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Loretta Belladonna Donatacci -auntie advice

@yourauntlbd

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A Jersey Italian aunt who ❤️s you aggressively
Mr Rogers meets mob wife
85% real,15% fiction
Created by @makingupforglossedtime
📧[email protected]

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Holy shit, kiddos! 🤯

In the last two weeks, over 100,000 of you have decided to follow this leopard print wearing, foul-mouthed broad from Jersey—for some stories, some laughs, and hopefully some messages of love (and self love).

I’ve been hanging out here on the Instagrams for two years, popping on here and there to remind you to smack the world upside the head with all your awesome —and to get your sleep and drink your water.

But for some reason, lately…what I have to say is really connecting with you. Your emails and your DM’s and comments have been so heartfelt. Many have brought me to tears. The good kind.🥹😉

So many of you have said you wish that you had an aunt like me. Well, kiddo…YOU DO.

Thank you for being here, thanks for the love notes, and stay tuned for more stories and advice.

I love you all… to the moon and back, and back again.

And if you want some love notes from me from time to time, comment CONFIDENCE below.

Aunt LBD 💋 by @yourauntlbd

After the success of my mob wife aesthetic post, there were conversations that maybe my mob wife character needed a name and a permanent rotation in my Instagram feed.

There are a lot of votes on what her name should be—some good, and some that proved that a lot of you don’t have any Italian friends and haven’t watched any mob movies.😂

So, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Loretta Belladonna Donatacci—Aunt LBD for short. Your aunt LBD is unfiltered, and gives great in-your-face life advice. You can expect that she will also deliver that advice mixed in with some makeup and over the top style tips to help you tap into your inner Jersey girl. Be prepared for conversations about dating after divorce, dating over 50, being your own boss, and more.

Today, it’s a quick conversation about being true to yourself and authentic while she gets ready to go to the CVS.

👉🏻 want your aunt LBD’s advice on something? Pop your question into the comments below ⬇️

👉🏻follow the hashtag #auntLBD for all of your Jersey auntie posts!

@natori @victoriabeckhambeauty
#mobwives #mobwife #mobwifeaesthetic #mobwifestyle #jerseygirl #jerseygirls #mobboss #ladybosses #auntlbd #jerseystyle #italianauntie #auntieadvice #lifeadvice #betheboss #bossy #shestheboss #internetaunties by @yourauntlbd

Happy Halloween, kiddos. From me & Rosetta. 🧛🏻‍♀️ by @yourauntlbd

Morticia sans Gomez.
Happy Halloween, kiddos. by @yourauntlbd

Your Auntie cleans up good.

suit: old from @mango
shoes: old from @colehaan
shirt, tie & brooch: thrifted by @yourauntlbd

A love letter to my soul’s sister

Dear Leslie:

I only have a few friends in my life that I have known since childhood. The time of pajama parties and notes passed in class, first crushes and first heartaches. The kind of friends who know who you were as a kid, and who have been a witness to everything that you have become since.

I thought the way I felt with them could never be duplicated— until I met you.

I didn’t know that sitting next to you at a party over 20 years ago would become a friendship that would eventually feel like finding home, but here we are.

In the past couple decades, we have seen each other through marriage and divorce, the birth of your children, grief and loss, triumphs and failures. We have laughed over ridiculous things that most people would probably not find funny. We’ve done stupid shit in public—and one of the absolute joys in my life is saying something to you that makes you fold in half in laughter.

I saw a post recently where someone asked: if you lost your memory, who would be the one person you would turn to to remind you who you are— and I know, with complete certainty, that person would be you. You have been a witness to my life, you have been behind the curtain of my heart, you know the me at the core of who I am when every facade I try to keep up falls away. You know my darkest secrets, you celebrate me when I’m crushing it, you don’t judge me when I’m not.

You are my safe place.

As an only kid, I always wanted a sister.
I finally got her when I met you.

I’m so grateful I got to celebrate your 50th trip around the sun. And I’m so grateful that I’ve been a witness to over 20 of them.

Thank you, sweet friend, for building a home for me in your heart.
I love you endlessly.❤️

poem by josiebalka by @yourauntlbd

Are you in a situationship?

Hi kiddos

Just learned this word from the kids… “Situationship.” It’s a relationship where it’s not quite everything that you want but you keep that person around to fill a void for a while.

Had this conversation with my girlfriend Barbara from down the street. She’s got somebody in her life that she knows is not the right guy for her, but she’s been keeping him around because they have a fun night out once a week, some good chemistry, and she figures it’s better than being lonely.

I told her she’s got herself a placeholder— someone that you know isn’t going to be in your life forever, but you’re allowing to hold space in your life and in your heart until you find the person who is right for you. We do this in romantic relationships and in friendships. Looking at people with rose colored glasses, and holding onto the little glimmers of fun and connection, even though we know deep in our heart that this person is not right for us for the long haul.

But here’s the thing, kiddos. Holding onto people like that is like when you go to one of those fancy dinner parties and someone has assigned all the seats. It’s comforting at first, because you know who you will be sitting with. On the other hand, it may also be a roadblock for you to make new connections, maybe encounter someone who is right for you— who will show up in all of the ways that you need, and love you for all of your awesome. Although keeping placeholders in our life can seem like a good short term fix, in the long-term what they wind up doing is becoming a source of expended energy— and that energy we are spending on them keeps us from being fully gassed up for when we meet someone wonderful.

So take an inventory, kiddos. Divide up the people into your life into “A “people and “B” people. Your “A” people should be people who meet you where you are, who love and support you, who give just as much as they receive. Your “B” people need to be looked at more closely…consider if they are worth your energy.

Maybe ask yourself, “do they love me the way my Aunt LBD does?“
That answer will tell you everything.
Love you, kiddo❤️ by @yourauntlbd

Breaking hearts since ‘71. 😜 by @yourauntlbd

How young is too young?

Last week I mentioned that I was going on a date with someone in their 30s, and a lot of you caught onto that. Some of you celebrated me, and quite a few of you said that you’ve been thinking about dating younger, but have had some concerns about their intentions and also about how it will look if you are dating someone who’s not much older than your own children.

Here’s what I’ll say about it: I’m 55 years old and most of my friends are younger than me. I believe that age is an energy and you attract energies into your life that align with yours.

In the last three years that I’ve been single, I have dated mostly men in their 30s and 40s. I don’t look at it as some “ego boost“ for me… I believe it’s because my energy attracts them. I’m fun, I love to live life, I want to go out and experience new things. And I have found that that energy aligns better with men who are younger. Many of the men who I have dated from my generation and older, are sort of stuck in their ways and are expecting someone to be stuck along with them.

I’ve done that. For too many damn years. And I’m going to spend the second half of my life living it the way I want to.
And a guy needs to figure out if he can keep up.

All of my gals who are worried about how it will look if you’re dating someone much younger, I’ll ask you this:

Are you limiting your potential joy based on optics?
Are you really going to walk away from someone who’s potentially a great match for you just because society tells you that you shouldn’t?
And are those opinions coming from people you even give a shit about?

I’ve spent a lot of of my years worried about what other people thought. I’m no longer worried about who’s age-appropriate for me. I’m going to seek out those who are lifestyle appropriate.

Live a big, full fucking life, kiddo. Whatever your age.
And fuck ‘em if they can’t handle it.

Love you 💋
Aunt LBD by @yourauntlbd

Please, Retta, don’t hurt ‘em by @yourauntlbd

Rosie went for a 30 second swim today.😂 by @yourauntlbd

Let’s have a heart to heart, kiddo.

It’s September 11, and every year on this day I always take some time to reflect.

I grew up just on the other side of the river from Manhattan. And I have so many memories of standing across the river and looking at New York City and those two majestic towers, standing tall at the southern end of the island. From time to time, I will come across an old picture of me with the skyline behind me and the towers still visible, and my heart will ache just a little bit.

After the towers came down, I remember going home and the first time I saw the skyline, I lost my breath. I could FEEL the loss of them. It was like seeing a family portrait with one person missing. Something didn’t feel right. And it never did after that.

I remember walking the streets in my hometown and all the shop windows were papered with photographs of the lost, the missing. Loved ones that would never be found. There was a heaviness in the air. It lingered for a long time.

People were angry, tensions were high, it was a painful, painful time. And a lot of people wanted someone to blame—so they turned to people who looked like the people they saw on the news. Whose names sounded similar, who came from the same place. Seeing the backlash toward that community was heartbreaking.

But what I also remember…was the love.

This feeling of community— where people slowed down, took their time, and were kinder and gentler with each other. I was proud to be an American then. That’s what I thought America was supposed to feel like.

I don’t know what happened, and I can’t pinpoint when it did, but that has changed. We are suspicious of each other, trying to read someone’s intentions and motives and beliefs, just by looking at them. We’ve lost sight of each other, and of ourselves.

We lost the love.

I hope, deep in my heart, that it’s not too late to get it back. I gotta believe that it isn’t. Because the alternative is just too hard to bear.

I love you, kiddo. ♥️ by @yourauntlbd