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ainsleigh jayne🌷

@ainsleighjayne

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pushin’ 20
💝🍰🎁 taken in 19 Years by @ainsleighjayne

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8 months ago

one year, or approximately 525,600 minutes, isn’t a long time in the grand scheme of things. its only about 1/79 of the average human life expectancy. only 1/19 of mine. this year, however, was the first one in a decade that i spent without rackers. i didn’t know a life without him, and over the past year i’ve been trying to navigate it. here is what i’ve learned:
-you should always listen to your theatre teacher. he probably knows what he’s talking about, and you definitely took it for granted when he was with you. not knowing what to do in a scene because he’s not there to tell you for the first time in your career really sucks, but ultimately you can probably figure it out from some random lecture he gave you at one point or another.
-grief is NOT linear. it is bumpy. it is difficult. it is heart wrenching and it absolutely fucking sucks. you can’t have an expectation to get over it by a deadline, and there will be days that just breathing feels difficult. slow it down and take it one step at a time, and if it gets to be too much, its okay to take a break.
-you are allowed to quit. it is okay to not want to do things anymore. if it doesn’t make you happy, don’t do it. its not worth it.
and finally,
always keep the voice of rackers in the back of your mind when you’re performing, and know he is always proud of you. despite your grief, he wants you to continue.
i love you and i miss you every single minute of every single day.
🦄🤍 by @ainsleighjayne

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5 months ago

i first met mr rackers in 2016 auditioning for joseph and the technicolor dreamcoat. to think its been nearly 10 years of knowing him feels insane, but it could never ever be enough.
rackers was one of those teachers that made you question your sanity. i literally thought i was going to lose my mind sometimes doing shows with him. he was brutally honest, sometimes harsh, and absolutely brilliant. i never questioned, not once, not ever, his care for the shows. i never questioned how much he cared for me. each and every student that entered his room, or walked on his stage, would agree. he drove us all crazy but we ALL knew that it was because he loved us. we knew at the end of the day he was proud of us.
almost my entire theatrical career has been spent with rackers. from the moment i met him, all i strived for was a performance worthy of his iconic “BRAVO!”, whether it be on stage or through the various technical responsibilities i took on as i aged. everyday i would work beyond what i thought my limit was, because of the expectations he set. in the moment, it was hard, i was tired, i was annoyed, but ultimately it has made me a harder worker and a completely different person than i could have ever imagined being.
and i cannot credit anybody but HIM. he pushed me to be the BEST performer, the BEST designer, the BEST possible person i could be. i learned how to act, i learned how to operate that BS light board, but most importantly, i learned pride, courage, discipline, respect, and professionalism. he provided that experience to learn, but also that space that i felt safe enough to take those chances.
he was different than any teacher i ever had. every ridiculous joke, every piece of advice, every bit of sass, rings forever in my head. i don’t know a life without him, and grappling with navigating the “after” is proving to be an extremely difficult task. but rackers, i know for a fact, would be tapping his pencil on his music stand and telling us to go on. and so, rackers, we perform for you one last time. but really, every performance, for the rest of my life, is for him. bravo, rackers, bravo. 🦄🤍 taken in Unicorn Theatre by @ainsleighjayne

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a year ago

same time next week @katie_ladybug27 ?
🍂📓🍱 taken in With Love by @ainsleighjayne

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3 days ago

day off in chicago!
👻🌃🎤

phoebe bridgers lost weekend 2026!
#cried taken in Scott Street by @ainsleighjayne

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24 days ago

mom approves
📸🧡🎶 by @ainsleighjayne

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2 months ago

keepin’ it sunny
🌞📸🎧 taken in Under The Sunshine by @ainsleighjayne

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2 months ago

sorry if i flashed you
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dirty rotten scoundrels! i cant express how much i missed performing and this truly was such a special experience! i love my people, and this show!
#nichereference #frenchrivieralife #j13 by @ainsleighjayne

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3 months ago

divin’ into summer!
🌻🤍🍓 by @ainsleighjayne

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5 months ago

HAGS!
🌸🌼🌺

second semester was DA BOMB DOT COM! lots of changes, lots of hurdles, but im lucky to have the bestest of company through it all!!!! by @ainsleighjayne

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5 months ago

playin’ dress up
💋🪞🗝️

theta formal 2026!
#tlam by @ainsleighjayne

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5 months ago

are we up?
🪩⭐️🎊 by @ainsleighjayne

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6 months ago