their own mouth. Practice it until it sounds boring to you.
8 → Say your piece — then stop talking. Silence after the ask is the most powerful thing you can do.
9 → If they say no, ask: “What would need to change for the answer to be yes in 3 or 6 months?” This one move separates people who stall from people who advance.

And one more thing - don’t wait to be invited!
If it’s been a year with no compensation review, you’re allowed to nudge it. A simple “I’d love to revisit my compensation given the current market and inflation” is not aggressive. It’s professional. The people who get ahead are the ones who don’t sit quietly hoping by @with.kate_

Beyoncé is a Virgo
Zendaya is a Virgo
Salma Hayek is a Virgo

my husband is a Virgo
my son is a Virgo
I’m a Virgo

😭😭😭

we don’t celebrate Virgo season.
we are Virgo season♍ by @with.kate_

Sorry, but I’m not entering my slow-living era anytime soon. I’ve got way too many things I want to experience 😅

Are we team optimization or team slow living? 👀

I’m a director, entrepreneur, wife & mom sharing my take on money, ambition, psychology, wellness & building a smarter, healthier, richer life.

Stick around if that’s your vibe. 🫶

#OptimizationCulture #AmbitiousWomen #IntentionalLiving by @with.kate_

The delusion is strong. The free time is nonexistent.

#ambitiouswomen by @with.kate_

I don’t believe children need to struggle financially to develop ambition.

My husband and I are working to give our son opportunities we didn’t necessarily have growing up.

But we also talk a LOT about how to raise someone who understands the value of money and doesn’t take everything for granted.

He’s only three, and we definitely don’t have all the answers.

But I keep coming back to one thought:

Why should our children have to overcome the same obstacles we worked so hard to overcome?

I’d rather teach my son how to use his advantages responsibly than deliberately take those advantages away.

Parents, I’m curious: where do you draw the line between giving your child a head start and giving them too much? by @with.kate_

AI is getting smarter. Are we?

4 skills worth developing to stay relevant in the AI era. And no, you don’t need another degree to start.

Which one are you working on? 👀

#CareerGrowth #PersonalGrowth #FutureOfWork by @with.kate_

I’ve spent a ridiculous amount of time listening to podcasts, reading books, and going down health science rabbit holes.

And some of what I’ve learned has genuinely changed how I approach exercise, recovery, and longevity.

Like realizing that being strong doesn’t automatically mean being cardiovascularly fit. Or that training for the body I want at 70 might look different from training for the body I want today.

So I put together 6 resources worth adding to your watch, read, or listen list.

I’m not a fitness coach. I’m just a very curious 34-year-old trying to build a smarter, healthier, richer life.

Thursdays are for the healthier part. 🫶

Save this for your next health rabbit hole.

#WomensHealth #HealthyAging #Longevity by @with.kate_

Your biggest competitive advantage might be something you don’t even consider impressive.

Because when something comes naturally to you, it’s easy to assume everyone else can do it too.

But your skills, experience, connections, even your circumstances? Combine them strategically, and suddenly you have leverage.

And leverage doesn’t replace hard work. It makes your hard work go further.

So I’m curious: What’s something that comes easily to you but other people find difficult? 👀 by @with.kate_

1. ❌ “Tell me about your experience.”
(I hate this question.)
✅ “What’s the project you’re most proud of, and why?”
A completed task? An improved process? A transformed department? The complexity and ownership reveal someone’s actual level at which they operate.

2. Ask for the LAST time, not hypotheticals.
❌ “How do you handle conflict?”
✅ “Tell me about the last time you disagreed with someone. What happened?”
Real experiences > textbook answers.

3. Whenever you hear “WE,” find out what “I” means.
“We increased revenue by 40%.”
Cool. “Which decisions or ideas were personally yours?”
Participating in success ≠ driving it.

4. ❌ “What’s your biggest weakness?”
Let me guess. Perfectionism. 🙃
Instead, ask:
✅ “Tell me about a decision you got wrong. How did you realize it, and what did you do to fix it?”
OR
✅ “What’s ONE thing you could improve that would dramatically change your results?”
Follow up: “What are you doing about it?”
Self-awareness + accountability. That’s what I’m looking for.

5. See how DEEP someone can go.
Ask: “What’s one complication you faced that nobody looking at the final result would know about?”
Then: “Walk me through how you solved it.”
People who’ve done the work can usually explain the messy details.
Depth > word count.

6. Don’t stop at the success story.
Ask: “What happened 6 months later?”
Did the results last? Did the solution actually work?
Launching something ≠ making it sustainable.

7. ❌ “What’s your leadership style?”
Instead: “What’s something your team used to need you for that they can now handle without you?”
Great leaders don’t just solve problems. They develop people who can.

My biggest lesson?
Stop asking people to describe how good they are.
Ask them to show you how they think and what they’ve actually done.
And always ask one more question!!

📌 Save this for your next interview. Send it to someone who’s hiring.

Follow @with.kate_ for more on career, money, psychology, health & building a better life. ✨

#interviewing #career by @with.kate_

📖 10 min: nonfiction + notes
🎤 5 min: explain what I learned out loud
🏡 15 min: study, work-related (currently studying real estate development)
🧩 5 min: solve a problem without Googling/case study generated by chat gpt
🧘 10 min: meditation
📚 10 min: fiction or non work related, purely for the joy of reading

what would you add?

#healthyhabits #brain by @with.kate_

Not me thinking giving birth in America would cost $100K 😂

Turns out, doing your homework before ruling something out can take you pretty far. Even across continents. ✈️

Curious: how much does giving birth cost in your country? 👀

#motherhood by @with.kate_